do i need to get out of this relationship?

Question

i just dont know what to do anymore. me and my other half were doing fine up until a few months ago then everything started going downhill. he will NOT sleep with me anymore. he says our bed hurts his back too much but it never botherd him the first 6 months that we had it. he has no time for me anymore but any time his ex asks him to go do something with her hel go with her. every time i ask him to go do something with me he either tells me hes busy ( he hasnt worked for over a month) or hes too tired. he conveniently sleeps while im home and then when i go to work he stays up and then when i get home hes wide awake and i have to fight to stay awake to talk to him because im so tired from working. the worst part is ever since we been together hes told me he loved me and now he wont tell me anymore. every time i say it to him he tells me " yah whatever" or "thats so overrated". its really hurting my feelings. ive talked to a few friends about it but i wanted to see what yallz thought.

thanks for all your support guys. to whoever asked, no we dont have any kids together

Answer 1

From what you said, I would say he still cares about his ex and he's pulling away from you. I guess the next thing I would ask is how long are you going to keep paying to take this treatment?

I think I would put his bags on the porch and change the locks. Because as long as you are letting him get away with this behavior he will take advantage of you. MAYBE , once he knows you're serious, then he will come clean one way or another. Then and only then will you two will decide to go to counseling or he will go back to his ex. But you should not be supporting this behavior.

Answer 2

The picture is perfectly clear but are you willing to accept it?

This man is not interested anymore. I've been married to my husband for 27 years and we've only slept apart when I had to go into the hospital to deliver our children and when I had a heart attack. I know every relationship is different but when you tell your man that you love him and his response is "yah whatever" or "thats so overrated" and he's spending time with his ex, then I would begin to look at the picture as if this man wants out but really doesn't know how to approach the subject.

Now answer yourself this, since this man isn't working, you are the one footing most or the majority of the bills right? Then how in the world can you allow him to treat you this way?

Answer 3

Well you don't have to put up with anybody that not treating you right. It seens like your other half is slowing losing interest in you, he got his heart set on his ex-now. He been telling her that he doesn't love you no more and that your are not sleeping in the same bed no more. he is a lazy person, that want a women to take care of him. He taking your kindness for weakness. Just tell him that you need to know where this relationship is going and why do he have to jump everytime his ex calls. and it the bed is giving him problem, tell him to go out a buy a new mattess for the bed. I will take it day by day until you feel you have enough of it.

Answer 4

I think you need to tell his out of work A S S to get a D A M N job or let that hooker that he's been messing w/ take care of his sorry, lazy A S S.
Sorry I cuss alot, but that's the way I feel. I can't stand people especally men that let someone take care of them, then they wants to cheat. That nasty B A S T A R D could bring an STD to you, so it's a good thing that you don't sleep w/ that DOG!!!!!

Answer 5

honey i dunno 4 how long u have been with him but if u r sure that u still love him then u must fight 4 ur love and not let it die. there could be many resons he's acting the way he is. u tell me u go to work and he aint got a job. its probably his pride that is hit because all men feel that their partners have to depend on them. also u say that u r tired when u come home from work. probably u had said no a few times when he was in the mood earlier? also saying aint enough my dear. u have to prove ur love. buy him something he always wanted. wear ur sexy clothes. get a full makeover. cook him his favourite dish. be kind to him. remind him of the woman u were or are whom he fell in love with. instead of focussing on ur own problem look at it from his point of view. u may find something that u had missed earlier. and still if it aint working out then walk out. he might not b worth it after all.

Answer 6

Have you heard of the book" He's just not into you"? Well he's just not into you. But it sure is nice having a roof over his head until the ex finally takes him back. You asked if you should get out of this relationship, the answer is YES!!. The sooner the better, don't waste one more day of your life on someone that doesn't appreciate you.

Answer 7

Maybe he doesnt have the courage to end the relationship either!! Why not take the lead in an information gathering exercise and peacefully ask him if he is having an affair with his ex. Its not appropriate or helpful of him to try to help her deal with HER emotional loss of HIM.. This seems like a triangle in the making... Who plays Victim/Rescuer/Perpetrator

Answer 8

I take it y'all are not married? Honey, he has gotten the interest in his wife started again.I would just find a greener pasture if I was you. Just tell him you are fed up with his bull. Obviously he is not man enough to face you with the truth so just show him that you are a better man then he is. I know it is not going to be easy but in the long run, it will be easier to go ahead and get it over with.. Good Luck.

Answer 9

What would he say if you suggested a break? One bad thing about living together and not being married is it's hard to actually get a break even if you need one to reevaluate what you're doing.
If you moved out (that sounds like the easiest thing since he's not talking), would you continue to see him? Would he want to continue to see you - and you made yourself available? Or would it be the one thing that accomplished what he wants most - an end to this relationship?

Answer 10

If he has the energy to run around all day then he darn well ought to be able to do a little thing called JOB. What is wrong with you? Why you think ANY man was so important that you need to support him?What are you paying for exactly?Wise up!Get a MAN. Throw the little boy back to his momma to finish raising!