This is one I wrote a few years back.
The Knife by Yoselis Ramos
Trying to find someone who can relinquish the pain
To just take the remorse away
Trying to find the refuge to ecstacy
Im tired of all the tears, the pain- so deep
When will I find serenity?
Starting to get desperate
As the knife gets through deeper
Wondering if anyone can see the expression
That lies on the visage of my heart
As i cover away my tear
Full of sorrow, fear, and frustration
Tired so much of the suffering
Trying to find someone with the consolation
Someone with the courage to reach out
And remove the knife from my heart
In need of help
Of someone who wont tare me apart
Wishing you knew just how I've felt
The knife, stabbing my soul as the sharp edge
Begins to create crimson tears
Having words all around me
Many saying it was just a waste
Can I believe what was being said
Was loving you a mistake
You took my heart and soul
Now lies an empty space- a hole
2007-07-15 15:10:32 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
My heart in despair that aches
I wish you would be the one to bring it back to ressurection
All because of you, it is this way
Give me back my soul
Please take back what you have done
Isnt it better to die with a soul than to
Live an eternity without one
Having many reaching for it
But holding on waiting just for you
The knife still there
What should I do
Should I let go or hold on
Do I listen to my heart
Tell me because my love for you
Isnt yet gone
2007-07-15 15:13:31 · update #1
I like most of it but there are lines that are to long. Try to read it with a critical eye, which is hard I know for I have trouble doing it. Try for a rhythm which I don't hear in read it.
2007-07-15 17:04:41 · answer #1 · answered by Coop 366 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, this "cuts" deep and powerful too, bless you and keep penning *^_^*
All the Best, Shad @)~>~
2007-07-15 22:47:31 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very , very nice, painfull but those are some of my favorite kinds
good contol . ti was very intese ,thank you
jethro
2007-07-16 04:13:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fantastic...and beautifully written....
2007-07-15 22:20:53 · answer #4 · answered by Jesus is Real 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is so excellent you should publish your poem.
excellent poem
2007-07-15 22:31:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-07-15 22:13:23 · answer #6 · answered by msrandom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋