Yes, we had had sexual activities previously but like our relationship is a long distance type and sometimes we asked ourselves to do certain things but I ended up turning him off bc I don't do it bc i feel uncomfortable. I went thru a very bad thing in my past and Thanks God I knew how to deal with that and Now i feel better. my fiance knows about that bc he even helped to get right off from that. But like I want to give my best to who's gonna be my future husband. I feel so sad bc he feels sad I can't please him. How can i change that?
He pleases me super well and I... just dont reply back like he'd wish. He says that he doesnt understands why I feel that way. we love alot each other.
What can I do?
2007-07-15 18:43:56 · 10 answers · asked by *live,laugh,love* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Really this is about you and not him. There are a couple of issues here. First off, do you think of sex as fun and something to share with your lover? You need to have enough trust in each other to let go a bit and to realize that nothing you do will make him think less of you. Secondly, how is your opinion of you? Do you see yourself as atractive and desireable, or do you pick apart every little thing about you... trust me, to your man you are a bleeping sex-godess and he spends most of his time thinking about being wrapped up all over you! Here is some advice to you from my life. When my wife and I were married she was young, Catholic, and very shy and insucure. We created what we called "nude weekends". Starting friday when we were both home from work and lasting untl we left for work on monday morning, we had to be naked 24-7. We stayed in and we stayed around each other... for sure it led to a lot of sex but we also just sat and watched TV, cooked meals, talked and joked... all in the buff. This helped my wife to be comfortable around me when she was naked... whether making love was the goal or not we got to see each other in just about every angle. After 7 years of marriage we share a strong trust and faith with each other and we are open and receptive to each other. So you need to find out why you are uncomfortable making your fiance feel good. If he is not asking you to break laws, endure pain, or demean yourself, just go for it... do your best and keep at it... that is how we get better! Love yourself... your man does... you are all he thinks about... rock his world and expand yours! Good Luck.
2007-07-15 19:24:16 · answer #1 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sexual activities , long distance , yes most people would feel uncomfortable. if your serious about this guy , and you said , you love each other a lot , and he is your fiance , then you should be able to tell him how you feel and he should understand try to get together , meet up with him and see if you still feel the same way about him
2007-07-15 18:58:27 · answer #2 · answered by sam, b 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you still have the complex hanging around.
you need to spend more time with him before you decide to just give up. do you write him letters and him back. relationship are not all about physical touch. communication is key
getting to know each others through many channels of communication the progress. sexual communication is a byproduct not the orgination. in other words you two need to talk more and write to each other more than in bed. And this esspecially means agreeing more
2007-07-15 18:53:01 · answer #3 · answered by l33nix 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dump him. It is better to call off the wedding than go through a divorce. This will not get better with time. He may have premature ejaculation and is obviously not willing to deal with it, though there is little they can do. Sex in a serious relationship leading up to marriage is not a trivial matter. I don't believe in trivial sex but it is essential in a real relationship with romance and chemistry. Don't sell yourself short.
2007-07-15 18:49:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you love him it will work out i honestly didn't feel comfortable with my then boyfriend now husband for 3 years. Also because of my past. It doesn't happen overnight and some take longer than others but if he cares for you it will work out and you'll get over your fear. Good Luck
2007-07-15 18:48:56 · answer #5 · answered by SiCnGaged 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im sixteen too and my step dad sexually abused me whilst i became youthful and it began out this very way. in case you do no longer provide up it now.. you would be like me: regretting no longer telling somebody the 2d it got here approximately. i understand its hard and frightening to admit (been there, accomplished that) yet a minimum of you will no longer might desire to stay in concern anymore like I did. Please tell your aunt approximately this, whilst my mom found out she became devastated that i did no longer tell her until now and that she became relationship a guy who became able to that. i'm going to be honest, your aunt would be very unhappy or perhaps depressed once you tell her on the commencing up yet she will thank you interior the long-term. think of of all the different ladies you may desire to be saving from this unwell guy in case you tell somebody.
2016-10-03 21:59:44 · answer #6 · answered by Erika 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest a certified sex therapist who works through your intimacy issues and gets to the bottom of your feelings as well as helping your both work through this together.
2007-07-15 21:14:38 · answer #7 · answered by Wicked Good 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
there is nothing i can do since i feel physicall uncomfortable doing certain things though i like to do it to satisfy him too. so i will just lie there and let him satisfy me. i guess he will be satisfied too by doing what he is doing
2007-07-15 18:49:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
trust ach other as well love concer.s all in my opion if you dont care about him tell him this in my opion?
2007-07-15 18:49:38 · answer #9 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont marry him
2007-07-15 18:49:12 · answer #10 · answered by vanessa c 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋