Is it better to divorce if unhappy in a marriage or to stay together for the kid(s)?

Answer 1

I'd try marital counseling first and if nothing could be resolved then I would try to split as amicably as possible. Kids don't need to see a dysfunctional relationship as their primary model of romantic interaction.

Answer 2

I think that it is better to be divorced than in an unhappy marriage, especially if you guys are fighting in front of the kids. I can't remember where, but I read once that children are better off in the long run if parents get out of a bad marriage instead of staying for the kids sake. Children pick up very quickly on undertonesin a home. You really need to think about it.

Answer 3

Even if you're not fighting, your children will see that you're unhappy. Having a depressed parent is very damaging to children and add that with an image of an unhappy marriage and the pending divorce when they are adults, ouch! In fact, divorce hits teens and adult children harder than it does the young ones, at least when it comes to the ability to form lasting relationships and contentment.

Divorce is pretty socially acceptable these days and shame won't be a factor for your child. In fact, you divorce and the kid might fit in better at school! Contrary to popular cultural belief, children don't really need two parents to be okay. I think the two parent nuclear family is fast becoming an out dated concept. Your kid will be fine.

Answer 4

It's best to grow up and stop tossing around the d-word in your marriage. You don't give any details of your marriage or say how old your kids are, but this is less about the kids and more about being happy. What did you two do to let your marriage deteriorate to the point where you think divorce is a good idea? Why have you given up on the person you promised God and a roomful of your family and best friends that you would love until one of you died? Or did you just promise to love each other until it got too hard?

Assuming you're asking a rhetorical question, I'm going to go with option (C) and fix the relationship by focusing on my spouse's needs, remembering why I fell in love with her in the first place, learning better communication skills, being a better husband, and trying harder to get along with her. Any marriage can be saved if both sides are willing.

Answer 5

It's better to make the changes necessary in order to be happier and have a more peaceful home for yourselves and your children. This is the person YOU picked and couldn't live without -- now make it work! Kids from divorce are at greater risk for not forging a real relationship when they are adults and though many of them make it through -- divorce tears them up. It is extremely painful for children... so the best thing you can do is figure out how to make peace for your kids' sake -- and your own too. (This is considering the person is not beating you, on drugs, or sleeping around)

Answer 6

Stay together, but not just for the kids. Make changes in the marriage (read books, go to conferences/seminars, find a mentor as I said in the previous question).

I think just about any marriage can be healed & become a healthy, thriving one.

Answer 7

I think it's better for the kids to see you happy and divorced than sad and married.

Answer 8

Your children need to you give them the best life possible. They don't have the means to know what is best for them. You need to decide if the best is staying with your husband or leave. When you have children you make a sacrifice - you have a life in your hands that depends on you and needs you to help them until they can help themselves.

Answer 9

Well if your unhappy...like fighting all the time and really hate each other then yeah divorce...if you have periodic spats then it is okay...marriage you are bound to fight just as long as you make up....

Answer 10

if youre both unhappy then get a divorce, the kids will just see you fighting everyday