He's been divorced 4 years and she reeks all the havoc she can. We've been together since January and he wants to get married. His only child is 13 years old. I have never received child support but I know it can be a bear. What would you suggest? Last Friday, he was upset because $900 came out of his check. He says he pays $685.00 each month for one child.
2007-07-20 09:26:28 · 23 answers · asked by Steffie Love 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What was the $900 for if his child support is only $685? Was he late on last months payment? His ex will probably continue taking him to court every time she thinks he is making more money. If you do marry this man you must realize this is a package deal. He will always have a daughter and until she is 18, possibly older if attending college he will be supporting her, as it should be. If you love him the two of you will work it out......Just remember he had her first, and has a responsibility to her.
2007-07-20 09:40:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anais 4 · 6⤊ 1⤋
Sorry, but I just have to say it. Why is it people (men and women) don't mind creating children? But when the relationship breaks up...they don't feel that they should have to support their own kids!? If your boyfriend has a problem paying for the care and well being of his child, then he should have used protection. I would think twice about marrying this man. And if you do, think twice about having kids with him. If your marriage doesn't work out, he will be crying about having to pay support for your mutual child.
2007-07-20 09:52:47 · answer #2 · answered by Sophie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Actaully I know a guy that pays well over 900 a month for his child.Being that he is military he can't even fight it. I have a son I get 300 a month for him and it doesn't cover the cost of much...sounds like a lot but it really isn't. I have the option of getting around 800 a month but I choose not to because my ex hasn't so much as sent a b-day card to my son in 5 years so I don't want him back in my life. My son doesn't even remember him either.
2007-07-20 09:36:43 · answer #3 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop being selfish and remember that he had a family before you and will still have his daughter after you, I say this because your question seems more about you than his daughter. Like you're mad because he couldn't spend the money on YOU, BOO HOO!!!
He HAS to pay for the child he helped make, that's just common sense. The amount is up for the courts to decide and if extra was taken out, more than likely it is because he missed a payment.
2007-07-20 19:47:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has a court order to pay child support. This is between his ex wife and himself. Either put up with or get out of the relationship.
2007-07-20 09:30:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Stop seeing this as his ex-wife and start seeing this as his child. If you marry this man, this child will be your step-child. I've heard that it's based on a person's salary and if you're supposed to pay a certain amount then that it's what you're supposed to be able to afford based on your salary. Maybe I'm wrong. You said you never received child support. That's not a good thing and do not encourage your new man to stoop low. Encourage him to pay it even if it seems like a lot.
2007-07-20 09:31:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
if you play you pay, and that is not much money at all, you try and raise a kid on 685 a month, hell I pay 450 a month just for preschool alone! so i really can't feel sorry for you about that, but one thing I can tell you is you better think twice about marring this guy, once you guys are married you income will also be consider when determining support! in other words she will have legal recourse to after you income as well.
2007-07-20 09:40:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The state sets child support at 20% of your salary and that's pretty standard. If he owes back child support than it will be the 20% plus any back support he owes.
If he's paying too much then why didn't he go to court with her when it was changed and fight for his money? All he has to prove is his income and it will be based accordingly.
2007-07-20 09:29:40 · answer #8 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can sympathize. my husband's ex gets a check each time he gets a check-he gets bonuses here and there, she gets hers first even if he gets $0.
and there's really nothing you can do but get an attorney and ask for a modification as well. and you can also bring up in court the 'havoc' she reeks on him. the judge may see it as a hostile situation and threaten that he does not want to see her back in court again. this is what happened to myhusband's ex just 6 months ago. she divorced her 2nd husbaand and assumed that we would have to take up the extra slack for her. WRONG!! the child support remained the same AND she moved several times without tellling us so she now has to meet us halfway for visitation.
my ex took me back to court to have his payments lowered and owed me $5000 at the time. the judge ordered that the back pay that was due be forgiven plus he granted my ex the right to claim our youngest child on his taxes. if your boyfriend makes more money than his ex, it can also be in his favor becuase he si paying more taxes than she is and of course, its good for the legal system. both parents have an advantage, and a GOOD attorney makes a difference as well. my attorney at that time was, well I wont be using him again!
but the state uses a calculator to figure child support and like i said, unless you have a good attorney, thats probably what you'll have to pay.
http://www.alllaw.com/calculators/childsupport/
if you 2 get married, you're going to have to learn to bite your tongue and be prepared for tons of screwed up weekends and holidays.
honestly, even though i have children wtih my ex husband, i would have never remarried if i would have known the troubles we would have with my current husband's ex ANd his children. blended families are not easy and unless you're marrying prince charming-not worth it!!! especially when you're dealing with an ex wife that wants to contantly stir up the pot and not leave well enough alone. my husband's ex has his kids disrespecting me in the worst ways, sehs' always trying to control our weekends and holidays-such as she will intentionally spend her time she wants with the kids and for example-last christmas was his, but she called crying on the phone and i ended up spending christmas morning at home with my children but without my husband-he was ona 3 hour drive to pick up his kids. same thing happens for every holiday. i spend my holidays with my children at home while my husband's on teh road to get his children after they've spent the majority of the holiday doing what they and their mother wanted to do.
2007-07-22 22:15:00 · answer #9 · answered by *** 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL...well, that's life. Some men get away with not paying anything at all; some men don't escape it.
And funny how it's always the ex-wife who is always being unreasonable. Do you think it's easy raising a child, teenager none the less, by yourself?
2007-07-20 09:30:32 · answer #10 · answered by ron-D 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋