What effects a child's self-esteem and does it last their whole life?

Question

I remember feeling very ugly when i was younger.. i was chubby so kids would call me a fatty and i was pressured to exercise by my parents. I still have self-esteem issues and i look a lot differently than I used to. Sooo, does your childhood effect your self-esteem or is it something you are born with?

Answer 1

Calling a child stupid! Calling kid names or degrading them!

Answer 2

Most definitely. The events in your childhood directly affect your self-esteem. Most of which I think is directly related to the relationship between parents and their children because this is where a child first learns about human interaction. If a parent no matter what praises a child, then that child would grow to have confidence and high self-esteem because it has been shown to develop self worth. If a parent neglects or disregards a child, or worse yet puts down or adds on to the pressures a child may already feel then that child will inevitably have low self-esteem.

We have all seen how the most beautiful of people can have self-esteem that pales in comparison to a person who is not as attractive. We've seen this growing up in school and in the media.

Answer 3

Around the ages of 2-3 years of age children try out their independents. If a parent praises that childs attempt at independence he/she develops high self-esteem, but if that parent is too harsh and yells at the child he/she will develop very low self-esteem, shame and doubt. This in turn can lead to other psychological problems and lasts throughout life.

Answer 4

Hi,

both effin and Ray are right. Children are first of all curious and a living question mark. They want answers and are looking for them all over their world.
If the answers they get are encouraging (praise, encouragement, attention, a positive resonance of any kind) they feel they are "worth" something = self esteem.
If they are neglected, unattended, put down, hurt or whatever, they feel deficient or unworthy and develop little self esteem.

A newborn baby doesn't have self esteem, it has needs. It wants them fulfilled. If it gets what it wants, it will eventually learn : "Hey, if I do this or that, I get what I want." And that amounts to something like self esteem. If it doesn't, it learns "Hey, I can do whatever I want, but it doesn't get me anywhere" -- and as soon as the kid is old enough to make comparisons ("but this one gets what he wants, hey and that one is more beautiful than me") it develops low self esteem.

No, we are not born with self esteem which is then destroyed. We are born without and have to build it up.

Unfortunately. Because that is where we are so dependent on our surroundings.

The good news is: as soon as we are old enough, we can also work on it.

So good luck to you all,
you're great!
Anna

Answer 5

I was very skinny, and i didn`t fit in with anyone, i got bullied.

I felt ugly, it did affect me until i was 18, then i girls became interested in me, and its never been a problem since.

When i was skinny no-one liked me.

My self esteem is ok, i dont give a stuff what narrow minded people think now, and generally, i`d give as good as i get or better from people if they said anything bad to me.

If anything, its made me more tough, not that i`m nasty, but i`ll stand up as best i can, you have to don`t you?

Its all in the mind, i said to myself, why the hell should i feel low about myself, who the hell are these people to judge and treat me like that.

People who treat anyone like that, you know what they are?

The lowest of the low.

I personally dont feel like its inherent when born.