can anyone recheck my essay?

Question

please!! here's the link
http://www.geocities.com/linocastillo03/
my main problem with essays is Run-ons and Comma Splices can you help me with that as well?

Answer 1

Eliminate the question mark at the end of your second sentence in your first paragraph.
Get rid of the word “being” in the last sentence of your first paragraph.
Change “living” to living.
Your second paragraph restates what has already been said in your introductory paragraph. Unfortunately, this is not the place to do this. I would suggest getting rid of that entire paragraph and two sentences of the first.
Is your thesis statement “It is true that when we see, hear, and
listen to a piece of art we are actually interpreting it in a way that makes us reveal ourselves and probably the way we had lived?”
There is no need to have “bad” and “horrible” used in the same sentence. One or the other will suffice.
“or images of anything,
and she will always have something bad to say about everything.” To an outside reader, this sentence makes her sound like a Screwdge. Is this the effect you were trying to make?
Eliminate the rest of the first sentence in your third paragraph after “When looking at Edvard Munch’s “Skrik” (often translated as The Scream or The Cry)…”
Eliminate “but what about someone who has not” in the second line of your sixth paragraph. Put a period after “it” in the second line of your sixth paragraph. Replace “goes” with accompanies in the second line of your sixth paragraph as well.
Eliminate the third sentence of your sixth paragraph. Add in: “For someone who didn’t read the poem, however, the painting has it’s own meaning unique to each individual viewer.”
I’m not sure why in your last sentence of your sixth paragraph you speak of paintings that have “no words or titles” when your entire paragraph has been about a painting that had a explanatory poem. Please clarify what you were attempting to say.

I hope my suggestions were helpful. If you would like me to recheck this document or if you have questions about a particular comment made or need further assistance, don’t hesitate to email me at [e-mail].

Answer 2

It is true that when we see, hear, and listen to a piece of art we are actually interpreting it in a way that makes us reveal ourselves and probably the way we had lived?

this sentence has errors, it should not have a ? there should be a comma after art.
There are some things that you should check using spell check. SOme of your grammer is off.

good luck!! If i was a teacher, no offense, I'd give u a b- it needs work. I do like the concept tho.

Answer 3

Interpreting Art

In her essay, “This Is Our World," Dorothy Allison gives many quotes and ideas about art and how it impacts on us. None of her quotes could be more accurate than one that talks about 'How we would reveal more about ourselves than the artist' by commenting on their work. It is true that when we see, hear, and listen to a piece of art we are actually interpreting it in a way that makes us reveal ourselves, and probably the way we had lived? How we interpret a piece of art totally depends on how we see life, and how we have being living it.

“We know if we say anything about what we see in a work of art we will reveal more about ourselves than the artist” is a quote that says that no matter what the artist is trying to say, we will always see something different; we will see something that reflects us. In other words, it does not matter what an artist is trying to say or do. If the path we have been following is different from the artist’s, we will never agree with him. When Allison says art she is not referring only to paintings, but to all methods of art, from music and writing to photography and poetry. Just as some people claim to interpret paintings, we all interpret all methods of art in individual ways.

This quote by Allison could not be more correct. The ways in which we interpret a piece of art really depends on how we see life and what we think about it. In the way we interpret music, for example, we are actually listening to what we want to hear. When we look at a painting or picture, we are looking at a reflection of our state of mind. When we say something, we are just describing what we see in ourselves. What we see in a piece of art also depends on how we have lived, and what type of experience we have had throughout our lives. Bad experiences can cause us to see something bad, while good experiences can cause us to see things in a very positive way. Many people might not agree with Allison’s quote but, just like music, poetry and photography, writing is art that reflects people’s minds, so you who disagree might be interpreting it in a very different way.

One of the many genres of art that gets different reactions is music. Not really knowing what the composer of a song is really trying to say, we would always get different reactions out of it. For example, there is a song by British progressive rock band Pink Floyd called “Time” that says, “Tired of lying in the sunshine, staying home to watch the rain” This piece of the song can be interpret differently, depending on the person and the person’s history. To someone that never has time to party, or never goes out with friends to have fun, these lyrics would seem to describe his personal history, never having fun, and when the opportunity to have fun is present, he prefers to go home and do nothing, as if he was scared of getting wet or, never wanting to take the risk. However, to someone who does the opposite, party all the time, these lyrics only talk about sunlight and water because they do not know the meaning of staying dry; they only live by the moment. This song and many more can be interpreted in many ways.

In Allison’s essay, when she looks at a magazine ad with a father throwing his son into the air and the words “Your father will always catch you”, she looks at this as something bad and horrible. The reason for this interpretation is because she was raped by her step-father when she was a child, so she sees the picture as a reflection of her own childhood. When she read the words, maybe she thought about her step-father trying to catch her and never being able to escape from him. As a consequence of the raping, she will never be able to see something good out of images with families, or images of anything, and she will always have something bad to say about everything.

When looking at Edvard Munch’s “Skrik”, (often translated as The Scream or The Cry), many people would see totally different things, depending on the person’s background. Someone who has read the poem that goes along with the painting will know the meaning of it, but what about someone who has not? The painting has many things to say, and it might also represent much more. For some, the man screaming could represent a soul, for others it could represent themselves. Once again, everything depends on the person’s personal experiences in life. Paintings can mean many things, especially if they do not have words or titles.

Allison was correct when she said that we say more about ourselves than about the artist when we comment or critique their art. The way we interpret art depends on how we live, so when we say something about someone else’s art, we are saying more about ourselves than about the artist. People will look, hear, and read something and every response will be rather different, because everybody comes from different backgrounds. Even every day art, like magazine advertisements and music, will have different impacts on us, depending on how we live and what our experiences had been.