I am divorced. The mother has indirect contact with the children, through letters and etc and insists on having a "likes and dislikes" sent at regular intervals. However, she refuses to give her own address for me to post them to, and instead asks it to be sent to her parents home in another country, which will then be redirected to her.
In her letters, she sometimes leaves disturbing comments about how she can "see" us.
Thank you.
2007-07-16 05:12:01 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Children aren't really 'children' anymore. They themselves are the ones that have called the comments disturbing, especially when we are in the dark about where she lives.
2007-07-16 05:23:34 · update #1
I don't know. You may try consulting the attorney that handled your divorce and custody case. She does sound a bit strange.
2007-07-16 05:15:22 · answer #1 · answered by Stefka 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are the children? Do they read these things about how she can "see" them....??? And do you have some kind of court ordered contact?
If the only contact she has is letters she isn't a mother and I wouldn't have problems putting those letters in a great big box until the kids were old enough to decide if they want anything to do with her. As for the "likes and dislikes" thing....that's just weird. This woman sounds like she may be mentally disturbed, in which case I'd take those letters to the court and petition that she:
1. Be required to undergo psychiatric assessment before having anything more to do with the children.
AND 2. Be required to provide you with her current mailing address, phone number and other essential information. You might look this up; it may be spelled out specifically in your divorce decree.
YOU HAVE NO OBLIGATION TO SEND ANYTHING TO HER PARENTS and I would stop doing so immediately.
2007-07-16 12:22:35 · answer #2 · answered by lady_phoenix39 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see nothing wrong with having an indirect post mail contact system. It certainly isn't illegal. If the negative comments are in letters to the kids, you have a right to censor those as custodial parent, but check the divorce degree or see a lawyer. A better method would be to allow those, but have some question and answer discussions with the children about them. Kids often are more knowledgeable about such things than we think. Let them make their own judgments.
2007-07-16 12:18:31 · answer #3 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Is what legal? Asking you to send mail to her parents, or putting comments in her letters that you find disturbing?
I'd hold onto the disturbing examples. If she's unhinged, they'll probably get worse so you'll want to be able to show a pattern.
2007-07-16 12:23:27 · answer #4 · answered by Ian S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Uh, wierd! Tasteless at least. Illegal im sure....Sounds borderline harrassing and stalking. Call an attorney and in the meantime stop returning her letters until she gives you an address for herself- not a P.O. Box either.
2007-07-16 12:40:13 · answer #5 · answered by bellesnail 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make her parents aware that " if she wants to talk with her kids, then she needs to give them a call. and give them a ph # for her to call them at. Don't worry about her comments. If she knows where her kids are and wants to speak with them, I would let her have that opportunity. Don't write to her parents anymore. when this stops she'll be forced to call them or write to the directly.
2007-07-16 12:31:36 · answer #6 · answered by Hi its me again 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if it's legal, but it does sound kind of creepy. Contact your attorney and keep up the watchful eye. Trust your instincts.
2007-07-16 12:16:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋