how i am i supposed to work and take care of my newborn?

Question

i am due to deliver my baby in november. day care is too expensive and i cant afford to stay home from work...i dont know what to do. i dont have any relatives that dont work so thats out. and i dont know how but i make too much money for gov. aid. what should i do?

i dont want to hear that i should have thought about that before getting pregnant! theres no point on dwelling on it now i just need to figure out what i am gonna do. so if your gonna be negative please just dont anwser the question.

Answer 1

if you have friends that dont work let the baby stay with them. maybe work a night shift or work sometime of the day when friends or relatives are not working.pick one of these either that or the only thing you CAN do is stay home.

Answer 2

Did you know that up until about 50 years ago, most women sat in bed being catered to for the first six weeks after birth even if they didn't have a c-section? This was for a reason. Your body is healing and it can best do that if you rest. You just had major surgery. Taking care of the newborn is all you should be doing right now. Someone else should be doing everything else plus helping with the baby. Call your mom or a friend to come help you out. And if 'dad' isn't actively helping, then yes he is taking advantage of you and the sooner you say something the better. I had a Cesarean with my last child and it was weeks before I had to do anything other than nurse the baby. My family (while a bit crazy) was great. My husband would even watch to make sure I didn't try to get too industrious on the days when I was feeling energetic so that I wouldn't feel totally wiped out the next day. You and your boyfriend need to have a very frank discussion about division of duties right now. And yes his share is to be much larger than yours. Your primary responsibility right now is resting and feeding the baby.

Answer 3

You haven't really given enough details such as the father of the baby's location. Have you been at your job long enough to have vacation time? This could allow you at least a couple of weeks to find a solution. If none of these pan out for you you might have to quit this job and go to a factory that pays more and has benefits. Do you attend church? Talk to someone there. You never know what people are willing to do to help strangers out when they need it. I commend you for needing to work but really girls this is why commitment and marriage are ideal, isn't it? Really though, good luck. Daycare assistance is a huge pain in Minnesota because there is like a 1-year waiting list and you can get kicked off at any time. When I had my daughter in daycare we were the only ones who did not get assistance even though my husband and I earned less than most of the couples there. Poverty is in the eye of the beholder. I'm sure that your rent would change along with the birth and should make up for the cost of daycare.

Answer 4

Just start asking everyone you know if they know of anyone you can trust that watches children or would be interested in watching children. Family childcare can be some of the worst so BE CAREFUL!! But maybe you can find someone like a stay at home mom interested in just watching one child and making a little extra money. Also check churches with child care centers and see if they have any programs that help with the cost. Also, how much money do you make a month.

Also research places that allow you to work from home or jobs you could do from home. Even if working from home pays less, when you take child care and other work related expenses (work clothes, gas, eating out) out of the equation you may end up making more from home and have the benefit of being with your baby.
Good luck and congratulations!!!

Answer 5

First Off...MrBrockBravo is an uninformed ignorant person. Aside from that...I'm in the same boat as you. I am also having a hard time with sitters. They are very expensive and not always trustworthy. I've heard too many bad things lately about child care facilities, I don't think I would dare send my child to one. I'm lucky enough to be able to take mine with me to work (an office). Most bosses are very helpful with that kind of thing. Maybe you should talk to your boss about that, at least until you can figure out your bills and such with the new addition to the household. Maybe you'll be able to afford daycare later on. Good Luck

Answer 6

I was in the same boat and some how we all 3 lived off of my boyfriends paycheck. A small $9.50/hr and accord to DSS, that is enough for a family of 3 when we all know that is next to impossible. I stayed home with my baby for a while and I was lucky enough to find an in home daycare that only charged me $100/week and the lady has 20 years experiance and state certified...try a yahoo search on in home daycares in your area. Even though $100 seems a lot to some people, if you look at what a daycare charges for a 6 week old you would blow chunks.

Answer 7

You mention daycare being too expensive, have you looked into individuals who babysit from their homes? I have both my children in a home daycare and she is much more affordable then a regular daycare and she only is allowed to watch 6 or 7 kids so I know mine are getting enough attention. My son has been with her for almost 4 1/2 yrs and my little girl has been with her for 4 months now. If you attend church you could ask around if anyone knows of any good babysitters or probably even call a church and explain that you're looking for a home babysitter; they may be able to help.

Another option (which you'd have to have a relative agree to) is for you to work a late shift - so one of your relatives could watch the baby during the night (hopefully the baby will sleep most of it), and you would be able to stay home with your baby during the day. Discuss this with your doctor and see if she has any ideas, you don't need to be stressing too much while you're carrying a baby.

You don't mention the baby's dad, and I don't want to presume he's not involved; if he is going to be involved maybe one of you could work days and the other nights. If he's not going to be involved physically then you need to make sure he pays child support, which would obviously be much needed. Good luck and congratulations!

Answer 8

Spend the money on a financial planner and find a way to make staying home work -because a financial planner can't change the cost of daycare nor how much you make an hour. A financial planner should be able to tell you if you can reasonably cut your expenses enough.

You should also look into ways of making money at home. You can baby sit other kids, you can do work at home jobs, or you can take in a roommate or an exchange student.

Answer 9

How you got to this situation is water under the bridge, honey. No sense in beating yourself up over that.

Can you get a roommate to share your place and the expenses? Do you have a friend who could help with day care? Have you looked into working at home--either a new job or doing your current job from a computer at home? Have you spoken with your employer to see if they have anything to offer in the way of help? Get busy now looking for alternative arrangements. What about the baby's dad? Aren't you entitled to child support from him?

Just a brainstorm of ideas, ignore me if you've heard them already.

Congratulations on your upcoming birth!
TX mom
debbie

Answer 10

Try talking to people from work maybe they have a trusted relative that baby sits or knows someone who doesn't charge allot, But I wouldn't go with a off the wall child care this is your most precious possession and as a new born they can not tell you what is going on when you leave, be wise.

Answer 11

If you have any experience working with children I would check into working either at a daycare where you would get a discount, or watching a couple kids at your house during the day. These are both good options, and the plus is that you would be able to see your baby during the day!