sex yet for a another 4 weeks with all the heeling i have to do so i tryed to get my husband to just kiss me and hold me and he wont i dont know what is wrong with him i cant even get him to look at me it amkes me feel so bad that im starting to think he cheating on me. what should i do say somthing to him or just wait it out?
2007-07-18 10:29:50 · 25 answers · asked by michelle 2 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
A lot of times husbands have a hard time adjusting to having a sex life after a baby, too. After they have seen you give birth in all its glory and then watched you breast-feed and care for the baby, they feel guilty looking at you in a sexual way. It begins to make them uncomfortable. It's just as normal as a woman having hormone fluctuations and crying right after having a baby. You both just need time to adjust. You might also be suffering from a little bit of postpartum depression. My suggestion is to talk to your husband about it but don't pressure him to do anything. You will both feel more comfortable being romantic or affectionate after a little bit of time.
2007-07-18 10:37:01 · answer #1 · answered by shksprsis 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
YOu muswt try this officiallpy. break up criminal professional and sue dfor divorce and get a court docket ordered DNA attempt to instruct she isn;t tyours. TGhat is the only wiay you will no longer could paqy forverer tfor the recent toddler. Asd for toddler a million, I;d have the criminal professional additionally make a factor of goling into court docket and chanrge spouse with fraud for the 1st toddler, and insist she amdit to who the dad is and ask decide to required DMNA testing to launch you from the fiorst toddler too. you're needy. you don't understand a thank you to love in a mature way. in any different case, you've got been long gone an extremely long term in the past. additionally do no longer blow up at spouse. the certainty is she has some undiagnosed sexual ailment and psychological ailments, yet do no longer tell HER. She quite could proceed this development. She can not help her impulses and you mustm, to your sanity, get out of this finished concern and view it a foul dream. learn how to grive this by way of examining up on 'The Mourning technique'. while you're drawn back to her, do no longer bypass. Cry, have stonace ahckes, yet improve up. I;ve been the place you;ve been and that's an unsightly self punishment to be with an adulterrer. She can even have AISDS< VD OR HERPES. sell off HER perpetually.
2016-10-09 00:36:06 · answer #2 · answered by lumley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would tell him point blank how you feel. I would also remind him that after childbirth our emotions can be up and down and his responsibility to you and YOUR baby is to help keep you content. The baby will be more peaceful if you are happy, and the best gift you can give to that baby is a happy momma.
Ask him what his problem is, and tell him that his behaviour is a GREAT way to treat the mother of HIS baby, who just brought his offspring into the world.
Maybe he needs a reality check.
***whatever CHANGE he might be going through is nothing compared to what you are going through physically OR emotionally... Not even close. YES men have to adjust to being fathers BUT that's a process he should have gone through for the most part PRIOR to the baby arriving and in NO way excuses his current behavior. Men are paternal, we are maternal. His lack of consideration is inexcusable. In my opinion, not to mention immature.
****** Grrrrrrr.....And to all the people talking about satisfying HIM in some "other ways" while you heal? WTH... that's ignorant and even MORE inconsiderate. After childbirth especially in the 1st 6 weeks you are recovering physically, from losing LOTS of blood, and your vagina HURTS like hell. If you're nursing your breasts can be sensitive and sore initially, and the VERY VERY last thing I had on my mind was anything sexual. Not one cell in my body felt SEXUAL at first.... After all all my sexual parts hurt. I was tired, hormonally a mess, getting little sleep, and if I had 20-30 min to spare it sure as heck wouldn't have been on pleasing my husband sexually. He could wait, and he did. He was considerate enough to understand how I must feel. Gimme a large break, like a man can't deal with no sex for 6 weeks?? Sad... don't believe that nonsense. LOL wow.
Best wishes love.
2007-07-18 10:34:42 · answer #3 · answered by ™Tootsie 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
He might have misconceptions about just what he can do with you at this point. He might think that he cannot touch you in other ways, like it will hurt you in some way.
No reason you two can't be intimate in other ways. Let him know that you want to be with him and please him, even if a certain area is "off limits" for a little while.
He might be struggling with his new role also.
Talk to him! No blame or accusations. Just tell him how you want to be with him and need his touch. Ask him why he seems uncomfortable.
Communication. Don't just wait it out.
2007-07-18 12:48:11 · answer #4 · answered by joyh 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is serious. He should be giving you all kinds of support and letting you use your hands on him, at the very least. Some men feel really odd around you when they see your breasts being used to feed a human child. He may be jealous of the time you are spending with the baby. He also knows his jealously is uncalled for and ridiculous. You need to take care of your child. I have a suggestion, though. Get your mother or sister or his mother or sister to come watch the baby for a couple hours and go out to dinner with just your hubby. That should cheer him up. Tell him how you feel, by the way. See what he has to say for himself.
2007-07-18 10:34:41 · answer #5 · answered by Wiser1 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Did he watch the birth? It impacts some men differently. A new baby also puts a physical drain on new parents, lack of sleep, big change of routine, etc. You may be reading more into it than is really there.
Possibly postpartum on your part as well, talk to your doctor, and talk to your husband, don't let it fester.
2007-07-18 10:35:06 · answer #6 · answered by Bob-O 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
WELL SWEETIE U REALLY NEED 2 TALK 2 HIM AND THEN YOU'LL KNOW WHATZ GOING ON. MAYBE HE DOESN'T WANT 2 TOUCH U AT ALL CUZ ULTIMATELY HE CAN'T HAVE U. TALK 2 HIM, MAYBE U CAN TRY SOMETHING ELSE, U CAN'T HAVE INTERCOURSE, BUT MAYBE HE CAN UH........... OKAY I'M JUST GONNA SAY IT, I'M NOT TRYING 2 BE DIRTY ( I KNOW SOME WOULD SAY IT'S DIRTY 2 TALK ABOUT SEX, BUT I'M AN OPEN BOOK, THERE'S NO SHAME AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED).
MAYBE U CAN USE UR HAND OR ORALLY SATISFY HIS NEEDS AND THE CAN USE HIS HAND VERY CAREFULLY ON U, NO PENETRATION OF COURSE. AND HELL GIRL IF HE DOESN'T WANT 2 SATISFY UR NEEDS PURCHASE A SEX TOY, NOT A DILDO, BUT ONE OF THOSE "BULLETS" IT'S A SMALL EGG SHAPPED THINGY AND U DON'T HAVE 2 INSERT IT. MESSAGE ME AND I CAN GO INTO MORE DETAIL SWEETIE.
I'M NOT SURE IF UR FEELING LONELY LIKE I JUST NEED U 2 HOLD ME AND HUG ME OR IF U REALLY MEAN UR SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED. SO............... GOOD LUCK SWEETIE, TALK 2 HIM. HE IS UR HUSBAND AND HE SHOULD BE THERE 4 U. IF HE REFUSES THEN TAKE ANOTHER COURSE OF ACTION. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.
2007-07-18 10:41:31 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
If you can't have him in you there then give him a little something else where... to guy a BJ is desirable cuz its warm and moist and the motion and your tongue another option if you don't do that is to pleasure him he maybe feels undesirable to you cuz your in pain doesn't want to hurt you or feels rejected cuz having a baby puts a lot of strain on... you don't need to ask if he's cheating but show him you love him by more than intercourse maybe a little fun in the shower or something to show intimacy
2007-07-18 10:39:50 · answer #8 · answered by Ziff 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
He's your husband and you should be able to reasonably talk it out with him.
Men think differently than women. In their minds, it's all or nothing...that's just how they are. Sometimes they need to be reminded that women desire affection and intimacy even when it can't lead to sex. They are just dense!
You shouldn't worry to much.
2007-07-18 10:35:26 · answer #9 · answered by Hokie_Pokey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he probably feeling left out. and when you're ready to cuddle he's not. You are on a totally different schedule now. Just talk. Communication is the key. Your hormones are kicking your tail.
2007-07-18 10:41:11 · answer #10 · answered by Mekia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋