What do you do to take a break from your marriage?

Question

Lately our marriage has been running on a short fuse, it's like anything could spark a fire, I hardly talk to him since I can sense an argument if I make a mistake, I feel like I'm going crazy, I became so afraid of him, last month we argued, he put his hand on my neck( it was the first time he did anything like that) Yesterday, I caught him in a bad moment, he barked at me like a mad animal. We stayed in a different room at night because, he complains I rolled around too much on the bed. It feels like I'm going to step on a time bomb when I'm around him, since he picks on every details.
What do you do in your marriage if you feel like you need a break?

Answer 1

Sounds like you two need to find a good marriage retreat (check with your pastor or a local church) and some marriage counseling to help you guys through this hard time.

Answer 2

First if you have children I would see about trying to go to a marriage councilor. It sounds like there are some underlying issues that need to be resolved. If that does not work and this type of behavior continues, I would look into getting a separation and divorce. I am sorry to say that, but it is true. You do not deserve to be treated like an animal or talked to like one. The very idea that he grabbed you by your neck is inexcusable! If you are living in fear, you need to get away from him and get legal help. You should be with one that loves and respects you. Someone who though you may have arguments will still act like an adult and you all can talk thing out. Your safety and that of any children you have comes first! I know there must have been a time when he was different, and acted like he cared, but he has changed. Do not be like some women who stay and hope he will change back again, only to be latter found dead in a wooded area. You need to think of your safety, happiness, and future. Please be careful and if need be call the police to deal with him. Just remember to save yourself, and any children you have. Please think things through and do what you have to for yourself so that you will be safe.

Answer 3

When there is a change this drastic in a marriage that was previously happy there is a reason to be concerned.

Is he under a new stress at work or facing a crisis? Or is there a new person in his life that he may find some joy being around that he resents your relationship?

I would ask him if he would consider a weekend away alone...to reconnect or if he would be open to one or two marriage counseling sessions together.

good luck...and be safe!!

Answer 4

Talk to him..maybe he did something wrong and is regretting it. && upset at him self. I mean I really dont know, theres probably nothing happening, but something is obviously on his mind. Just sit down and talk to him calmly. Tell him you dont want to fight anymore. Ask him why he is so mad and what you did so wrong to deserve it.? Sometimes breaks help and they're good for the relationship but then again they could be bad. What if the break makes yall go seperate ways. Maybe a break isnt what yall need. I think yall need time alone to talk and work your problems out...
Im sorry.
I hope everything works out for you. :)

Answer 5

Your situation doesn't need a break, it need counseling or ending.

A break isn't going to change anything...the issues that are behind the current problems will still be there after any break. You two need to talk about what's wrong and why he's been so violent and negative...if you can't work it out between you then seek professional help (or consider parting ways).

Answer 6

right now what yu need is a holiday.. trust me..
tell him you are going to visit a relative or friend.. stay a week.
it helps you to calm down and think things thru.

hopefully when u come back he wont be so irritable when u come back.

One thing i have realised is that when men behave like that its becos they have something that they are not telling you.

I truly understand how you feel * walking on egg shells. * its the most horrible feeling.. you are thinking how could someone who told you that he loved you more than the world itself just turn so cold and mean overnight.

Its not your fault. and its not right.

if after the week he still is the same then you need to start making plans to go away and stay longer.

Answer 7

I give him room and take that same liberty myself. I know that when he comes home from work, don't talk to him unless he talks to me first. My husband used to make me feel like I was walking around on eggshells too--he still can at times. I just know to do anything I can to make his life easier when he gets into those moods. I take out the trash instead of nagging him to take it out. My only question to him will be, "What do you want for dinner and when do you want to eat?"

I'm sorry to hear about him putting his hands around your neck, and I sincerely hope that it doesn't happen again. If it does, you might need to get yourself out of a dangerous situation...but I'm hoping it won't come to that.

You need to do something to make yourself feel good about life. This doesn't include going out to clubs, but maybe visit with a friend for a little while just to get yourself feeling like a worthwhile human being again. When my husband used to act that way towards me, I know I felt like I was the worst person on earth and everything was my fault.

If you two haven't had sex in awhile, it might just be all the pent up frustration, in which case I would just do it with him to get that release out, before things explode any more.

Best of luck to you both!!!

Answer 8

There some think more going on in your marriage, as you dont state much of whats going on. A man just doenst chew his wife head off and refuse to sleep with her just like that. Something is truly bother your husband. There is no break in this marriage, its time to put your foot down and talk to your husband straight out and firmly of whats going on. I cannot definetly say what gong on in your marriage but my gut feeling is your husband has been missing around and dont know how to cope with it so he lashes out on you like if its your fault which it isnt. Men have this habbit of turning things around to make it look likes its your fault. Get to the bottom of your marriage problem.

Answer 9

you're very pretty. if you wanna take a break you can come and stay with me for a while. do you like camping? i live in a tent. seriously, though, sounds like you've got big trouble. maybe you need to take a permanent break from this marriage. 1st, though, you should probably offer to stay if he'll go to couples counseling with you. if he won't go, he probably thinks he's perfect and that you're the only problem. maybe he'll open his eyes if you're gone, but probably not. marriage is supposed to be a happy thing, built on trust and openness.

Answer 10

You need to get a divorce. I was in a relationship just like this with a girl where everytime I came home we argued about something. She would yell and scream and I just shut her out eventually . I remember I hated to go home because of the fights that would last until 0400 in the morning, and they were usually just one way fights. What was also sad is that the fights were about nothing at all. After my blood pressure started to rise due to the increase level of stress and me becoming unhappy, I moved out and found myself enjoying life again and then decided to get a divorce. Good luck.