He's dropped out 3x already and my mother has paid every time. Recently she paid for a down payment on a Honda Accord ($1000, and he himself put down $3k). He still lives in my Dad's apartment and pays NO expenses and works part time as a teller and smokes pot everyday.
My mother works hard doing retail and basically spends all her money she makes on him. I just want her to save it. Now she says she won't be able to visit my kids from Colorado (we're in NJ) as much because she can't afford it anymore. Everytime she comes here she rents a car to take dinner to my brother and see him because he won't come to see her even though it is only a .5 hr drive.
Anyway, I told her I can't believe she is paying for his school again and she said she is not giving up on her son and her tone of voice sounded upset to what I said. What do I say, I just want to avoid the whole conversation because there is no talking sense into her but how? Just be silent during conversation
2007-07-21 05:18:06 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
btw, I mentioned tha the pays no expenses towards living with my Dad and my Dad was unable to pay rent this last month because he is out of work. My brother still doesn't pay anything but he manages to save 3k for a car and pot.
2007-07-21 05:19:14 · update #1
I know that is difficult but the sad fact of live is that this is her son and she is and probably will continue to try and support him until he grows up and starts acting his age (which may never happen). Fact is that it is your mom's cash and so she can and will spend it as she sees appropriate. Your brother sounds a bit like a lost soul as well as a very selfish young man. At his age his dependence on parents should be a lot less than it is, but obviously he is too much into himself. I realize that your feelings must be very hurt to think that your mom will not be able to see her grandkids as often because she is helping out their uncle so much. Hopefully someday soon your mom will let him know that he is on his own and she can then spend some valuable much needed time with her daughter and her family also. Best of luck to you, your brother and mother.
2007-07-21 05:31:02 · answer #1 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Damn.... that does sound pretty messed up. I have 2 uncles the same exact way, they take money from my grandma, they live with my grandma, make NO effort at all to help pay bills or support their pot smoking habit, this is terrible what the heck is this world coming to, a bunch of lazy lo-lifes.
If I had advice for you Rooney, I would of already used my own for my family. Im sorry to hear this because these kind of situations are hard to deal wit' sometimes. Just hang in there, and everything should be fine.
2007-07-21 12:48:47 · answer #2 · answered by Mommy to 2 A.n.g.e.l.s 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think of the split is honest sufficient...in spite of each and everything you're procuring the mattress room. $500 for each room. If he have been given a roomate, than they'd pay $250 each and every. that's in basic terms honest that there is two human beings in the different mattress room, and he has one to himself, that he pay greater. If he replace into going to stay in a dorm/on campus accomodation, there could be no much less partying occurring than if he's residing together with his brother. He would additionally be greater suitable off seeing using fact the individuals partying are older and not as naive and green as college newbies. he would be partying no rely the place he is going, the 'undesirable impacts' would be discovered no rely the place he finally ends up. that's not honest to ask the different couple, and your older stepsons female chum, to pay greater to make it much less perplexing to your youthful stepson. If the money incredibly concerns you likely you will desire to ask the two brother to split $750 a month 2 techniques (each and every will pay $375).
2016-10-22 06:36:43 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi! I have a feeling your brother is suffering from depression. The dope only masks it. Helps him cope. Your father is probably lonely and actually enjoys his son living there, although a helping hand would be greatly appreciated. I can relate to everyone in your family. Try to focus on the positive. Your brother did save the money for the car, he is working, he is still near the family. I do not believe in tough love. Read the book on it before you label it. My kids are always welcome in my home, their entire life, spouces and kids, too. Family means you help one another. Think out of the box. You are only looking at the symptons, not the reasons. Your mother and I could be friends! I relate to her trying always. If she wasn't happy to do this, she wouldn't. Your brother could be a leech, but I doubt it. He is working. My best advice is to get him to the doctor . Depression takes many forms. There is help. Stay in touch if you want. Send your family my love.
2007-07-21 06:50:38 · answer #4 · answered by pickles 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mother can do what she wants with her money. If you are so against it, when you turn 18 move out. If you are already an adult, move out. Let her live her own life. You don't want her telling you about your bad decisions, do you?
2007-07-21 05:22:59 · answer #5 · answered by harleychic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mom and Dad need to start some tough love on this guy or they will be broke and he will be no where in life,Make him stand on his own two feet.
2007-07-21 05:25:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like some one has a favorite.
2007-07-22 02:44:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
she's going 2 do what she wants.........
2007-07-21 05:21:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋