why am i still heartbroken? my ex and i broke up in november.. which was about 9months ago. i've dated and stuff but im still head over heals for him. the reason we broke up was cuz he cheated on me with another girl, and then he broke up with me after i found out. i remember crying myself to sleep every night. i remember once i had a friend over and he signed onto msn but he wouldnt talk.. i was also listening to the radio at the time and our song came on and burst into tearss.. he really cared about me.. i know he did. he kissed me everyday. and gave me the warmest hugs he could give.. my question is what do i do? how can i get over him. and you know what hurts the most? he wants me back but im afraid he'll hurt me aagain and make me go through all i did in the last 9 months.. what do i do?
2007-07-20 13:09:26 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
hey girl! woahhh this is scary i had the exact same experience last year. but let me tell u some advice i got from my friends on this:
1. (from my best guy friend who is 23) >> any guy that cheats on you is not even someone you should consider ever again. a guy that loves you wouldnt and shouldnt hurt someone they claim to "love"
2. (from my best girl friend who was cheated on and went back to her ex twice) >> once a cheat always a cheat (plain & simple)
3. (from my sister who is married) >> if you go back to that guy he knows he can hurt you and you'll still forgive him
4. note that id like to point out: why is it him breaking up with u after u found out?? shouldnt it be the other way around?
5. songs make u sentimental, but just try to think, why would he do something like that if he really cared about u? thats not caring at all.
6. girl i could go on and on and i know it goes through one ear and out the other (same with me lol) but just know this, you need to get over him, its hard i know, but let him do the chasing if he wants to change things, if he doesnt let it go and find someone that makes you happy not give you more **** an d tears in your life. you need a guy whos supportive and loving and who you can feel comfortable with, if u went back to a guy who hurt u once what about all the memories, lack of trust that he might do it again?
7. and one more thing, ask him the fullfrontal question, why does he want you back? did things not work out with the chick he was cheating on you with?
8. my heart goes out to you girl, ive been there and it bloody hurts. you gotta be strong and try doing other things to keep u occupied, things you enjoy to take ur mind off him and to start loving youself again so u can find a nicer guy that truly does care.
*** answer to your main question: why am i still heatbroken? it takes time to get over someone you thought u really loved, u put ur feelings on the line, they wont go away in just a sec.
2007-07-20 13:24:25 · answer #1 · answered by Shnuggles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all if your even thinking like taking a bottle of pills and never waking up call 911 immediately get help No Man is Worth taking your Life over Hell No One is Second Of all Sometimes Relationships don't work out and yes it hurts and it takes time to get over the hurt You can do it Everyone at one point or another has been through this You can start By Stopping Beating yourself up. Sometimes that's just the way the cookie Crumbles so to speak. Some relationships work some don't It's Not Your Fault Got News for you hun it's part of life unfourtantley you will get your heartbroken but it's not the end of the world I would say go out with this other guy but whatever you do take it slow. Take your time.
2016-05-18 22:42:30 · answer #2 · answered by kesha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel. My husband cheated on me when I was pregnant with our first child. I chose to forgive him and make our relationship work. Granted, we were married, and expecting a baby. He had another affair right before our daughter was born and beyond my own reasoning, I actually forgave him and stayed. However, I made it very clear that I would not put up with it anymore. He knows damn well that if he ever does something like that again he will be out in the cold and here we are 5 years later enjoying our two children and expecting a third!
I am not saying that you should take him back, but you might consider having a long discussion with him about why he did what he did, why he left you, why he wants you back, etc. And do what is best for you.
2007-07-20 13:36:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best advice that I could give you granted I don't know you so I can give you a straight answer. Follow your head the most reasonable advice comes from your mind. When your head and your heart sync then and only then should you take him back.
Meaning talk to your guy tell him how hurt you were and listen carefully. If you mind tells you he is lying walk away. You might not want to but just think how bad you might fell if he cheats on you and dumps you again.
There are guys everywhere and everyone deserves to be with a man that does not make them feel like they did something wrong.
2007-07-20 14:40:58 · answer #4 · answered by bigblade15 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry for your heartbreak. I know how it feels to hurt in love. Let me tell you what I did - I bought books and I wrote poetry. I found ways to involve myself in other peoples lives so that I would not be so self-involved. It is so easy to sit around and cry over your song, to go back in your memory and bring up every little thing he did that made you feel good. These are ways that you comfort yourself in your pain, but you will have to dig your way out of this ditch and see the sunlight again.
You will first have to deal with the fact that he wants you back. You sound afraid that he will hurt you again. If that feeling is strong - then you can't go back. You have to find peace within yourself and you won't be able to do that pining away.
I encourage you to be strong, Get up and get moving in life. You don't have to jump into another relationship, but you have love to give others who need it. Do something special for yourself, Treat yourself well. Go places and train your mind to think positive about who you are - not about him and what he is doing. Again - this takes time, but you can do it. Have yourself a good cty and then throw away the tissues.....
2007-07-20 13:16:58 · answer #5 · answered by THE SINGER 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tough question. Sounds like your heart wants him but your head is saying no to the hurt he has caused you. I suggest listening to your head. Give it some time, sooner or later, the memories will fade somewhat. Get out of the house and enjoy life. Go out with friends, join a health club or do some church activities or just volunteer in your spare time to keep yourself busy. As each day goes, the hurt will be a little less. My heart goes out to you and wish I could help you in some way, but you have to make the decision. Good luck.
2007-07-20 13:15:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know it is realy hard. I just want you to know i have felt that way. Honestly you have to try to take your heart out of the situation. lepoards do not change there spots. once twice three times your out. You have the proff he has fooled around most people like me live a life never know. but if i knew the fact i would never go back. Its harder not to know. Men are born to play the field. You are not married so he is not commiting adultry. my old saying is this to shall pass. P.s.people like sex and if they know they can get it they will men need it regularly or they get blue ------
2007-07-20 13:22:17 · answer #7 · answered by gulible 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
did you know that you would fall in love so deep the day before you met him? no you didnt. you dont know what tomorow holds, but you know that you deserve better. you will probably be miserable if you go back anyways (always suspecting of him). you still hurt because you havent realized how much better you are then him. any guy would love to be with a girl who loves them like you loved him. and it also hurts that you havent found anyone you connect with yet. but you need to be stronger, trust yourself, trust that this is just the begining of a new chapter or you will be back in square one with this guy. dont look back look front.
2007-07-20 13:26:27 · answer #8 · answered by mimi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I went through the same exact feeling.... I just got over it too...
Your heart tells you to go back to him....
But your head tells you what he did.....
Best advice...continue on....not worth it......
2007-07-20 13:30:22 · answer #9 · answered by DJM 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
walk away ...keep walking...and NEVER look back....
2007-07-20 13:15:22 · answer #10 · answered by tee_girl 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋