shouts and screams at you that you can leave him and stay all alone and you dont need him .or do you just keep shut and make him feel that u r dependent on him and cant live without him .u r helpless .he can have his way .is it betteer to develop security in his heart or insecurity that u can leave him any moment which is better to hold him apart from loving him like hell . plzzzzzzzz help
2007-07-16 23:13:56 · 6 answers · asked by kamya 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Insecure or paranoid men remain that way, no matter how much reassurance you offer or control you surrender or verbal abuse you swallow.
Your marriage sounds like just a war for control, full of threats and verbal violence and fear. This damages each of you, more and more, no matter the reconciliations, no matter how you shrug it off or the numbness. Verbal violence leaves WORSE wounds then physical abuse. It is HARMING you both.
If you have any shreds of love left, for both your sakes, see a marriage counselor. If he refuses, see a counselor yourself. It might be the most loving thing that's left is separation and divorce.
2007-07-16 23:40:44 · answer #1 · answered by SC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's better to get counselling, personal and couples if you can. There's a lot of information on the net too under emotional intelligence. He will only get worse until you both know how to work a realtionship. You can nicely hold your ground. People like that don't appreciate psycholgy, that's why they haven't learned and are repeating what their family did. It's a real serious problem and there's a lot of very efective answers out there if your persistent enough. You need some really good professional advice. Some are so much better at these things than others That's why I think a lot of searching on the net can lead to a lifetime of learning that'll keep paying you back forever.
2007-07-17 06:36:06 · answer #2 · answered by hb12 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kamya what is better to do .A good place to start would be to stand your ground nobody deserves this treatment it is bullying thru intimidation is that the life you want. You deserve better treatment and you need to make that clear. What a lot of men give a woman in a relationship is anything they will accept ,abuse etc... Life is way too short to have to put up with another persons baggage.It is one thing to try to help them in fact it is noble. It is completely different to enable him to continue this destructive behavior. If he was drowning you would have to let him go because if not he would drag you down with him .Don't get dragged down you deserve better.
2007-07-17 06:31:29 · answer #3 · answered by brian m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh dear. Sometimes love is just not enough...
YOU can't teach him to feel secure. YOU can't teach him to stop verbally abusing you. YOU have to take steps to stop this abuse or it will turn into physical, and often, death.
Call a professional and talk to them about the steps you can take. 1-800-799-7233. This is a National Abuse Hotline. They are good at what they do. Talk to them!
My heart and prayers are with you.
2007-07-17 06:25:38 · answer #4 · answered by Barbara 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are trying too hard. Be yourself, if he can't respect you, it is not love.
2007-07-17 06:18:08 · answer #5 · answered by Discovery 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is kind, gentle, honest...
2007-07-17 06:27:32 · answer #6 · answered by Muthe 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋