How can I prove my daughter is being mentally and emotionally abused?

Question

Over the last few weeks I my daughter has told me of the things her dad has said to her & done. It sounds to me like he is mentally & emotionally abusing her & I need to know how to prove this without her dad knowing & making her life even harder then he does now. He has told her that he is going to make sure they put me in jail for not paying weekly child support. Also he told her if she didn't stop intentionally spilling food in his house they were going to live in a box under a bridge cause she would never be allowed to live with me. He did spank her & leave bruises one day & when his family tried to get involved he threatened to get a gun & kill everyone so it wouldn't be a problem anymore. He tells her she is not allowed to call me when she is with him for any reason. She told me he has started drinking allot & that he hardly even sleeps. I also believe both he & his mother are doing drugs again. I know she won't talk to just anyone. If he found out he would make it worse

Answer 1

As you were once married or at least has a relationship with the man who is the father of your daughter, if there is anyway to have a civil conversation with him about your concerns over the well being of your daughter it would be better for all involved.

If you want it totally behind the scenes investigation, you will need to hire good attorney in family law/child custody issues that has an outstanding PI (private investigator) either on staff of contrac and it will not be cheap; otherwise, contact Child Protective Services; however, their investigation will be open, not clandestine.

Another thing to take into consideration is why you did not get custody over the father in the first place as it will not only have a bearing on your credibility, but if he is found unfit until a complete investigation is done, your daughter could end up in the foster care system temporarilly or even permanently.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

Call the national Child Help Hotline at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (Their url is below). Child Help won't report it for you but they can listen, help and arrange a 3 way call to help you report it to your local authorities. They are a great resource. A lot of very good information is on their website.

There are other things you can do which may help:

Teach your daughter to call 911. It may save her life. Tell her she doesn't have to say anything into the phone. She can call and leave the phone off of the hook. The emergency operators will hear the commotion and send the police. Is there a phone in the home that's preprogrammed to 911? If so, if her dad asks about it later she can always say she has no idea how it got knocked off the hook.

But encourage her to talk about what is going on. Because of fear, sometimes kids will lie to invesigators and say the abuse isn't happening. Don't coach her but do let her know it's ok to talk about what's going on if she is asked.

Get an inexpensive spiral bound notebook and keep notes when you talk with her. Make sure you keep dates and times in your log. It could be useful as evidence later.

Talk with your local legal aid office to see what help is available if you want custody. Look in the phone book under "legal aid".

Most of all, tell your daughter that you love her and that none of this is her fault. Make sure she knows you feel that she doesn't deserve to be treated like this and that no matter what happens you believe her and stand by her 100%. She and you will both do much better in the long run if she knows you're there for her.

Good luck!

Answer 4

Go to Children and Youth and then the County Sheriff with this. Someone is bound at that level to get involved, especially if there's drugs and alcohol involved around a minor child. When you go, be very "together" and firm; don't fall apart and lose it. Remain calm, but firm. Get her school involved as well. If you can, get the school nurse to physically check her out for bruises or other signs of physical abuse. Ask the school to have the district psychologist conduct a mental evaluation to determine what you suspect. With all this, you're bound to get something rolling in your favor.

Answer 5

Wow! I am praying for you, and your daughter and family to try and get out of this situation...You should make an annonamis (sorry spelling I'm not the best at it) phone call to Child Social Serveses and tell them everything...you do have proof, your daughter...her voice will be heard, and you having courage to come on here and ask for help was amazing...I am praying for you and your daughter and you should just make that phone call....

Answer 6

You'd better call Child Protective Services. Tell them what your daughter has told you. They'll investigate, and if she's been telling you the truth, then he'll be in a lot of trouble.

Answer 7

You have to step in and be the voice for your child...This is your job as a parent. Do not let someone hurt your child .Call the police get them involved so it is documented. Take him back to court and have is visitation rights taken away. He is a piss poor father and does not deserve to see her.There are many dangers in this situation, abuse, drinking and drugs. I would refuse for her to return to her father.

Answer 8

From what you writed, you're a sprint paranoia, yet i will gues which you're mentally ok. in case you prefer your newborn returned you prefer a stable interest, a stable criminal professional, you may desire to have the money for a nanny, and, you need to use his weapons(purchase her toys and chocolates) and enable her sense the mum love without scarring her. do not tell her that her dad is loopy, or communicate undesirable approximately him, she would have the ability to in straightforward terms be petrified of you. Take some days off, play along with her in some parks, purchase each and every of the failings she love, constantly smile once you're along with her, make her sense delicate, play along with her...drink imaginary tea in case you may, young little ones like to play. while she is doing a stable element say "wow" "you're fantastically intelligent" "i'm pleased with you". attempt to comunicate along with her dad, if he's stupid, you don't be, attempt to make up with him, to not get returned collectively, yet to proceed to be pals. Its very dificult for a newborn to be raised with a single be certain, so, do not chop up her up, you may the two boost her. tell him that a newborn needs the two parente, and that it is not a toy .you do not could sleep alongside with your organisation partener to make a organisation strengthen;)

Answer 9

Child Protective services will obtain all the proves for you.

Answer 10

call cps. i would immediately go and have his visitations taken away. tell the courts your suspicions and they will investigate. do it soon. she should not be in that obviously drug induced violent house ever again