Me and my hubby have sex all the time and we had and we didn't take a pill or use a condom and I am pregnany, but my hubby hates children and I love them! I went to the doctor to make sure of it and it is true, I don't know how to tell him without him freaking out on me ! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-07-21 08:32:25 · 23 answers · asked by dramadiva23 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
He sounds like a real jerk.
2007-07-21 08:35:57 · answer #1 · answered by stella 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like something you should have worked out before getting married - that's a pretty big difference in opinion on such an important topic!
If he feels that strongly about not wanting children, then he should have taken more care to use protection or abstain from sex, because he (and you as well) should know that anytime a penis enters a vagina there is a risk for pregnancy occurring.
Nothing you can do now but be honest with him and confess. Either he will warm up to the idea over time, or he won't. You have to decide if you are willing to be a single parent, because that may very well happen - you cannot control what he chooses to do.
2007-07-21 15:38:23 · answer #2 · answered by Take A Test! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You tell him! Plain and simple
If he "freaks out" on you than he has a problem.
Thus....You have a problem!
And the problem is not the pregnancy.
The problem is the irresponsibility of both of you.
Look again at the first two sentences you wrote.
Honey...You want to act like adults....Than maybe it's time you acted like adults!
Having a child is not only a gift but a major responsibility and a lot of hard work.
What's sad is both of you seem to regard having a child is like getting a puppy. You want one, he doesn't....No biggie!
OK....Here's the scoop. Statistics say overwhelmingly that phase 2 of daddy freaking out is daddy moving out.
For the child's sake I hope not!
Most people talk it over and think long and hard before buying a new car. Good luck!
2007-07-21 15:51:58 · answer #3 · answered by hoovarted 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whether or not you want to have children is something that should be discussed before you even get engaged. There isn't much point marrying someone who doesn't want kids if that is the most important thing in the world to you -that is just setting yourself up for divorce or an unhappy marriage.
Not using birth control when you or your spouse don't want to have children is just ridiculous. Yes accidents can happen but this is just insane. Tell him he made his bed and now he has to lie in it. And get some marriage counseling or else you are in for huge problems.
2007-07-21 15:48:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
shouldn't you both have agreed on this important issue BEFORE you married? If he freaks, too bad. If you have sex, you run the chance of getting preggo...I don't care what type of birth control you use. Remember, it takes two to get pregnant. Chances are, he'll just need some time to adjust to the idea and once the baby is born he will fall in love. Give him time and be supportive even if he reacts bad at first. Good Luck and Congrats!
2007-07-21 15:37:56 · answer #5 · answered by 4 Shades of Blue 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to just sit down and tell him that you are pregnant. What's done is done and he will probably love the baby once it's born. He will have responsibility as the father whether he's happy about it or not. If he does not want any more children, you guys should use protection in the future so you do not get pregnant. Find you another man who does want children if you want them badly enough.
2007-07-21 15:36:31 · answer #6 · answered by mljk74 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it seems to me that this is an issue that would have been best to resolve before you got married. Did you ever discuss what would happen if you got pregnant accidentally? Did you ever consider not marrying someone who hates kids if you love them? Do you want kids in your life or not? Did you agree to have kids or did you agree to not have kids? It is normal for married people to have sex but, it is also a good idea to have a plan for what to do if something like getting pregnant happens. Why didn't he have a vasectomy if he is so against having kids? Sorry for not being able to sensitively answer your question but, it seems like this situation was almost inevitable and I just can't imagine that you never talked about what you would do if...
And if you did discuss it, what did you agree to do?
2007-07-21 15:40:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you guys probably should have had this talk before getting married...
If you knew you wanted children and he knew he didn't, that should have been a red flag to consider moving on.
But now that you've gotten yourself committed to a guy who doesn't want to have children... you have quite the problem! Either way, you are going to have to tell him. Just handle one problem at a time. Right now, whats most important is that you and your baby are healthy, and that you tell your husband.
Also, you may want to give your husband a little sex education. Unprotected sex = Pregnancy. That's the way our bodies work. If he wasn't ready to have kids, he should have covered up.
Good Luck Telling Him!
2007-07-21 15:46:47 · answer #8 · answered by Kelly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok well for starters... if your hubby feels that he doesnt want your baby. why in Gods earth would you want to be with him?! And what a better time to find out... cuz you now have a baby on the way! Believe me if he is a jerk this is the time you will find out. Plus if he is older than 5 years old he must know that having unprotected sex leads to babies HELLO!
2007-07-21 15:40:24 · answer #9 · answered by Lolita24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is something you both should've worked out prior to marriage. The decision to have or not to have children should be up to both people. You should've taken your pill and he should've used a condom and you both should've talked about this before hand. Now you have a child on the way, hopefully things get worked out for the childs sake, Lord knows they didn't ask to be put into this situation. You need to tell him asap. Take responsibility for your actions! My heart goes out to your unborn child. Stupidity on yours and your husbands part.
2007-07-21 15:40:33 · answer #10 · answered by Heather D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think this is something you should have discussed before you got married, I hope your relationship is strong enough to hold through the next 18 years.
My husband has totally stepped up the plate as we are expecting our first, give him a chance. Besides we all know the tough exterior our hub's show isn't what they really feel.
2007-07-21 16:19:39 · answer #11 · answered by Karen K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋