I've just come back from another horrible visit to my mother in law. What is it about mothers who only have son's treating their daughters in law like s**t. is it true that no girl is good enough for their little (32 year old) angels?
2007-07-15 11:33:48 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
exactly the same situation hun...... right down to the 32 year old thing... funny coincidence that isnt it except acctually my visit wasnt that bad today...... she was quite placid , you can get quite unnerved when that happens........ i have learnt to let it go right over my head... thats the only way to survive....
once there were even punches thrown.... never let it get that far..... ( i wouldda won though)
2007-07-15 11:40:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
MIL's that do that are of a controlling nature. She is just afraid of losing her son's love and that she wont be #1 in his life and feels the daughter in law is undermining all she has taught and done for her son. It's an insecurity thing.
2007-07-15 11:40:39 · answer #2 · answered by Moose 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a mother-in-law, am a mother-in-law, and have two sons. I think that it all depends on the person. I get along fine with my two daughters-in-law, but i let my sons get on with their own lives and the partners they have chosen for themselves are their own choice not mine. There is no point in causing a problem as i would be the one who wouldnt see my sons . I just get on with my own life . My mother-in-law is a different kettle of fish entirely. She is clingy and demanding and passive-aggressive, hates me, for no other reason than i am with her son. As a result my partner doesnt see as much of her as he could, and has even told her to amend her behavior as it is uncalled for and that she hasnt even taken the trouble to get to know me so how can she say that she doesnt like me? She has two other children but is not the same to their partners. I think it is because they are all Welsh and i live in London(I do not live with my partner, he lives is Wales but spends a lot of his time with me) I think she thinks that i will lure him away but she doesnt realise that i dont need to as she is doing a great job of driving him away. What I think is that some m-i-lws feel threatened and go on the attack. This means that they are crediting you with a lot of power and are scared, so dont let it get to you too much. Thank goodness I got that off my chest Hugs!
2007-07-15 11:58:54 · answer #3 · answered by Yoda 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i have recently acquired mother in law status hopefuly my son in law will only have nice things to say about me. im sorry for you we are not all like that . i have had my fair share of bad mothers in law its not nice causes a lot of stress. maybe you could try to find out what she has against you if anything, maybe she has a wrong impression about u in some way, maybe its just jealousy that u have her sons attention now not her. if it s really bad then your husband should say something to her cos it will cause problems between you.
hope things get better. good luck and keep yr chin up.
2007-07-15 11:49:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
what happens is the son always compares the companion to the family. since the person grew up with the family, the family is the best that he/she knows, and is closer to. because of this, the companion will never out-win the family. when the he sees his family, he/she vents to the family, and that is the only thing that the family ever hears. because of this, the family always gets a negative taste for you. Then the family (mainly mother) takes it out on you.
the second reason, is that the mother is trying to naturally protect her son. this is a natural human trait that is not learned, but imbred in women.
the third reason, is that the mother feels a challenge from you, so they lash out at you.
because of the third reason, them being that way is actually a compliment.
2007-07-15 11:45:00 · answer #5 · answered by Steve C 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
well my ex mother in law hated me from day 1, she had never met me before, she only knew that her son had a new girlfriend, as soon as she saw me she gave me a disgusting look and took him into another room, i could hear raised voices, then he came back out and said that we were leaving, he was really upset but would not tell me what she said... i eventually married him some years later, always being nice to his mother, she would not come to our wedding, she made some lame excuse up that she was not feeling well, i gave her 3 beautiful grandsons and she never once congratulated me, all she said was (they look like my son more than you) of course they bloody did, they were his kids she didn't even come to my house to see my new born babies and i had to take them there to see her only to be made to feel uncomfortable and awkward, she would leave the room when i came round and leave me sitting there for ages on my own, not even offering me a cup of tea....this put a great strain on my marriage and it finally crumbled 7 years later, she was always snotty and nasty towards me, i had never met such a horrible person in my entire life, now i am a mother in law myself and i love my daughter in law, she's beautiful, smart, and a fantastic mother, my son is blessed to have such a lovely woman and i would never dream if hurting her at all, i think that some mums don't like to see their little boys detatch themselves from the apron strings, my ex mother in law destroyed all her sons marriages, she hated us daughters in law and made our lives hell....now she does not even see her children because of what she did, so she deserves to be ignored, she is a nasty bitter old woman and will never be any different....
2007-07-15 11:52:48 · answer #6 · answered by Dazzlebox 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
my partner is 33, and his mum used to treat me like an absolute angel,(she sadly passed away 3yrs ago), she was the nicest and best mother in law i could ever have wished for, i think some mums are just scared of another woman taking their role,
2007-07-15 11:39:04 · answer #7 · answered by stokies 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yeah. I wasn't good enough, I didn't clean or cook right, I didn't take care of him well enough, I spent too much of his money.
One time she asked me whether or not I had his dinner set on the table and ready to eat when he walked in the door. I said no, she attacked me immediately. Didnt I understand how hard he worked, how good he was to me, how much he deserved that one little kindness, etc. etc.
My husband came in and explained that I was kind enough to give him a few minutes to wash up and change out of his work clothes. That my dinners were always hot and on the table within 15 minutes of his coming home. Just as he'd asked me to do.
Another time, I turned the air conditioner on, on a hot day. She started yelling "I'm gonna tell on you! Not right to spend his money on all that electricity." She did tell him, too, the minute he walked in the door. Only to have him tell her "I bought it for her to use, not just sit in the window and look nice." Boy, was she mad at me for THAT! I had brainwashed him into thinking it was okay for me to waste his money.
Not good enough for their angels. yep.
2007-07-15 11:53:15 · answer #8 · answered by kiwi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Exactly...no one is good enough. I have a 11 month old son and i can tell you now that girls better stay far away! LOL I really don't know what it is. I think that they think their son deserves the richest, most beautiful, humble, honest.... you get my point, no flaws. REALITY CHECK FOR MOTHER IN LAWS!
2007-07-15 11:37:21 · answer #9 · answered by Sadbrowneyes13 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You are lucky
my wife's mother had to be arrested after assaulting me and my wife
now that is what really encourages some one to hate their mother in law
2007-07-15 11:43:54 · answer #10 · answered by Chris CB 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋