I would like some advice - if you fall for someone attractive at work and you are married what do you do ? I have had a platonic relationship with her over lunch breaks but the staff were jealous and complained to her now we cant be seen together - do I go the next step and try to see her after work or not - it is a strain seeing each other at work knowing we cannot communicate. What would you do ?
2007-07-16 22:39:35 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You get over it and move on. You're married...that means you're off the market!!
2007-07-16 22:41:38 · answer #1 · answered by Some Guy 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
STAY AS GOOD FRIENDS YOU WILL BE RESPECTED MORE BY HER FOR IT but like everyone else has said talk to your wife because if you are looking to start a relationship else where then you have marital problems that need addressing!!!
I would be asking does she want a relationship with me??
If so then why?
Because I assume as you work in the same place she already know you are married!!
Do you know if she is in a long term relationship??!!!
On the other hand it is perfectly ok and normal to have good close friends of the opposite sex. I myself have loads of male friends but have no intimate relationship with them!! it is purely platonic and has been for years.
As you say your work colleagues are probably jealous.
Why can't you communicate at work! That is essential to working successfully as a team...your boss can only separate you from being teamed up but cannot stop you from talking to each other in your breaks!
Hope i have been of some help & good luck in sorting this out
2007-07-17 05:59:09 · answer #2 · answered by Friendly-Girlie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU ARE MARRIED- are you forgetting this. You sound like a teenager in his first crush.
If you are drawn to someone else i suggest you leave either your wife or your job pronto and sort yourself out.
What can this new woman offer you that your wife cant? Are there problems in your marriage, if so you should go through these problems rather than running off to someone else who takes your fancy. Is it company, try spending more time with your wife- talk to her. If you have made the decision you wnat to end your marriage then at least tell your wife first and give her a bit of respect. Dont just leg it with another woman. Imagine how hurt and devastated your wofe will be when she finds out.
I dont know your wife or your relationship- only you know how you feel about them. At the end of the day is this woman worth your marriage???
2007-07-17 05:45:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Were the staff really jealous or is that interpretation? Perhaps the so-called platonic relationship looked a lot more to them, and so they weren't happy at this potential affair going on under their noses. You are pushing this more and more towards the limit and forcing yourself into circumstances that give you temptation. Walk away from it. Return to being pleasant to her and that is it. You are married, remember your vows and work on them. If you're unhappy at home speak to your wife, she can't help you if you don't tell her about your feelings. If you need to speak to this woman at work, talk to her about things you and your wife do. Mention your wifes name in general conversation so that she also is reminded that you're off the market, her attitude towards you should also change to a 'back-off' attitude (hopefully unless she is a real tart).
2007-07-17 05:53:40 · answer #4 · answered by QueenBee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sitting in the middle of this same thing, rather dont do it!
Or if you and this girl are friends only, then speak to and ask your wife..
If there is more than friendship then run as fast as you can and 4get the thought even crossed your mind.
If you think you are under strain now, then trust me when i tell you that it gets a hell of a lot worse when you are in the middle of something that can potentially hurt so many lives...
I wish i could turn back my own clock and re think my choice...
You still have a chance to not do it!
2007-07-17 05:45:11 · answer #5 · answered by *Lee*D* 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you want to ruin your personal and work lives, by all means see her. I'd suggest however that you do the honorable thing and arrange the alimony for your wife now.
And if either of you is subordinate to the other - the other coworkers' complaints are utterly justified, and you are a juicy lawsuit begging to be filed.
2007-07-17 05:43:16 · answer #6 · answered by SC 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you willing to loose you wife, your children, and maybe your job over a platonic relationship? you dont even mention wether the women involved is willing to do the same! This is just a case of "---- teasing" dont be silly!
2007-07-20 10:19:07 · answer #7 · answered by betty 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stupid question.
you are married- stay well away.
If you wanted to go around having affairs why did you get married?
If you want a relationship with this woman, at least have the decency to leave your wife first.
2007-07-17 06:18:01 · answer #8 · answered by Catwhiskers 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it would be a relationship of convenience. You are married and it wouldn't be fair to start something without splitting up with your wife first don't change horses in midstream let her go back to mother or other family
2007-07-17 05:44:12 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
if you are married you need to tell your wife what has been going on and seek couples counseling. YOU need help because you are willing to sneak to see this other person. I see a divorce in your future very soon. ppl like you make me sick
2007-07-17 05:42:55 · answer #10 · answered by I hate stupid ppl like you 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can't see her at lunch breaks because other staff complain...
Tell them to F-off and mind their own business.
But do not cheat on your wife keep it platonic!!!
2007-07-17 05:43:35 · answer #11 · answered by mrbatfink 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋