Are so called Senior citizens setting a bad example to the young?

Question

As a senior citizen myself I see lots of OLD FOLK acting in a rude manner and who seem to expect and demand a level of service which they don't themselves put into practice.
They are especialy badly behaved to teenagers and others they see as beneath them

Answer 1

There are some really good answers on here, but I'd like to give another perspective or two.

I have found in many years of working and studying the elderly that many of these rude seniors are victims of being alone. If they have little family, they tend to disengage from society and get deeply set in their own patterns. Families do not tend to visit these elderly persons and, therefore, they are responsible for their own upkeep, including their dispositions.

Social Services are very limited on what they can do for these persons.

Because these seniors are responsible for themselves and have few coming round to keep their outlook bright, they tend to become very self-absorbed, by necessity. When out shopping for necessary items of food, clothing or whatever, they are introverted and when something out of their realm, such as rudeness happens, they tend to "give for what they got" without even thinking about it. These situations happen fast in comparison to what is the "norm" for these elderly and the moment is gone in the blink of an eye. I think it's a misconception to think that the elderly see many others as "beneath them". They're struggling just the same as many others, only we don't take that into consideration.

This is what happens when the elderly are left to fend for themselves with no support. Not always, but, obviously, for a good portion of the population worldwide.

I do agree that there is a possibility that some have been this way most of their lives, however, there are those who have not, as in all societies. There are always those who, for one reason or another, have had life handed to them on a "silver platter" and now that aging has overtaken them, do not know any better way to handle it. Fortunately, not all fall into this classification.

By far, the elderly population are respectful of others. There are many reasons for this starting with the fact that it's the way they were raised. Many of the men did duty to make this Great Country of ours the bastian of freedom that it is during World War I and World War II, Korea, Vietnam and other wars.

If you find out how a person lives, how they struggle, how they survive, then you will find the true answer to this question.

Answer 2

I think that may be a bit of a generalisation. In short, not all the elderly are rude and arrogant therefore how can they be setting a bad example. Those seniors you mention have probably had that attitude all their lives.

There are good and bad in all generations, unfortunately the 'baddies' are noticed more and everyone else is labelled with the same reputation. If you are not in the baddie category, do you lead by example?

It is possible that you don't notice the many who go quietly about their daily lives without drawing attention to themselves. The ones that hold a door open for a young mother with a buggy, or say a genuine 'thank you' to the young person who holds a door open for them.

I've always believed that there is a reason for a person's behaviour. Perhaps some of the 'old folk' you refer to are reacting to a bad experience or treatment they have received in the past that remains in the subconscious. Even illness or pain can make people seem rude, as can fear when aware of nearing the end of life.

Answer 3

No I don't think they are as a rule. There will be some older folk who are thoughtless or rude ,not necessarily to young people but to all and sundry.They have probably been unpleasant people for most of their lives..There are also those seniors who feel rather frightened or intimidated by the youth of today and this is reflected in the manner of their relations with them.. The vast majority of seniors though are grandparents who are loved and respected by their grand children and as such set a good example in behaviour and courtesy to all the young people they meet.Most youngsters would not like to do any thing to upset their grandparents and respect the standards they uphold. I, as an older person ,have met with degrees of rudeness at times but not all that often. I treat all others with respect,hold doors for people, especially young mums with kids and buggies , let people pass in supermarkets, sometimes help another oldie get something from a top shelf, and almost always I get a smile or nod of acknowledgement. It is unfortunate you have experienced a rather different course of behaviour , I don't honestly think it is the majority of old folk who act this way and in the main they are a good influence on the young. Young people are influenced by many other things in the way they behave .. The media is probably the most to blame for lower standards of behaviour and morals these days .

Answer 4

You are wrong there.
Senior citizens DID put manners into practise. They had enough manners to know that when you see an old person who can hardly stand; get on a bus...you got up and offered them your seat.
And yes...In a way, younger people ARE beneath them. This is the problem these days. Young people are being taught that they are as adult as any adult.
They are not. Senior citizens have a right to expect respect from teenagers. The seniors paved the way and fought for a lot of things that younger people take for granted today.

Seniors love young people...they have grand children....It's only because seniors are now feeling and suffering from the brazen 'don't care' attitude of younger people, why they have HAD to adopt this sternness to gain...or try to gain a little respect.

Answer 5

I have teenagers & find it is only some senior citizens that are rude.
i.e. my 15 year old son held a door open for an elderly lady instead of the expected thank you he got a tut & a look that could kill.
on the other side there are some very nice older people.

I dont think age isnt the issue you earn respect what ever your age, unfortunately some people just dont or wont

Answer 6

A lot of times young people treat seniors the same way. That and young people (like myself lol) aren't always the wisest people on earth but we often act as if we are and that must frustrate those who sometimes really DO know better. We can be thoughtless of our seniors sometimes. We forget that they dont' always feel well, can't always walk as fast or react as quickly. We forget about them.

I also think that the generation gap causes a lot of elderly to think "They're in the best part of their lives and they're wasting it" or perhaps feeling bitter over their own past youth and their own regrets. We're different people now than our grandparents were. We have different values and live different lives and make different choices. Tolerance is hard to come by for anyone sometimes.

Then some elderly fear teenagers. They have the energy of children but the bodies of adults, more or less. They have the reasoning skills of children but the intelligence of an adult. They're a formidable force. That being said, most kids are good kids. At least where I live. I'm in my mid 20's and i'm starting to see teens as kids, younger than me and I'm starting to realize what a no nothing know it all i was when i was their age. But if you talk to them, they're mostly good kids, nice to people and generally good character. But let's face it. many are loud, they're opinionated and stubborn and reckless. And sometimes they're completely insane :) Not all kids, mind you but lots of them. That's also what makes them so wonderful sometimes. But I'm sure it's hard to overlook once you grow away from it.

My great grandmother used to move me out of the way when she needed to get something. When I'd ask her she'd say "I have a lot less time than you do" She got tired out easily and didn't like to have to wait with a heavy load or in bad weather. That made sense. But she was never disrespectful or mean to me. She was just assertive.

I was sick for about two years and during that time, I never felt well, was always tired, I was unable to do things I'd once been able to do easily and was in pain. It was frustrating and did nothing for my mood or general love of other people. So i was probably harder to get along with. I felt a bit the victim and very isolated and bitter.I'm not saying it's the same or that I understand but I work with what I know :) And I'm not saying seniors are like this as a rule but I'm sure there are some that are. I think getting older has significant challanges all it's own.

Of course, driving to work I'll still mutter "hurry up granny" to the lady in front of me. I do have a bit of a smart mouth ^_^

Answer 7

I think every teenager had the feeling that old people consider them as dirt beneath their feet. I know I have. Just some of them have an idea that being old makes them superior, wiser, when really its unwise to treat people around you like servants.
But that's only a small amount of them. Others believe that age doesn't give you a right to act that way. If some old people act that way, just ignore them. That's what I'm trying to do.

Answer 8

Yes I have noticed this in the past. To get respect you must first gain it.

jennyann 4: If you really ARE a SC, I find your attitude truly offensive. I wouldn't want any son or daughter of mine following what YOU did. You seem to be generalising to a very great degree - "we won a couple of wars" - what age are you - 90. Not everybody stayed at home to look after the kids, cos not everybody could afford to. Lots of people did sleep around and not all homes were pig stys. Oh! BTW, there have ALWAYS been fat people.

Answer 9

The same can be said of people of any age....

I have had 30 something people just breeze by me as if I didn't exist, especially on stairways as I am making my slow and careful way down--sometimes jostling me enough that I almost come to grief.

As I'm struggling to open a heavy door for myself (I have arthritis and sometimes those doors feel like they weigh a ton!) I suddenly have teenagers pushing by me, as if my JOB was to open the door for them!

And how many times have I stood in buses and subways, grimly holding on to the nearest pole, as I am bumped from all sides, and look longingly at the seat that is buried under the shopping bags of a 50 something man who has commandeered a three seat bench for his personal use?

And yet each and every time I have quietly taken the abuse thrown at me by these cretins..."Look out, why don't you!"...."Get OUT OF MY WAY grandma!"...."Make me!"

I KNOW that rudeness is shared by all ages in a society. I do not choose to perpetuate it. But I think you should be ashamed of yourself, assigning this behaviour to only senior citizens. Rudeness is rudesness, whatever the age of the perpetrator. And it IS NOT solely the province of senior citizens.

Answer 10

There are some very rude people about, some are aged, some not. A lot of older people have given out a lot of service, much of it fighting in a war for freedom for this country, a lot have worked very hard throughout their lives AND given good value for money. Many have all sorts of aches and pains, they're entitled to be a bit cranky now and then. ;o)