hi...i'm a 19 yr old girl. i stay in a hostel away from my home. we guys at the uni have nights out every weekend. once i met this guy over one such weekend and we had a fling...just a one-night stand. i didn't even look back at that chapter in my life. last week my i went home and my elder sister introduced me to her fiance. she was keeping it a tight secret from me. i got more that a surprise! it was the same guy...omg i couldn't believe it. and he was so cool about it. he shook hands and told everyone that we met had once. my family and sister were so glad about it. i felt so awkward. i have a feeling he knew i was his fiancee's sis even before my sis introduced us. how could he be so cool about it? i feel so queer.....he's gonna be my bro-in-law and i have to be in touch for an entire lifetime. i can't even confide in anyone over this. wat do i do? this is really awkward for me. i'm back in my uni hostel now and everytime i talk to my sis i feel so so so awkward.
2007-07-19 05:12:30 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I disagree with everyone else about this. There's no need for her to know. It's only going to cause her problems with her relationship, and there is no need.
2007-07-19 05:21:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You didn't say clearly if this "fling" happened while your sis was dating this guy or not.
If she was when?
At which stage of the relationship? When they first met? or like last month?
Either way - keep this to yourself!
It would only hurt your sister to find this out now.
Obviously there wasn't some big romance between the two of you...it was just two body parts passing in the night.
The only thing that I would do is take this guy aside and tell him that if you ever suspect that he is cheating on her. Your going to spill the beans about the two of you.
Also ask him what the status of their relationship was when the two of you had your fling.
That is the million dollar question.
If they were really serious then
perhaps
you could save your sister alot of grief and tell her before they get hitched.
your call depending on the circumstances.
Good luck and don't feel "guilty" you are the innocent party here.
2007-07-19 05:23:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Somebody is getting dumped today. That guy really messed up by getting involved with your sister. The truth will come out eventually and somebody is in trouble...and it aint you. Who cares if he's cool with it. Tell your sister. The quicker the better. Would you want your sis to tell you she had slept with your fiance? Especially before there's a wedding. Gosh!
2007-07-19 05:25:32 · answer #3 · answered by 12th 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
How were you and your sister raised, What's your relationship like? What would happen if she finds out later?
Do you think she could blow it off as a casual mistake from the past? I tend to lean toward CraigC's advise, but you know your family dynamics and that has a lot to do with your decision.
2007-07-19 05:40:18 · answer #4 · answered by Bentley 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you must come clean with her jess.
It's imperitive that she know what happened and that you didn't have any knowledge of his relationship with you.
Your sis just might be a little pissed with you right at the first, but when, and if, she confronts her fiance, then she'll begin to see that you were, in fact, innocent.
But, i can't stress enough to come clean with her. She is about to make a choice that will affect both of your lives at the same time. She deserves, by you, to know what kind of guy this is. If he did it once, there's a strong possibility that he will do it again.
I implore you to tell her exactly what happend from your perspective.
2007-07-19 05:19:17 · answer #5 · answered by Lilium Inter Spinas 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
This is a tough one but remember neither of you did anything wrong!!! So you slept with him it happens. I would try to talk to him about it and see if he wants to be open with what happened. But some time there are things that are best left untold because of the damage it could do. But I would definitely get him one on one and talk to him about it!
2007-07-19 05:26:12 · answer #6 · answered by mrjamfy 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i dont think there is no reason to tell ur sister if it was before they were together.. I would talk to the guy and make sure you both are in agreement and see if he is really commited to ur sister. Why hurt her?? Neither of u did anything to hurt her...Its not gonna happen again so whats the point.. let her be happy.
2007-07-19 05:22:56 · answer #7 · answered by cece715 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think that now there is no better time to possibly get your sister and her man friend into bed. I mean sure, at first it might be weird, but in long run you will be a winner.
2007-07-19 05:21:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell her now, but tell her you got tickets to the Maury Show.
Then call 1-888-45MAURY
or 1-888-456-2879
Tell her on the show so I can watch and laugh.
2007-07-19 05:21:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you mean you can't confide in anyone regarding this awkward situation? You just did - with the entire Answers community...!
2007-07-19 05:18:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not want to sound mean, but let's face it, you were a One Night Stand! Is your ego that big that you think he slept with you because he is engaged to your sister. Move on! If he tries to make moves on you after he's married to your sister, then and only then do you tell your sister.
2007-07-19 05:22:24 · answer #11 · answered by CRAIG C 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋