dad never meet child?

Question

my sons father in 96 did not uphold his vsatation rights , paid child support some over the years. 10 years later, comes back in childs life child does not want to see him what are legal grounds father has harrased mother and has criminal rec. please help told mother he was going to remove child from home . child does not even know what father looks like happy with step father. new he had a father but wants nothing to do with him. mother never stopped him from seeing child father did that on own also has problems in the law with other problems mother filed order of protection and back child support court made her..thanks

now courts are telling me that i am not able to get free legal service. please help me to get answers some answers were good but i need real proof that he can not take my son away, I was told that the child needs to see the father even though the child does not know him and that i will be held responsible because i did not chase father around to see kids he never went to court either in all of this time . he sent a letter to me 2 weeks ago i tried to contact him back his mom said they do not know where he is and then he called and placed the threat to me . please keep in mind i never told him he could not see the child he never followed through. please help first court date in ny is aug 6. please also tell me how to reply to you when you answer. thanks this is a ny case.

he could have contacted me when he was 2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,why now why this.???

fiary god mther how do Iget a solisiter dont know what that is

fiary god mther how do Iget a solisiter dont know what that is

belieze how do you know this?

Answer 1

It probably depends upon what state she lives in depending upon her rights to protect her child. Her best option would probably be to contact her states attorney generals office and find out what she can do. If I were her, I would become friendly with the local police and explain her situation. I know most police departments have a report you can file for extra supervision of your property, like when you go on vacation.

Answer 2

A solicitor is a lawyer - that's the word for it in the U.K. Whoever told you to see a solicitor is right. You need a lawyer for any kind of legal challenge and for any kind of legal protection. This is a case where it seems you need both.
As far as free legal services go, there aren't any that I know of (living in the U.S.); there are, however, lawyers that will charge you on a sliding scale. One place to start finding out about this is your local bar association.
But you say that there is a stepfather involved. Can't you somehow afford legal protection by simply paying for it, even on a sliding scale? No matter what the financial problems you are facing elsewhere (credit card debt, etc.), with legal problems you just have to 'bite the bullet' and use the best counsel you can get.
It is worth the money because without legal protections, you are truly defenseless. These are all related to decisions that the court made. And only lawyers really have the education and savvy to handle those. Good luck! And if threats are made to you, report it to the police. You have to do that so that they go on some sort of record. Besides that, you will need the police for protection at some time if your son's father approaches you in a menacing manner.

Answer 3

Most fathers after time do feel overall guilty. Granted, maybe things went bad on his end and he is temporarily lonely and is just attempting a long shot to hook up on something that he had a while back (which was you). But I'd honestly say is this. Whether its an axe murder, or gang banger, they eventually think of family and the older they get, the more they realize that their ragtag loose way of life is no longer possible or even desirable. This may be his (although poor in appearance) way of trying to say "I want to know more about my son/daughter". So let me tell you what worked for people that I knew, tell him everything that you child has done not what YOU have done with the child or the stepfather, if you do tell him that way, you might as well be standing in a firing range with a target painted on you cause you are asking for it from him. When he is told all that he is missed, guilt will overwhelm him which MAY back him off, leave you alone. However, assuming that child is content with stepfather and REALLY doesnt want anything to do with the biological father is walking a tight rope, wait till he gets through his independent years and you put your foot down, he/she may 180 on you. Note the word MAY, kids are sometimes hard to tell how they will react so MAY is a safe word to use.
Any way, the bottom line is listen to what he has to say in between the #^%@#@ @#@^@# #$%@#%@# and other threats. I know people wont want to hear that but maybe you'll see what he is really looking for.
As far as what YOU can do, you are the mother yes but dampening the visitation of the father says something about you too and not that you are a protector...
If you raised him/her right, then a controlled DHHS neutral visitation should be capable. After a few visits then hear what your child say. Not trying any attempy to find a safe way for your child to visit with the father is just bad and will lead to interesting futures. Granted, you may be fortunate enough to ***** foot around it for years just to have the father of the child to become an old, gray, lonely and miserable SOaB and that'll make you happy BUT ITS NOT ABOUT YOU! Sorry, thats the way it goes. Dont like it? Give the child up cause you are smothering the child into destruction.
Let him see by himself and not just get all information from you and your family.

Besides all that, legally, you have a great case and should do a fine job of robbing any chance your child has of ever learning to speak with his father, and isn't that what all Mom's on child support checks really want?!

Answer 4

He can't just take the child he has to prove that you are unfit. Also for the time he has been away and has not seen the child in court you can state that the child is not comfortable with the visits and can request supervised visits. The child is old enough to have his say in court. He may not be able to refuse but he can be heard. Also pull together a list of people who can testify that he has harrased you. Keep phone records and mail anything that will help you in court.

Answer 5

The child should not be forced - and any decent father would not force it!

Get the father to send letters and the child will see him when the time is right for the child ... could be 1 day, 1 week, 1 year, 10 years......it's up to the child.

PS Damn good job done by the step-dad!

Answer 6

If she has a order of protection from him he is not allowed to be near them, if he does call the police immediately. Take him back to court and tell the judge she is be harrassed and threatened by him. Also mentioned he has a criminal record and she is afraid for herself and her child and that he refuses to obey the order of protection. The child is old enough to state his opinion, the judge will at there discretion ask the child if he wants to see his father, if the child does not a judge will not force the issue.

Answer 7

your child should not be forced to see somebody,that he does not want to see,it is not like the guy is a good role model,i would get a far away from him as i can,have family member move in , he has a criminal record,he has not been a farther to your child,i say move where he does not know where you are,your child should not have to go with a poor excuse of a farther like him,your child needs real love and i don't think he is what your child needs

Answer 8

My ex, never kept contact constant with his son, letting him down all time. courts kept giving him chance after chance, but i always asked my son if he wished to see his father, later when he was approx 9, he said he didnt.
We went to court, they got social workers involved to interview my son, and when they did, they said he was happy content, and saw no reason why his father should be in his life, as all he caused was misery to my son.
He is now 18 and if he wanted to see his dad it would be fine with me, as i have never been the ***** from hell, it has always been my sons decision.
It paid off he now can't stand his dad and has give him a piece of his mind.
How satisfying is that>>>>>After all he gave me hell for over 6 yrs. he got what he asked for.

Answer 9

she has to see a solicitor essential worry bout the money after,solicitorwill help with that.solicitor will make child ward of court means father cant take child out of country,tell him what you told us.he represent you in court

Answer 10

i would seek an attorney for protection. he will have the burden of evidence in order to take the child away. consulting now with an attorney will help later if he does do anything. maybe even apply for a retraining order to protect the family.