And your fiance knew this... but went ahead and got a snake, would you be really upset with him/her?
I told my fiance that since we're moving in two months, he could get it, but AT THAT TIME. Not before! I don't want to see the dang thing, and I seriously get panic attacks around snakes.
And the part that ticked me off the most, is that he bought it, and took it to his friend's place and didn't tell me about it until after dinner, and when we got to his friend's place last night, he gave me a kiss, told me how beautiful I was, and that he bought the d*** snake.
If you had a phobia, or just plain FEAR of something, would you be upset, like I am??? Or am I over-reacting?
2007-07-16 06:15:16 · 12 answers · asked by Rock Goddess 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Yes you can be upset. I am terrified of snakes, and even though my husband would like to have one, he would never get one, because he knows it would ruin my peace of mind. I would think every little brush was the snake hiding somewhere. Plus, he knew he was doing something wrong since he hid it at his friend's house and was sucking up to you before he told you. If he respects you and cares about you, he'll give up the snake because it's not as important as you are.
2007-07-16 06:19:13 · answer #1 · answered by smartsassysabrina 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ok, i think that since your fiance did that to you that ur not over reacting if you told him about this extreme fear of snakes he shouldnt have even thought about doing this i work with many reptiles most being snakes and some people just freak out seeing them i idmeadietly put it away i think your fiance should have taken more thought into what you wanted to happen
2007-07-19 18:38:52 · answer #2 · answered by Ryan M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't fear them, so doesn't understand your fear or the magnitude. Talk to him about this again and let him know it's not that you just don't like snakes, but you are terrified of them (whether that is a reasonable fear or not).
If he respected you I'd think he could find something else to amuse him and wouldn't press the snake issue. It's not like having a snake was life-or-death for him and they really aren't meant to be pets. Not much fun for the snake...
2007-07-16 13:19:53 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think you need to discuss with your fiance what this is all about. Either he doesn't really understand or he doesn't believe your phobia, or he thinks that all you need to get over it is exposure -- rather controlling and not a good sign.
You did tell him he could get the snake, though, so you left the door open.
Counseling is a good idea -- you for your phobia, and both of you to improve your communication skills and better understand each other.
2007-07-16 13:21:51 · answer #4 · answered by emenbensma 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
He probably didn't know you were deathly afraid of snakes because every girl claims to be deathly afraid of snakes. I'm deathly afraid of spiders i don't think you over-reacting i just think you should get mad i mean you two are getting married and maybe it would be best if you told him what you think about the snake and how you think he went behind your back. Talk it out, you never know where your going unless somebody talks it out!!!
2007-07-16 13:34:36 · answer #5 · answered by Jaimjaim 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
he probably didnt think you were that serious about being scared of them cause most people are but most dont have phobia's and since you agreed he could get one later he probably thought "well why not now"...dont be too harsh on him. he knew if he told you before he bought it that you wouldnt let him and he was all excited about it but he should have respected how you feel towards it...thats what fiances normally do
2007-07-16 13:18:21 · answer #6 · answered by jezzika 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Dump him and his snake. If a man loves a woman he wants to protect her, not upset her.
2007-07-16 13:18:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
YES!!! It's completely horrible and incociderate to do such a thing, & to ur fience!!! UGH!!! I would get rid of it while he's out of the house, just to see how he feels to have someone do something w/o telling u first!!!
2007-07-16 13:19:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Give him the silent treatment until he gets rid of it.... Or find out what he is scared of and get one...hehehe maybe a pet bird-eating-spider that always escapes under the blankets...lol
2007-07-16 13:23:20 · answer #9 · answered by Honey 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would be upset.
If I were as afraid as you sound, he would have to make a choice: me or the snake.
I would also never have agreed for him to buy a snake.
Good Luck.
2007-07-16 13:18:30 · answer #10 · answered by Dimitar A 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋