i love my best friend i just don't love what she does and if she keeps it up she can get really hurt and i have no idea how to tell her
2007-07-17 11:16:33 · 10 answers · asked by rosefire 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Just Tell Her Straight Out..
Unless U Want TO WAIT UNTIL SHE HURTS HERSELF!!!! I Suggest you tell her as soon as possible before anything happens.
2007-07-17 11:29:20 · answer #1 · answered by JustLiz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are the classic "enabler" in an addiction scenario. By giving them unconditional love, even when it means standing by and watching them destroy themselves, you are actually enabling them to follow that path. You are contributing to their downfall.
You need to sit down and tell her how her behavior is affecting YOU, and how it hurts you so much to see her do these things. And you have to make it clear and in no uncertain terms that your friendship cannot continue unless she accepts help or otherwise recognizes that what she is doing is wrong. If she will reach out to you for help, you will do everything you possibly can to help her, because you love her. But, if she dismisses your love and choses instead to continue the self-destructive behavior, then you will no longer be able to be her friend. NOT because you don't love her, but because you DO love her, and because her behavior causes you great pain and misery. You love who she IS and she is choosing to KILL the person that you love, and if that's how it's going to be, you cannot continue to stand by and watch helplessly while a good friend slowly dies before your eyes.
If you need help making this ultimatum, contact any local social services group that specializes in addiction or self-destructive behavior. They will help you understand more about your unwitting role in their behavior and how you can truly help them.
2007-07-17 18:31:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on what it is that she's doing.
If she's literally placing herself in real danger, confront her and make sure you make it clear that you're bringing it up because you love her. If she doesn't listen, her parents might need to know.
If the hurt she's setting herself up for is more like a "life lesson", sometimes people need to get hurt to learn that lesson - she could feel like you're judging her.
2007-07-17 18:34:53 · answer #3 · answered by mrscjr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the least painful and maybe the most effective is to ask her:
" if you thought i was in danger or doing something wrong, what would you do."?????
after she answers and most likely she is going to say she would help you. then you can tell her what it is you want to say.. but try to be as sensitive as possible. let her know you are her best friend and you are very afraid for her etc etc.
2007-07-17 20:56:00 · answer #4 · answered by ramni222 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should talk to her and if she gets mad and decides not to be your friend ( then she isn't ur friend ). My friend was nasty and taped a nasty thing on my camera so i got pissed and told him I'm not his friend and it's the right choice!
2007-07-17 18:28:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know what nit is, but it is always best to just say instead of finding them in a ditch dead....
2007-07-17 18:19:29 · answer #6 · answered by Lovie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love her then you'll tell her.
You can say just about anything to people.....it's how you say it that counts.
2007-07-17 18:19:24 · answer #7 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
THAT GIRL IS RIGHT. IF IT IS REALLY YOUR FRIEND YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO BE STRAIGHT FORWARD. JUST BE FAIR.
2007-07-17 18:21:54 · answer #8 · answered by lil_coronita11 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her just that...
2007-07-17 18:19:38 · answer #9 · answered by Danielle G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
straight out girlfriend...
2007-07-17 18:18:35 · answer #10 · answered by Athletic.Chick.29 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋