i just got informed that my fiance died of heart attack. i am numb all over. i feel like i just died too. there's no one to talk to right now (3:35am). how will i survive today and the following days to come?
2007-07-21 08:39:14 · 28 answers · asked by shirley g 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Thank you all for your answers and heartwarming messages.
My fiance was buried on the same day that he died so I didn't have the chance to fly to see him and his family.
I have lifted myself up to the Lord for comfort and rely on Him for me to be able to accept the past and what lies ahead.
Yahoo!Answers had been sort of my therapy during this hard and painful time. So, again, thanks to all of you.
God bless!
2007-07-29 03:23:32 · update #1
i also have lost someone that i love dearly. in the beginning it was very hard and i didn't know how to cope. time does heal all wounds and you discover that your love for them doesn't stop just because they are no longer living. at first it hurt to even breath , but then the next breath comes and then the next. you survive this moment . and if that's all you can deal with that's okay, life keeps coming this moment becomes this morning and your still okay then it becomes yesterday, then last week , then in eventually last year, and like simply goes on . you make yourself live on for them and eventually be happy because that is what he would have wanted for you. cry, talk about him,let it out it, it really does help , you will be okay you have to let yourself. think about his favorite joke . or some thing that he did to make you smile , then here is the hard part let yourself smile it's okay . celebrate his life try not to morn for it
2007-07-25 15:49:03 · answer #1 · answered by farra 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We grieve differently, when some people experience such an lost they may laugh ( I know it sounds weird), some people shut down, some ignore the death because they don't want to acknowledge the pain that comes with it, some people cry and scream, and there is those that chose to deal with the death head on and go through the grieving process. When you are ready you will cry allow your self time to cope with the lost of your partner. I can tell you from experience not dealing with the issue now will truly hurt you in the days and months or years to come. If you can talk about him with your family or friends do so as often as someone is willing to listen. I know that at this point in your life you are not thinking of dating again, but pray fully you will in the future dealing with this lost or not dealing with it could affect any relationship that you might have in you future. I will share with you that the days to come will become easier as the days pass. Cherish the memories of the times that you shared with him. Good Luck my heart goes out to you.
2007-07-28 20:59:30 · answer #2 · answered by soldierlady226 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Grieving a lost love is important and very normal. Every fear you have right now is real and is part of the grieving process. You will have to endure the pain and possible guilt. There is little anyone will be able to do to change your feelings right now.
Using your intellect, not your emotions, realize that a year from now, your loss will still be with you, but your life will have continued. Is this the last person you will ever love? I doubt it. Is this loss going to dramatically change your life? I think not. Always remember, death is an important part of life. Be grateful for the time you and your fiance had together.
Now, continue to grieve, but know that your life must continue.
2007-07-29 02:04:43 · answer #3 · answered by johny0802 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will survive, and the days will get easier, but there will be days that will to hard to get thru. My husband has been gone 5 years, and this last year was a whole lot easier than the one before. You have to go on with your life and do what Your fiance would like you to do. My prayers will be with you .
2007-07-21 16:21:19 · answer #4 · answered by LIPPIE 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is completely normal. First please accept my condolences. what you are passing through is called "Shock freeze". This usually happens upon hearing really big PERSONAL bad news. It doesn't happen in public bad news such as typhoon or storm. The diagnosis is usually upon hearing the bad news you pass through a stage that is emotionless. you are sad but you don't feel you are up to the level of the news in terms of expression. This last between 3-6 days and then the reality sinks in. The longer the freeze is the bigger the breakdown. That's why it is usually recommended to expedite disclosure such as funeral in this case.
2007-07-29 05:03:01 · answer #5 · answered by Ed 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my mom passed ,she also died of a heart attack I couldn't cry because I didn't want to believe she was gone. A part of me have died to, I was dead in my spirit. What I did was close myself from everyone to grief alone for a couple days. Next I took it day by day, I have to accept it that she was gone, and that she wouldn't want me to shut my self down, but to go on with my life.
2007-07-26 22:09:52 · answer #6 · answered by dbrh_soto 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry this happened to your fiance and to you.
Just accept all the help that is offered. Give your fiance's family all the attention you can. Ask for help if you need it. Pray. Try to get as much rest as you can.
2007-07-28 18:17:30 · answer #7 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to CRY, Shirley! It will help. Or shout it out to the wind outside your window. Then talk to THE ONE UP THERE. Beg for HIS mercy to lighten you up, to cure your pain, to heal your wound. He in an expert on everything. He knows who He wants to show His kingdom to right now. He will eventually bring all of us there someday...to be reunited with the loveones who went there ahead of us. Your fiance in in The Best of hands now. He'll find peace there, don't worry.
He'll know how much you love him and will hope you'll be happy here too, having the happiest memories of him.
2007-07-27 04:48:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i am sorry for your loss.....people grieve differently....while your heart may not be able to express it right now, it will in time. whether it may be by looking at a photo or hearing a certain song....the memories will hurt and an outfall of emotion will follow. but when all is done, and your heart has mended, you will have your memories to bring you joy instead of sadness.
keeping a journal of your emotions may help you to come to acceptance of his passing. when you can't sleep, when there's no one to talk to etc. i did it with my loss and in time it did help me more than what i had realized.
knowing that people are there for you to help you in your time of sadness and sorrow is a comforting feeling that will help you too.
take care of yourself.
2007-07-28 23:34:01 · answer #9 · answered by karianna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, condolence to you. It is very important to express that pain you are feeling. Maybe you are just experiencing a delayed reaction. Time will ease your pain. In my experience I cried only twice when my dad passed away - when I learned about it and during the funeral. It took me 2 years to overcome my grief and pain over my his death.
2007-07-27 10:46:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋