how can i spice up my sex life? my husband is very reserved no toy or 3somes help!?

Question

my hubby is very reserved old fashion so yeah... doesnt wanna use toy or another girl so im not sure what we can do...

well i have asked my husband what he wants to do and all he tell me is that maybe we can try like flavored lotion and stuff like that. And thats all i get. we already do anal and all that see here is the problem i have a higher sex drive than him. so i want it like all the time and i wanna switch it up b/c i dont want it to get boring. he cant even role play cuz he laugh so thats out of the question. we have tried many times but its just feels weird cuz he laughs.

Answer 1

why would "normal" sex be classified as reserved? You wanting to bring anothe rgirl to your marriage bed is perverted. Maybe you're the one with the problem.

Why dont you try communicating with your supposed soulmate instead of asking strangers on the internet.

You chicks need to stop reading cosmo.

Answer 2

Since you have a higher sex drive than your husband, then go out and buy you a toy anyways. Experiment on yourself when he's not home. Once you are comfortable with it, let him come home to find you using it. If he sees how much pleasure you are having, then he may want to try something new.You don't have to bring another woman into the bedroom. Try lighting some candles and wearing a sexy outfit. Put on some music or watch a porn movie together.Try making love in different rooms of the house. It doesn't have to happen in the bedroom all the time. There are different ways to spice up the love making. But sometimes the woman has to take the initiative to change the way men think in the bedroom. Your husband doesn't have to know about the new toy you bought until you are ready. Self masturbation is normal and can lead to a better sex life. Good luck and have fun.

Answer 3

If he laughs when you try to role play, it's probably because he's not comfortable w/ it and is embarassed.
But maybe to get him on that track.
Penthouse stories, and other erotica is kinda fun to read and get you in the mood. Flip through a penthouse or a play boy together, talk about who and what you think is hot and turns him on.
Go ahead, start w/ the flavored "lotions", move onto, ice.
(I used to put it in my mouth and go all the way up and down his stomach, inner thighs, his............you know what. Mix that w/ some warming lotion, and you could get some crazy sensations. (as could he)
Do it in the shower, go down on him in an elevator, or a coat closet, somewhere.
Tell him your going out for the night, then knock on the door an hour later, dressed in nothing but a pair of fishnets high heels and a trench coat.
Set the mood. if he's going out for the night set up a room in your house w/ big pillows and candles all over.
Pack a picnic, w/ a couple bottles of wine and a blanket and put on some of your most easily accesible clothes "tiny skirt and a strapless tank.
I'd say a 3 some could likely ruin your marriage, but maybe some of the other ideas might help.
Good luck.
I know..............boring sex is frustrating.

Answer 4

if he is more reserved try doing something more on the cute side than dirty. Make him a little coupon book that has different positions you can do or just a massage night, bubble bath night ( it all leads to something and the anticipation may be what you need for excitement). Along with that get him a book on positions and you two can read it together and try some things out ( make sure to find a book that is not too over the top so he isn't buckling over with laughter). I hope this helps- good luck

Answer 5

I agree with some of these other folks...there is a lot of things that you can do without bringing another person into the bed room (unless you really want to) "old fashioned" is just another term for "not experimental" Have you tried asking him what he wants or would like to try? It definitely takes two to make a marriage work, but if someone isn't happy in the bedroom it doesn't matter how hard you work at everything else. Start with the little things candles, music, massages, different positions, dirty talk, those little things you know that turns him on, dress sexy, oils, etc. Don't get too drastic too fast, just ease him into the experimentation.

Answer 6

My ex-husband was the same way and one thing that worked for us was a game we played. It was a strip poker game but with a twist. We would think about it all day and come up with a list of things we wanted or wanted done to us. We would write each one down on a small piece of paper. When we got down to being naked then when one of us lost we had to draw from the pile of pieces of paper. You will be surprised at what he can come up with when given all day to think about it. Plus the anticipation will have him really cranked up. You just have to agree to do whatever is written no matter what which just adds to the excitement. Also let him do something he thinks is naughty, such as watch porn or look at a magazine but with you around. Sometimes they just need help getting out of that shell. But once they do they find they can be more comfortable with an understanding partner.

Answer 7

you will desire to decelerate his %. a splash and discover a thank you to place the pains of the international out of sight for an afternoon or 2. possibly a weekend getaway to a place the place the two one among yo had large cases. Have days whilst the could be not talk approximately life's tension components. you may build as much as intercourse. in simple terms cuddling and having mushy moments creates a base want. Dressing up the night with some good wine and delicate lights which comprise some very fascinating outfit and massive music can set the temper. sounds like the two one among you like time far flung from the grindstone.

Answer 8

Ok this is one of the major things in a marriage. This exact problem is why many people stray out of the marriage. Ok start with lotions , sexy laugerie, etc. Then when he is feeling comfortable then step it us a notch. Plan a surprise strip tease with sexy music playing(Kieth Sweat is a great choice), light candles, and find the naughtiest negligea you can find and surprise him when he comes home. Men like surprises. If that doesnt boost him up alittle then honey my best bet is go to the local sex shop and buy you a vibrator or something of that nature.

Answer 9

Sometime a different scenery is good. Go to a romantic vacation or even an out of town hotel to spice things up. YOu can even be loud to bother the people next door. You can also do it in the open or on a rooftop, just to spice things up. A quickie is always good anywhere, car, behind the bush or in a spa or swimming pool :)

Answer 10

How about role playing?

Here's a list for the reserved:
* No touch sex
* Wish fulfillment
* Dancing (wrestling, bull-riding) nude
* Massages
* Be handy around the house
* Constant foreplay (rub or rest your body parts (arms, hands, head, elbows, fingers, hips in his sensitve areas constantly)
* Be the aggressor (not a needy or demanding aggressor, but the consistent, amenable, willing type).
* Make yourself open and vulnerable to him sexually
* Dance for him
* Use your imagination
* Provocative clothing (daisy-mae shorts, teddies, ripped items, exposed shoulders, bra-less, wife-beater shirt with midriff exposed
* Talk about his "manhood"--how much you like it, can I see it etc.
* Ask him to dress like someone completely different (like a woman, a plumber, construction worker or whatever)
* Be confident (nothing is sexier than confidence)

Answer 11

Use your imagination then!

My first choice would be toys, but since you dont think he will go for it....

Role Playing is a good alternative. He has a fantasy, everyone does. Maybe he wants you to dress up or pretend to be a Nurse, a Nun, a Policewomen, a Cheerleader, every guy is different.

Positions are good too. Each position will feel different for him and you, so just experiment!