Ok everything I'm going to say sounds really corny but it is TRUE.
If this guy is pressuring you into having sex than he does not love you. And love is the core of any healthy sexual relationship. Thus, you're sex would be no good. It would be empty and leaving you feeling just that. What a loser this guy must be. You will feel when you are ready. When you're with the right guy you will WANT to...not feel like you HAVE to. I was 19 when I lost my virginity and I do not regret it because I was with a respectable man who loves me and never once asked me for it until I told him I was ready and we decided it was the right thing for us to do together. And I was mature enough to talk to my mom and tell her I was going on birth control. After having sex with someone you feel 400 times close to them. If you have sex with this loser you're going to end up feeling even more emotional with him and be more invested and he'll probably just leave you because he got what he wanted. Pretty pathetic. I promise you that a real MAN would not pressure you into something you felt so uncomfortable with. And tell this scum to get tested before he comes near your body. Hey, maybe start telling him you want a baby and maybe he'll get scared and back off!!
2007-07-17 16:57:51
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answer #1
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answered by Eden 4
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you know inside what you want to do. GO WITH YOUR FIRST INSTINCT. You say you don't want to because you are scared, you are 14 and don't want to get pregnant? All seem like very good reasons to wait sweetie. DON'T do it because he wants it. You might "care" for each other...you might even love him...but its a different love. Its not a mature love where you can make these grownup decisions and be prepared for whatever consequences come your way. And getting pregnant or an STD is a very high consequence. You have plenty of time to find the right guy. You say you don't want to lose him...having sex with him is not going to guarentee him staying. And if you say you won't have sex and he doesn't hang with you anymore....then hes' soooo not worth it! If he waits until you are ready and mature enough to be respoonsible for this step then thats a good guy...but trust me there are FAR and FEW in between of guys your age who are like that. At your age its all about the hormones. I was 17 when I first had sex and I don't really regret it. I will call it a "learning experience" the guy I was with was a jerk and treated me bad...not cool. I think back and wish it didn't have to be him...which is my one regret probably....I don't regret the actual act. I felt like I was ready. Thats only for YOU to decide. NOBODY ELSE! Good luck sweetie I hope you make the right decision
2007-07-17 01:34:06
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answer #2
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answered by armywife 4
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I was 15 and my boyfriend was 16 when we both had sex for the first time. We had been dating for about a year and he really wanted me to have sex with him. I wasn't worried that he would break up with me if I didn't. In fact I know he would have stayed if I did or I didn't. I just wanted to make him happy. It was really scary at first and painful. He wore a condom and he went very slow because I asked him to. It hurt a lot and we stopped. Later we tried again and completed it. Then it wasn't so painful. I ALWAYS made him wear a condom! We have continued to date about 4 years and have enjoyable sex on a regular basis.
HOWEVER, I regret loosing it so young. It really does take away your "innocence." And certainly increases pregnancy risks! I think I am lucky that the guy I gave my virginity to is someone who stuck with me and someone I can see myself marrying. I would be so angry at myself for not saving myself for my husband and regretful. It also leads you to give your goods away more easily. You say "well heck, I'm not a virgin anymore so why not?"
If this guy is pressuring you, explain to him the reasons why you don't want to do it. As always, if he can't understand and accept it then he is not worth keeping. Ask him how he's going to support the child that you two may have? That always gets them thinking about something other than their...ahem...
IF you do think you want to do it, wait. Wait just a little longer after you have come up with decision and then after about a year if you two are still dating and still feel that you're ready to have sex and mature enough to deal with any reprecusions such as a baby, STI's, and emotional problems, then you can.
ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS PRACTICE SAFE SEX!
My personal opinion is that you should wait until college age at least and when you have found someone that is truly special and deserving of you. Then discuss it. Remember if you two can't talk about it, then you probably shouldn't be having it.
Good luck girl!!! Hope this helped!
2007-07-17 01:30:49
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answer #3
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answered by caththegrim518 1
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LET HIM GO NOW
The bastard doesn't deserve you!
That's what one of my boyfriends told me, he sounded very nice and loving. I had sex with him, turned out he was an asshole and a player.
You're 14! Dont have sex until your conscious of what your doing.
Before you do anything concerning sex, get on the pill.. Alesse is the lowest one, so probably the best for your age. But anyway go see a doctor, and always force the guy to use a condom.
But dont be afraid to lose your guy. Thats what hes playing on. And also, if he really cares for you, hell wait till your ready, if he doesn't, it means he only sees you as a piece of meat.
Hope this helps!
2007-07-17 00:58:51
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answer #4
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answered by Anonymous
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Dont have sex with him if you are scared to. To let him get what he wants at your expense will cause you years of regret, unless you truly WANT to have sex with him. If you dont, tell him to back off, tell him that you dont want to yet. Hell, im 16 and I choose to be a virgin. Im not christian, I'm just not ready to. Listen, if he really, REALLY loved you for you, he would still stay with you even if you chose to abstain. You dont have to wait until your married, but wait until it's with someone special, who you want to have sex with.
2007-07-17 00:57:02
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answer #5
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answered by Mo 4
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hi dear,
there no proper time for sex my girlfriend used to ask me to have it when we were 15 and after that we had sex daily nd she is not pregnant once lso. u ca have sex with ur bf but ask him to be very soft with u and take pregnant control measure like condoms or pill. i'll prefer my gf for condoms as pill may harm u and ur body due to ur age
2007-07-17 01:25:02
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answer #6
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answered by king 3
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Don't do it. Explain to your boyfriend that asside from the fact that it is NOT legal, you are not ready. You are only 14, and you need to be mentally and emotionally mature. If he really cares about you, he will understand.
2007-07-17 00:57:21
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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You know the answer. Everything you just said means you are not ready.
I was 30, and it was special because I waited.
2007-07-17 00:55:10
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answer #8
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answered by RadTech - BAS RT(R)(ARRT) 7
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Just Say NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!......if your asking yourself all these questions your not ready...dont worry if he leaves you he probably never really cared about you...he just wanted sex....
2007-07-17 01:12:29
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answer #9
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answered by latina_franco 2
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