How to start a conversation?

Question

I'm quite quiet but not shy. Just don't know how to start a conversation with anyone. When someone asked me a question, I cannot make further conversation after "ÿes/no/I think so" (too short answer & stop). I don't know what should I say next? In a group of conversations, seems I mostly a listening person in the group. I don't like to be like this, too boring. Anyone has an idea to improve my communication skill.

Answer 1

While gabbers may get a lot a attention - in the long run the people that are most often treasurered are the listeners.
It sounds like you naturally have good listening skills so work on making them even better.
1)There is a skill called active listening... - It is were you trullly consentrate on what the other person is saying and not worrying about how you will respond. Then when the conversational ball comes back to you - you ask a question for clarification of what the other person said.
If a friend said "Mike called me last night and was all Like do you like to go to the movies and I don't know if he was trying to ask me out" You might respond with "Do you think you would enjoy going on a date to the movies with Mike?" This lets your friend know you where listening to her about Mike and the movies and she has to respond about her feeling about dating Mike.
Most people like to talk about themselves so if you support that - you are not considered boring - because they are thrilled to "share" so much with you. Meanwhile you can learn alot that way.
2) Clarify for yourself the whys of what you believe and think. Then if you are asked a question you can give more than just a yes or no answer. If the converstion is politics and the question is "Do you think Hilary would make a good President?" An answer of yes of no or short comment about her husband is not nearly as engaging as as Statement like "I believe she would make a good President becuase of her experience in Goverement, her ideas on health care, and social programs" or "I do not believe She would make a good President because she is too liberal and her social programs will increase taxes while not solving the root problems".
3) Find your passion. Anyone can speak better on an issue that they care about. Identify what you trully care about and then work on expanding your knowledge, in that area. This will do two things - a) Help you have more things to say about an area you care about & b) Increase the chances that you will be able to have conversations with persons that also share your interests and therefore will treasure your views.
I once, before smoking was banned in college class rooms, had to give a talk in front of the class. Because my eyes were red and swollen each day after class from the smoke that many of my classmates where blelching, I decided to give my talk on "the dangers of Second Hand smoke" Many of my fellow students did not like the talk - but the teacher was very impressed because I was one of the few students that talked about there issue with true caring.

Answer 2

You might be shy, but you probably have a core group of friends that you can REALLY open up to.

I don't consider myself shy at all and am usually the center of attention at parties. Before you get there kind of psyche yourself up like you would do for a job interview.

Try to think of relevant questions and entertaining answers for every scenario. Conversing is REALLY fun once you get the hang of it. Having a conversation is just like any subject in school, or like WORKING OUT.

THE MORE YOU DO SOMETHING, THE BETTER YOU ARE AT IT.

Practice in front of a mirror saying things like

"Hi!, what is your (occupation/spouse doing these days/interests etc...)

"How interesting! Whats that like?"

No matter what people just want someone to talk to.

Answer 3

listen to what others are saying and give your imput you'd be surprised at yourself and others for listening to you. if your shy with groups then try conversations with family members or a best friend. talk about things you know and are familiar with thats a starting point. talk about what you did over the weekend or summer for fun ask what their favorite vacation spot is and go from there.

Answer 4

I will start a conversation.

Answer 5

a few months ago, i was in your position. when i decided i wanted to change, i used self-hypnotism to progress my communications skills. when i looked on websites i thought it was stupid but then thought it won't hurt to try. anyway, i tried it and it has worked around 50% where i can have a conversation longer than one words. sometimes it doesn't work for other people but it has made my life more easier.

Answer 6

In my experience sometimes I cannot enjoyed to the conversations with my cousins and even my aunt and I'll felt offended and out of placed of them and I'll tried to joined with them,but I can't do it and I think we could not the understand about the conversations and like you when they told about their questions but I felt to shy of my answered and I think were not being mature enough yet.Sometimes my aunt was shared me about her love life and her friends and I'm listen to her stories and I'm shared also to her about my experience in my life and apparently I'm not a serious person talked with her about it and also to my mom.I think we should think about it and then to e-mail them or texting the message of our mobile phone and the communication is a very important and how to communicate with the other people and For me I'll tried to tried to myself to joined them in their group conversations and I prayed to myself for giving me a lot of strength for the giving me a sign for the joining with them.

Answer 7

Mixing in with groups, going to partys if your one of those type of girls or going out with your friends to a party, just be your self, people dont like it sod em !!

Answer 8

go out and do things that you like or know about. That way if you want to talk to someone, its about something you like and you will be able to say more than yes or no.

Answer 9

yesss...i was like that. now im like so out there. because the quiet u r ...the more people r gonna think of u weird. so just break out of ur shelll like i did..cuz no one knows if ur shy or not cuz they dont know the reallll you so pretend ur this person whos tottaly out there. it worked for me=:) hope it works for you good luck!

Answer 10

never force yourself or pretend to be someone you dont to listen to us is what we women want so you are ideal