How do I get my husband to love me again?

Question

My husband and I have been together for 4 years. We just got married on MAy 26, 2007. However, It feels like all we do is ***** ***** *****. Were happy together for a few hours sometimes a few days. But then its right down the drain over something so freekin stupid. Then were back to bitchiing at eachother again. Its just freekin crazy. We should still be in the "Newly Wed stage" But yeah right!!!!! We maybe have sex what once or twice a MONTH. Come on now. And we just got back home from our Honeymoon yesterday. Well on our honeymoon we got into it b/c he wouldn't let me go for a walk down a strange street alone. Well back up a bit i walked out b/c I was trying to get sexual with him and i felt he wanted nothign to do with it or me. So i said I am horney i am goign for a walk. Meanning to clear my head and just relaxe. But nope he had to chase me down. and you know what the next thing was. a screamming match on comming home to get a devorice.

In the heat of this argument he come out with that i have never looked good in a dress and he could look better then me any day. He doesn't like my attitude ither. Oh yes and the one that still , still is pissing me off at the moment is him talking **** about my parents. Not once saying sorry, when the argument was done all he sais is "you know i didn't mean it." Well you know what that isn't saying sorry. I want to hear him say he's sorry. Well anyways we argueed for a while and i walked out and he chased after me and then we came back to the room had sex. Which of course as soon as he cums **** if i came or not hes done and jumps right off me. I have no say in the matter. And i'm not aloud to have any toys b/c he says so. WTF, I'm feeling like a freekin slave child. Well anyways, we come home everything is fine untill i hit my head. So we start at it again. Well we calmed down and i started watching my "Talk Sex" Show on tv. Well i asked him one of the questions from the show.

I asked him is I give him good oral sex/plessure. He asked if i wanted to truth. Of course i said yes, So he said NO!!!! He said i have never pleased him Oraly.....again WTF. I asked him what i can do to be better and he said he's not goign to tell me b/c i don't do it enough to care. Then he had the balls to tell me later on that Oral sex is only good from strangers b/c you get it then you get rid of them. WTF? So lets see, I don't know how to dress, I can't give oral, i obviously don't please him sexualy, and he says we spent way to much time together this week. He said i have been at his hip to much. Well ****, We were on our F'in Honeymoon. Your suposta have a great LOVABLE time together. not apart. I want him to love me again. I want to have the candel lit dinners we used to have, the romantic music and candles in the room when we made love. I want to go back to what we were when we first started dating. He said he only married me b/c he thought i would stop bitching.

I love him alot. I mean Why else be with someone unless you have feelings for them? But i just get so pisse doff at him childish behaviour and not beign romantic anymore and only into his ******* video games. He doesn't like to clean our hous eis a mess unless i get up and freekin clean it. He is a pig seriously. I hate cleanning up after someone who doesn't clean up after them selves everyday. I'm sorry but if you drop food on the floor pick it up right away. If you spill milk or kool-aid on the counter clean it up. My goodness is it really that hard for men to understand that? Or is it just my husband? As we speek dishes need to be done. close need to be hung up, floors need to be swept,windows need to be washed, paperwork needs to be filed, dusting needs to get done, everything white needs to get whiped down and scrubed, floors need to be moped, the lawn needs to be mowed, the agrden needs to be weeded and watered

And guess what it won't get done til I/ME/I/ME get around to it. b/c he will get up mow the lawn then sit in front of the dang TV till ither he wants to go get a diffrent video game, wants food, thinks of somethign to put on his car, or a friend desides to give him a call. I want him to help out more and he doesn't unstand that. I'm sorry if most Married ppl have the realtionship where the woman does all this work herself and works a full time job and takes care of the kids well their husband only mows the lawn and works on the cars. But To me a marraige and a relationship is 50/50. And I will keep putting up a ***** (stink) untill he learns that I'm not a ******* maid, I'm not a house wife. Its 50/50 or i don't touch a dam thing ever again that he messes up EVER. I think thats why he doesn't love me b/c i won't be his *****. Well i'm sorry but i'm not that kinda woman. And A man that doesn't want sex and says my begginf for it is a turn off. Well screw off, B/c thats a line of BULL.

Answer 1

Oh hunny! I wish you would have said something the other day when you were over. I am always here if you need to talk. It sounds like you guys are just going through a tough time. Sometimes that happens. Has it been like this since you moved in together? If so then maybe you should consider counseling. I know that he isn't going to like that suggestion but it will help. Me and my husband did counseling, it did help us get through some of the stuff that we have been through. We still have some problems but I know that most marriages have problems. It will take time and effort from both of you if you want it to work out. Let me know if you want to talk sometime. I feel awful for you. Please don't be afraid to talk to me!

Answer 2

My goodness I think there is issues there on both sides. To say Im horny Im going for a walk down a strange street what would you think, I think you wanted him to react and because he didnt react in the way you thought he would you guys had a fight. Marriage isnt easy and you guys must have had the same issues you had before getting married what made you think walking down the isle signing a piece of paper would change who you guys are as people it doesnt. Get some counselling.


i just read your millions of add ons and if you dont like it then LEAVE this is the rest of your life if you dont like seeing that this is it til you die LEAVE he isnt going to change cause by you standing there and allowing him to treat you this way you are agreeing to him doing it. I would walk out what have you got to lose either he will suck up and try to change or hell let you go and then you can find someone who enjoys your oral sex lol. Good Luck

Answer 3

Well. after having been with him for 4 yrs you should have seen some of these traits before marriage. I've been with my guy 5 yrs, and I refuse to marry altho he wants to . When you see traits you don't like you need to assess the situation and find out if its tolerable for you. If not, it's time to go. If you stay and put up, he gets the idea it's alright to treat you that way.

So now you are married. You still need to assess and see if you want to stay or go. If you want to stay, I would suggest counseling that might help you both learn a different way to communicate your feelings rather than a fight. Good luck to you.

Answer 4

Make an appointment with a marriage counselor. Ask your husband to come again with you yet do not mean that it particularly is approximately his or your cheating. only clarify this is to develope better communique skills & an information which will supply help to the two rediscover your love. If he refuses to go, do not instruct any indicators of conceitedness yet proceed to ask him to come again with you via fact the day approaches. He would go the final minute. exchange your cell telephone numbers and don't make the comparable mistake two times. quit pointing out the bartender or the different woman. If not something is working, make an appointment with him for you 2 to sit down down and talk. once you do, talk approximately saving your marriage & counseling. or you will proceed living this manner mutually as your existence passes you by ability of. solid success.

Answer 5

Honey you have serious problems. Sad to say, if all this is jumping off now, within months you will be headed for divorce court. There is an ol saying...why buy milk from cow when you are getting it for free. The truth of the matter is, he truly does not love you nor does he respect you. You gave too much too soon and now you are suffering the conquences of bad choices. There is not much else to say. I wish you well.

Answer 6

In my opinion your husband loves you. I can understand why he didnt want you to walk down a strange street in a strange place by yourself. Sometimes when we get married we have this fairytail image of what our marriage is or not suppose to be. When it dosen't meet those expectations we get disappointed and think that the other person is cheating or dosen't love you. Marriage is a wonderful thing that takes time getting use to. You have to get use to their way of living as well as them getting use to yours. What i propose you both do is to sit down and TALK not yell. Find out what is going on with the both of you . COMMUNICATION is the key to a good relationship and be understanding and not defensive when each other talks and most of all listen to what the other has to say not hear them

Answer 7

The question you posted is "How do I get my husband to love me again?" And you write a book complaining about every little thing about him.

If you want him to love you again stop nagging about every little thing. It sounds like if he doesn't behave the way you think he should you get pissed off.

It's obvious that if you don't change your attitude it's gonna be a rocky road.

You've been married not even two months and are already on here talking about him like a dog. I feel sorry for him.

Answer 8

I think time apart is what y'all need i did it to my husband i st oped talking and dint see him four a whole week on the six day he was begging to be with me and his kids again and we've Ben married for 13yrs now we love each other more and appreciate each other Its hard but wen you love some one you don't give up don't get me wrong every one disagrees no one is perfect but let him go and if he comes back it was meant to be if he do sent your better off girl trust me

Answer 9

Read and watch ¨The Secret¨.
Second, if you know him for 4 years, you should´ve know that he is a pig and in that case and knowing that he didn´t change, you shouldn´t have married him.

For what I read, one of the problems in your relationship is the lack of communication. You have to explain him how you feel and what you are thinking. I know that it´s hard but TRY not to yell. If after 2 months nothing changes, I suggest you guys get a marriage conselor or divorce.

Answer 10

how can any guy not enjoy oral sex from a woman..lol...sounds like you need to find someone else babes. good luck.