well recently I found out that my firstborn son(40 years old) and the foundation for which my marriage was built on was named after my wife's high school ex-boyfriend, He wont allow me to have a blood test done to see if he is really my son, he said he would rather go on not knowing, so I decided that since she took my 40 year old son I will take her 40th anniversary away, I figure that I will just get her a really lame sweater(with a giraffe on it or something) or maybe a gift certificate for like 25 dollars and I wont even put her name on it. Or maybe I will just buy her a bunch of cheap china from the dollar store or something, I don't know, I just need some ideas, something that will make her think that I have a surprise gift but in actuality I wont!!!!! If she makes me question my marriage and the birth of my son I will make her question her marriage and her 40 years with me, its only fair
2007-07-20 10:52:40 · 15 answers · asked by james peters 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My best idea for a gift?
A new husband.
C'mon, your pissed about her naming your son the same thing as a guy who is probably fat and bald? Now you want to insinuate that the boy you rasied may well not be your own?
Sounds to me like there are a lot more problems going on here than just this, maybe you guys should nto plan on a 41st anniversary
2007-07-20 10:58:24 · answer #1 · answered by Michael H 7 · 5⤊ 1⤋
Get over it. Sperm donations do not make a man a father. If you feel this much spite toward your wife, then it is time to leave. The worst thing a human can do is to intentionally hurt someone else.
By the way "she" did not "take" your 40 year old son, but your words here and actions may push him away from you. You really need to think about this before you do anything hurtful. You might end up losing them both.
2007-07-20 11:00:47 · answer #2 · answered by nurse ratchet 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Best gift: marriage counseling.
When you say that your son "is the foundation for which my marriage was built" -- do you mean that you married her ONLY because she was pregnant? If you have stayed married for 40 years, that doesn't sound quite right.
Please don't put 40 years of marriage at risk by being petty on your anniversary. Please don't jeopardize your relationship with your son (who sounds like he views you as his one and only Dad, no matter what the tests might reveal).
Enlist the help of professional who can help you work through the shock and anger. You and your wife have already beaten the odds by being together all these years. Do you really want to die alone? Because that's where you're headed if you can't get over this hump.
2007-07-20 11:10:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Good God! Get a grip.....
After being a father for 40 years, do you really want to change the relationship with your son? He sure didn't do anything wrong.
Secondly - if your wife made a mistake 40 years ago, but has been a good wife since then, find a way to work on your feelings. Otherwise, pack your stuff and leave. No one's making you stay. And - your spiteful reaction can only hurt your entire family.
2007-07-20 10:58:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
60 something olds still play silly games??? If it will make you feel better go for it. I side with your son...Maybe he doesn't really care who is biological father is but considers you his father no matter what. Just because your son has the name of an ex high school boyfriend doesn't mean that you are not your son's father. I personally think you are being ridiculous. Just don't give her anything if you are that all broke up about things.
2007-07-20 11:01:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
One would think that after 40 years you MIGHT be mature...but I guess not. Being spiteful is childish, immature and shows a lack of character on your part. But if that's how you want the world to see you then by all means, act that way.
2007-07-20 12:20:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
buy her a rubber dog toy or something.Dude I can see your sons point but you also deserve to know the truth.Explain it to him that you want to know for yourself and nothing will change between you both and insure him that you will honor his wishes and not share the results with him.
My first true love named her son Matthew which also happens to be my name but thank god he wasn't born until 15 years after we split up.I was kind of weirded out when i ran into her and met her son but to each their own.maybe she just happened to like his name.
2007-07-20 11:28:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Christ... how horrible. i cant Imagine how you feel. I'm sorry. although I'm not sure childish revenge is such a smart move either. i mean don't cook her worst meal, served on that sh!tty dollar store china. with her least favorite music in the background. you wouldn't forget your table manners will you? and you definitely should not buy her that hideous sweater a much larger size. no no no and a 50th card would not be appropriate. ;)
2007-07-20 11:04:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
divorce papers delivered on the anniversary date makes a wonderful gift that will be long remembered and cherished.
2007-07-20 11:33:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow.... why in the world would you want to do that to the woman that you are supposed to love more than anything in the world? She made a mistake 40 YEARS ago, and you want to punish her for it now? Seems awfully harsh...
2007-07-20 10:57:22 · answer #10 · answered by Dena 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋