he has an excellent job and great pay and i have well nothing really..but i cant live with him anymore ive done it for 6 years...im so unhappy i dont want to live anymore...will my kids hate me if i leave them?
2007-07-15 08:20:58 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Any mother who wants to leave her kids (and forever damage them emotionally...that is what happens) should seek professional help right away. Life can be better. Go and learn how. Call your local mental health clinic at once.
2007-07-15 08:34:27 · answer #1 · answered by Wiser1 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Since you mentioned that you have nothing...is that the part that makes you unhappy? Rather that leaving your children, maybe you should work on your own esteem. You mentioned that your husband has an excellent job. Do you have a job that you enjoy? Often people generalize their unhappiness (I feel bad because I don't have a career, etc) which makes them feel that their entire life is bad.
One of the most amazing things that I ever did was to write an obituary for myself. Basically, what would I like to be remembered for and what achievements would I like to be able to have at the end of my life. When you can focus on your personal goals (as opposed to just being generally unhappy) your life can change very very quickly for the best.
Don't just run, it never works and usually makes it much worse.
best wishes
2007-07-15 11:39:57 · answer #2 · answered by TelulahB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your story sounds rather incomplete. You can't possibly be unhappy for no reason. You strike me as being severely depressed. If that is the case, leaving your family will not be a solution. Have you ever had any evaluation or treatment for depression/mental problems? If you have and you are still in this shape, then you need to pursue it more deeply. Maybe you have other, more complicated health problems going on. Get some help and get yourself right mentally and physically, then make a decision about leaving your family. Otherwise you could really screw things up for your kids, with abandonment issues.
2007-07-15 09:41:54 · answer #3 · answered by I39 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You did not say why you are unhappy. Are you unhappy because you feel you have nothing to contribute, while he is out making all the money? If so get a job, or go to school to try and make a career. Why do you want to leave your children? They could not have done anything bad enough to make you want to leave them. No matter what happens, your children need to be the first priority. Are you wanting him to keep the children because you do not think that you can financially take care of them?
2007-07-15 08:29:49 · answer #4 · answered by tuvaralm 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why are you unhappy?
That's a huge part you left out of your posting.
Money means nothing.......money cannot and will not buy happiness despite what you hear.
EVERYONE on our planet has problems and issues. You may not see or notice them, but I guarantee you 100% that everyone has them. People with money is no different.
Include details about WHY you are unhappy and maybe your post will carry some validity. Otherwise it's a zero.
Your thoughts about your kids are short-sighted. Will they hate you? No, they will love you, but they may hate what you do. Will it affect them the rest of their lives and affect every relationship they have the rest of their lives.....YES.
If you and your husband fight and argue and spat all the time then by all means get the hell out of the house. I firmly believe that people that 'stay together for the kids' who end up fighting and arguing anyway are making it way worse for the kids than if one left the house.
But we don't know what the deal is because you didn't tell us. You don't communicate well do you? Maybe that's part of the problem.
We don't read minds.
2007-07-15 08:26:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you "have nothing" then that's your fault; not his. And if you leave you will still "have nothing" and that won't solve the emptiness or the problem. It is not his responsibility to make your life happy; that's YOUR responsibility! You need to find out what fulfillls you: is it painting, music, organizational skills, archeology, pottery, engineering? Have you ever had to work a day in your life? You sound spoiled to me and like a child that expects to be entertained. I would thank my lucky stars if I had someone that paid all the bills. That would free me to be creative and find out what I truly enjoyed; not constantly just working away at a job 10 hours a day for 36 years.
Like it or not, when you cranked out your kids you created responsibilities for yourself, not just your husband. You can't just dump your kids and leave. When they are older they will leave you, so enjoy being with them as much as you can.
And get yourself checked by your physician. Your hormones could be out of whack and you wouldn't know it.
2007-07-15 08:47:30 · answer #6 · answered by D 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Will your kids hate you if you leave them?
From the details you gave, I'd say they may be not all that bonded to you in the first place as you obviously are not bonded to them at all. You would have to kill me to make me consider leaving my children! And most mothers would agree.
What is wrong with you? What kind of a mother leaves her kids because she is "so unhappy"?
I will tell you the kind--self-absorbed, shallow and possibly mental. Get a grip! It is not all about you!
2007-07-15 08:41:24 · answer #7 · answered by wildatheart 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I could understand if you want to leave your husband but why the children. You are there mother and yes they will hate you. I am also married and I have children and I am no longer with my husband but I would never ever, leave my children. I love them too much and they do not have nothing to do with my unhappiness with my husband.
2007-07-15 09:00:18 · answer #8 · answered by Vicky 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why would they hate you. Are you their main source of affection? Are you the always there for everything Mommy?
If you are thinking of taking off probably you're not.
So as long as they do not think it's their fault and you do see them it might work out. And of course they know you love them
My husbands Mom use to take off all the time while he was growing up and she'd always come back pregnant.
He is very close to all his brothers and loves his Mom dearly. All the her children do probably because they never doubted her love for them.
Go figure
2007-07-15 08:38:46 · answer #9 · answered by theladygeorge 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes they will.
Wouldn't you have hated your Mother if she did this to you?
Made you feel like you weren't worth anything to her.
Made you feel unloved.
Made you feel unwanted.
How can a Mother do that?
It sounds like you have a problem.
And it may not have anything to do with your husband or children.
It may have to do with you.
You may be in a depression.
You really need to seek medical help.
Don't give up your family.
You will regret it and will never get it back.
Get help.
Go to the doctor now.
Good luck and take care ;)
2007-07-15 09:05:32 · answer #10 · answered by MommaBear 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋