would be okay with their mother inlaw staying with you at a brand new house being married to your husband or wife for only for a year . but shes staying for one year e cause you have not been working cause you just had a baby and you husband wont help finding a babysitter
2007-07-16 05:58:45 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
my husband is bi -polar and a momas boy
2007-07-16 06:03:33 · update #1
If dh was a mama's boy, nope, wouldn't happen in my house. Since my dh isn't a mama's boy, I might go for it if she had her own space (bedroom, bathroom, living area and maybe a kitchenette) like an in-law apartment. I would want to make sure that some ground rules were present and that they were abided by. I wouldn't put up with any interfering in our marriage or parenting.
A better solution is for the new mother to take the initiative and find a babysitter on her own if her dh won't help her. She can ask friends with kids who they've used & if they're happy with that person. Check at your state for people who are licensed and then check references (if they're someone who isn't at least a second hand acquaintance). Post a notice at your church that you're looking for excellent child care while you work outside the home. See if you can work a different shift than dh which would make the need for child care a moot point. See if you have a friend or relative that would enjoy spending time nurturing your baby and pay them for it.
2007-07-16 06:32:44 · answer #1 · answered by StacieG 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well sounds like husband did find a babysitter, you just aren't happy with his choice. If she is a meddling inlaw and the two of you don't get along, you should punch your husband for the arrangement. But if she is nice (there are a few out there) then you should be appreciative..you will be helping each other out. I would definetely make sure she knows who rules we are going by, and that this is only a temporary situation.
2007-07-16 06:04:19 · answer #2 · answered by goodgirlabout2gobad 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, my brother has his grandmother living with them as a mutual arrangement, she helps with the baby so his wife can go to work, and they take care of her so that she doesn't have to be alone. Unfortunately I personally wouldn't agree to that arrangement. It would be helpful to have her around, just not living under the same roof. I would suggest that if she wants to be a part of the baby's life in that way that she find her own home near where you all live and be involved that way. eI couldn't agree to letting her into my home and taking over. Unfortunately my mother in law is most likely going to be like that, only she doesn't like to speak English and i can't speak Spanish so we'll see how that goes. At least you can tell when she's being smart with you, i have to guess! Good luck and try giving that option for her to move up there permanently to make the child closer to the grandparents rather than their just being there for a year and then distancing themselves.
2007-07-16 06:06:18 · answer #3 · answered by Gonzo's Wifey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would hate it. Whilst I actually like my mother in law she'd still drive me batty if I lived in the same house as her for a year. Maybe it'd work for some families but not for us...if you don't think it's going to work and hate the idea then I think you should talk things through some more with your husband.
2007-07-16 06:26:00 · answer #4 · answered by starelda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is what you are telling us is you need a babysitter because now that you have had the baby you have more important things to do than raise the child ? I would not have a problem with her living in the same house as loong as EVERYONE KNOWS their boundaries.
2007-07-16 07:40:59 · answer #5 · answered by nickle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's wrong with having your mother in law move in and help out? In some countries, whole families (parents, aunts, uncles and cousins) share a house and the responsibilities of raising the kids.
2007-07-16 06:01:23 · answer #6 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't be okay with that. Even when his mother visits for a few days she has to stay in a hotel. Mother-in-laws are noisy and opinionated as hell. I couldn't take it! Baby or no baby, I'll have to find ways to use her less as possible. Tonight, I'm gonna pray hard for you!!!!:(
2007-07-16 06:18:27 · answer #7 · answered by W.O.W. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you object that strongly to it, then you and your husband have to discuss it.
Some people get along very well in this situation. It's cost effective, the child gets to know the grandparent, and the parents don't have to worry what may be happening in day care.
2007-07-16 06:05:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who is more important to him... you have to make a stand for yourself. Let him know that a baby sitter is more important to "you" than taking care of his mother in the process. It is up to you and you alone to fix this. If you don't let him know how you want to be treated now, then you will put up with this **** for a long long long time to come.
2007-07-16 06:02:27 · answer #9 · answered by writethewrong 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think it's okay, i mean it's kind of yeah a big thing, but if you need another job, that's a good way to get help with the baby right? unless u don't like ur mother-in-law
2007-07-16 06:02:20 · answer #10 · answered by anonymous24242424 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋