Do you know anyone that got married because they were pregnant? In your experience, do they often work out?
2007-07-15 23:56:59 · 18 answers · asked by Jasmina 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
my friend married his gf because she was pregnant..and their relationship never work out....they are now separated.
2007-07-23 13:38:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a relative who married because she got pregnant on the first date.
They married 52 years ago.
They get along and the kids come first.
He has made a very good living for the family.
She has confided in me all through their 52 years and it haunts her and she wonders if he really has loved her or just made the best of it because of their children.
She is a relative and a best friend and I have had great empathy for her all these years.
Yes, it can work out but there has always been a question in her mind.
I'm most thankful that I didn't have a worry like that.
I'm most thankful for the caring husband that I have.
It is important to think of the child being raised by two dedicated parents.
2007-07-23 19:43:44 · answer #2 · answered by DeeJay 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
more often than not, it won't work. However, getting married because the girl is pregnant doesn't necessarily mean it was a SHOTGUN wedding.
I was pregnant when I got married but there was no pressure on my husband to marry me. In fact, he was free to run away but he didn't.
Our marriage was in fact a struggle during the first 15 years. it was only during the last 4 years that things got a lot better.
2007-07-23 22:13:23 · answer #3 · answered by Leonie A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes and no. I know someone who married because they had to and have been together for nearly 25 years! It takes a lot of work, which most people are unwilling to admit to in this day and age. Everyone seems to want things to go along so easily, and most people are urging them to go out and have a good time. That's not going to help any marriage!
Plus, a marriage that is caused mostly because of kids is going to have less of a chance at success, but it's not impossible. that's just because so much stress comes with having a child, and the couple should know each other as much as humanly possible before even thinking about getting marriage.
Still, I wouldn't say it's impossible, but it has a very, VERY slim chance at survival. The couple has to decide that they're very dedicated to what they're doing and that nothing is going to stop their success.
2007-07-23 21:11:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know two couples that married because they were pregnant. One couple was married 20 years. Their main problem was his insecurity about her commitment to be faithful. He may have had this problem, no matter how they married.
Second couple knew each other a long time, married twenty years, til his death. They sincerely loved each other. I knew them all my life. She questioned "would he have married me, if he didn't have to". As the years passed and they went thru the trials of life, it became very clear that he trully loved her. He discovered it as a surprise, too.
It takes patience and reassurance of each other. People are too quick to attribute all the normal struggles of marriage to the baby, and how they got married. Those stuggles may have been there anyway.
A little extra effort to say and show you love each other, and that is why there is a baby, may help. If love isn't there, it is rare that the baby stress and changes will make love happen.
Today, people do not have to marry when pregnant like society expected twenty years ago. Today it's more a choice, hopefully less of a problem.
2007-07-23 20:55:09 · answer #5 · answered by Pat B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It just depends on the couple. If both parties are willing to make it work no matter what, yeah they will. The problem with getting married for those reasons, in a hurry and all, usually the two people don't really know each other well enough to determine whether they really want to be with each other for the rest of their lives. Anyone can make a marriage work, but only if both of them work on it together as a team.
2007-07-23 06:41:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In this day and time marriages of any kind have a hard time lasting. Adding the stress of a pregnancy before the marriage has a chance to grow is often difficult and results in divorce. I know a few people that married for this reason and it didn't work. It amazes me with all the things we know and all the forms of birth control that this is still happening. I wish you luck.
2007-07-23 19:12:52 · answer #7 · answered by Cutie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mom did, she already had a son and was dating my dad, back then you just didn't get pregnant and be single. Anyway my dad married her finally when she was about 6 months along. He didn't want people to think he was a bad guy for not taking responsibility for me. Well my mom has regretted it every day of her life. She stayed married all these 39 years miserable as heck and just because she didn't want the stigma of being pregnant and unmarried again with a second child from another man. Yuck what a life!
2007-07-22 04:52:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your only reason for marrying is because shes pregnant.. think again, because by doing so your making a time bomb thats waiting to explode in due time. You need to see yourself with the person your going to marry, ask your self, how would I feel for my partner 50 years from now when we are both old. If you can picture yourself and your for it then go marry the person. Shut gun marriage on the other hand is a marriage by force as what I say, that girl won't be pregnant if you don't have sex with her right? now why do you have sex in the first place? is it because you love and is it because of Lust!. Most shutgun marriage in philippines they worked out, you know why? its because of the culture, people are relational. The moment you start loving the person by loving everything she loves you will find out that conflict has no place in your relationship. But this is not easy...in the place where we are right now where you see all around you all the dirty tricks and fancies, it hard to stand firm in what you believe. This is where we need somebody to save us from this situation, Only Jesus can help us in learning to love our spouse and not our self. By nature we are selfish but this nature is change when we have Jesus in our life. The oldest couple in Guiness world records John and Annie whom celebrated their 86th year anniversay last July 15, (where both are arranged marriage) when asked "what made you reach this long being married" they just answered.."we both learn to love everything that our spouse love".. I do hope you find the answers to your question. "It would depend on how you are committed to love your spouse more than you love yourself" then it will work out.
2007-07-22 21:04:35 · answer #9 · answered by joemolens 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some do and some don't My brother and his wife have been married for over 20 yrs now.Sometimes the man feels that he was trapped into the marriage.Think twice before jumping in with both feet.Do no get married for the baby.If your not happy the baby will suffer in the long run.
2007-07-22 01:15:10 · answer #10 · answered by fernwood 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know lots of people that got married after pregnancy. Some worked out some didn't. It comes down to the individual person.
2007-07-16 00:05:05 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋