I am 18 years old,and a senior in high school. I was adopted out of my family when I was about a year old.I love both my adoptive parents,and biological parents so much.I see my biological parents a lot and they have said that they aren't the most proud of me for getting pregnant so young but they will help me out,and if I want I can move in with them.I also have a lot of great friends too.I have aunts,cousins,friends,moms,sisters,and sister-in-laws and no one has yet offered to pay for my baby shower.I am alright with it because this baby is my responsibility and I don't mind paying for things on my own.I have a couple jobs too.
So here I am 6 months along and have made mention to everyone several times how I much I would like to have one and still no offers.I am afraid that if I put one on by myself everyone will ask why I never asked them to put one on for me,but I don't want to be rude,or slight anyone.
Any suggestions?
Thanks.
(:
ps-please no criticism.
2007-07-20 05:43:46 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
The only thing tackier than someone hosting their own baby shower is someone who asks someone else to throw them a shower. I have been known to avoid bridal and baby showers in the past that were put on this way. You are still only 6 months and have a long way left to go... 16 more weeks to be exact. Plenty of time for someone to offer and plan. You also have to know too that your friends are young and you are probably the first one that they know to go through this so they might not exactly know how to go about this either.
And I hate to be the one to bring this up, but have you thought that since you are so young, your friends and family might not be comfortable with you being pregnant and so the idea of throwing or going to a baby shower for you is really uncomfortable for them too? I know that the idea of that sucks, but it is one of the harsh realities of teen pregnancy. I am not saying this to be mean at all, but just to make you aware of where these other people could be coming from. It is only in the past 10 years that the idea of a teen keeping their baby has been accepted at all and it is still not a very popular social belief. Even though people will advocate for womens rights, it becomes different when it is in their own circle. You have to realize that while this is "your situation" it does stronly affect the people around you in ways that you can't imagine. I don't know what to tell you as far as how to deal with that, but just know that no matter what your situation, you are never alone.
Good luck with everything! I am 6 months too, so it is kinda cool to talk to someone else who is in the same place. (Oh, and I haven't had a shower yet or any dates placed for a shower yet, So you're not alone in that either.)
2007-07-20 07:20:13 · answer #1 · answered by Krissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you still have some time, for one thing. Baby showers traditionally don't happen until the mom-to-be is in her 8th month or so. Secondly, most baby showers are surprises- so maybe they are planning something already but they want to surprise you. Either way, it's kind of bad form to ask for a baby shower. It's like asking for a birthday present, or something like that. I think it's nice that your family and friends are all supportive of you, and I'm sure someone, somewhere is planning a lovely shower for you. Have a nice day!
2007-07-20 06:03:01 · answer #2 · answered by fizzygurrl1980 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it's not really that they are "paying" for a baby shower for you. It's that they are hosting one. And it's not that difficult or a big deal for you to host your own. I think that surprise baby showers are not right, because here you are worrying about all the things you need to get still.
A suggestion to find out if it is a surprise one, take a few of your friends shopping and run down the baby aisles menitoning everything you still need. And then start grabbing, and see if they stop you. You'd get your answer from that.
2007-07-20 05:59:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, people usually wait a little longer to have a baby shower. I know you want to get some things ahead of time to see what you will need for the baby. Most often, with my friends, we have had the baby shower much closer to the due date. Someone will give you a shower; don't worry about that. Did you know that you can register for baby gifts at certain stores? Do that and when you buy something for the baby it will get crossed off the list. Then when you have your baby shower people will know what you want.
Congratulations on your baby.
2007-07-20 05:51:25 · answer #4 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are probally wanting to suprise you. I didn't get any of my babyshowers untill I was like 8-9 months pregnant. Some older peole believe that it is bad luck to do one before 6 months. Especially if you don't know 100% what you are having. I think you will you get one. They have talked about it. I am sure of it. It is your first baby so they will want to do one. I am sure it will come up again. If you are really concerned about it then ask someone if there are any plans for a baby shower. Look for clues like them asking when are you off and what you need for your baby. This is what my family does to me. Best wishes and congrats with baby.
2007-07-20 05:53:59 · answer #5 · answered by supermommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry; it doesn't have to be a big deal. Seems to me all you need to do is register whatever gifts / stuff you think you will need for you and your baby, and then let your family members know. If they're really so eager and willing to help you out, but nobody's offered to throw you a shower yet, then I'm sure they wouldn't mind knowing exactly what you need and getting it for you. If you want to do your shower yourself, it can be as simple as a small party with some snacks, beverages, and simple decorations. Simple as that!
2007-07-20 05:56:09 · answer #6 · answered by FunnyValentine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
idk if i would plan my own shower but maybe you can tell your mom you want to know if your having a shower so that you dont waste money on things yourself. or have your boyfriend try and find out from his side of the family. im really sorry that its happening cause that sounds horrible. so what if the economy is tough...your having a baby and your baby will be around no matter what the economy is like. i hope someone steps up and throws you a shower! good luck
2016-05-18 03:17:27 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am joining the surprise train here. They may very well be putting one together for you. If not, women don't always have baby showers. Keep that in mind :) It doesn't mean they don't care,it just means the presents come later. Buy the necessities yourself right now (let them know you are). Be sure you have your registry up and running. Also, as I said, buy a bassinet, play yard with the bassinet in it, etc.
2007-07-20 05:51:58 · answer #8 · answered by Harley 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe the first posters are right and someone is giving you a surprise shower. Definitely do not throw your own, it's not good taste. Also, they may be waiting to give you a shower after baby is born. Some people like those b/c they can see the baby.
2007-07-20 05:53:09 · answer #9 · answered by burfette 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You dont' have to have an actual shower. You can always go and register for things you need at, target or walmart, and then let your family and friends know that you're registered at such and such a store.
But it definitely could be a surprise, and most people don't have showers until after 6 months anyway. :)
2007-07-20 05:51:13 · answer #10 · answered by Special K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋