Pennsylvania Custody questions?

Question

I'm 20 yrs old and 6 months pregnant, the babies father and I are no longer together. He's in college, I'm still at home and working, and now that my son is on the way my education is on hold. I worry if I bring him to court or vise versa he'll get custody ONLY because he'll be more financially stable than I am. He lives about 6 hrs from me, and I'm worried he'll be able to just drive up and take him hrs away. Basically I have no idea what to do..

Answer 1

Start by calling childeren's services and getting some basic ideas about how the system works and some support help in place

Answer 2

Marie, I'm sorry you are going through this. I'm also in the middle of a visitation/shared custody proceedings. It's not a matter of the father trying to take my daughter, but to only set-up structured times for visitation. I also live in PA and I'm starting to see the laws regarding this. Let me tell you first off that the first and paramount sentiment is that a child belongs with it's mother. Every judge in the world would tell you that, women are born to nurture and raise and we house the child in our loins for a reason. Now, does that mean that men aren't fit to raise a child simply on the basis of being a man, no, it does not. For your ex to take the baby - legally - would mean that a judge has found you unfit. If you are living in squalor and the child would be in an unhealthy environment, then yes, that would be bad. But just because you are a struggling student, and a single mother to be, doesn't mean you are unfit. If you can provide a clean, stable home for your baby, you have nothing to worry about. If he's so nasty as to try and legally take the baby away, then a very real fear is that he will just "drive up and take the baby" illegally. But if he's grounded as you say, it will be hard for him to hide - the law should be able to get the baby back. And the good thing about that is, if he tries to kidnap the baby and they find him, his chances for shared custody are shot forever. No judge will give visitation rights to a man who's already tried to kidnap the baby. So rest easy, this stress, though a real concern, is not good for your unborn baby. Just concentrate on making a stable home for the baby and dont' worry. Another good thing to do is join a local church. Get super involved and then hide behind it. If the judge sees you as a productive member of society - despite your financial limitations - it will only help. Plus, the members will shelter you and you can ask the pastor to speak on your behalf at the custody hearing. I know it sounds as if I'm saying for you to "use" the church...but seriously, that's what they are there for. God says in his bible that everything we need should be found in His house. Good luck and God Bless.

Answer 3

Are you in a stable environment? Has the father tried to keep in touch with you or offered to help pay for the medical expenses? All of this will be taken into consideration. More than likely you will retain custody simply because you are the mother.

Answer 4

naw..the court will go with you because you are the mother, it is ok that he is more financially stable. But he is also in college and what are the chances that he would really take the baby?

You are at home and working...that is honestly the best place for the new baby. Don't worry, if he gets anything, it will be visitation rights

Answer 5

Your child has the right to receive financial support from the father. The father, in turn, has the right to be involved in his child's life.

You need to establish paternity and seek child support as soon as the baby is born. There is no danger of the ex getting custody as long as you are a fit parent and properly caring for your baby.

My sister was in a similar situation with her ex after the birth of their daughters. The ex and his grandmother made many threats and had her scared to death to seek support. She ended up having to seek state aid and the state of Michigan requires the custodial parent to seek child support to receive aid. She filed the papers with Friend of the Court and guess what? He was denied custody and because of his threats he was considered a flight risk. So, the courts gave him supervised visitation only.

You owe it to your child and yourself to get the support from the father that you are owed and to continue your education. Babies are more expensive than you realize and you have a duty to provide for your baby.

Answer 6

The father has rights to that child. Get a lawyer and get court papers signed so you can get it over with. This way you can get child support, visitation, and custody all settled. If you don't trust this man, why did you spread your legs for him and agree to have unprotected sex that may end in pregnancy without a permanent commitment like marriage?

Answer 7

SIMPLE

I had a baby in central pa, they just told me NOT to have him sign the paternity papers.

They wont even bring it up (the nurses) if you tell them not to, and since he doents have other kids, he wont even know the difference.

This will make it so that he has NO rights. If you DONT want to do this, you must wait untill birth, and immeadiatley file for custody, but you cannot live together....try this site: www.palawhelp.org

Answer 8

GET A LAWYER!!!!! I don't know about Penn. but most states won't relinquish mothers rights on a whim. If he gets the child the go to school and get better educated than he is and take him back to court.

Answer 9

if you have a job, and some type of home, and a clean record, i dont see why they would give him custody. Hes in college? i dont think he would even want the baby, honestly

Answer 10

well you should file child support on him, make him pay, he cannot get custody unless you are an unfit mother, (on drugs, neglecting child, etc.,) so, file support, he will probably ask for a DNA test, and since he makes more, he will have to pay, probably a percentage of wages, you can still go to school, and pay for day care.