I am 32 and have been hurt too many times, What advice can you give me to keep an open mind about men?

Answer 1

Actually, this is hard. I suspect you are dating the wrong kind of guys. Find a nice guy and be a friend. Good guys don’t do this. Second, keep trying. Don’t give you. But learn from the past.

Answer 2

Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt. Don't let the past stop you from moving forward. Everyone should start out with a clean slate - trust, no comparing with past relationships, and realize that almost everyone has a dating past and aren't coming to you in cellophane wrapping.
At the same time, don't put your blinders on - listen, watch for inconsistantcies, evasiveness, stories not jiving or adding up, don't let it pass without questioning and hear and see his response. If you are not 100% confidant that he's telling the truth or have that gut feeling something just ain't right, exit stage right! I used to ignore my gut instincts and paid the price. Now I pay attention and act accordingly and it hasn't failed me . Red flags are a sign of danger, unless you like living life on the edge, heed their warnings
Not all men are cheaters, con-artists, users or abusers, but they are out there and more than willing to take advantage of giving and trusting women. (there are women out there that do the same thing). Once they've won you over, taken what they were after (sex, money, etc) and feel they have played you as far as they can go, they disappear. A relationship should be a two way street, not where one person alone is doing all of the taking or giving, it should be reciprocated, not because they feel they have to, but because they want to. Be sure in a relatonship that there's a good balance in all areas.
Hope some of this was a help and good luck. Dating isn't what it used to be, but you can still be successful at it by listening, thinking with your head and not your heart or other parts of your anatomy and forget past hurts, but remember the things, that in hindsight, you should have paid attention to.

P.S. - Sorry for any spelling errors - spell check wasn't working!

Answer 3

I have a question for you. Are you happy with yourself? I think the most important thing a woman can do is self-care and discovery. Find out what it is that makes you happy ALONE. Trust me, when you start to enjoy your life, there will be someone who will be drawn to your light. Only when the time is right though! Remember that not all men are bad. You should also reevaluate your approach and selection of men. Sometimes what we are attracted to is the problem. Be open-minded. If you have single girlfriends, definitely hang out with them and spend time being positive to and for one another. In the meantime, visit www.meetups.com. It's an excellent website that encourages group activity for different types of interests. This is not a dating website, but you never know who you might meet! Keep your head up and find true happiness within yourself.

Answer 4

It's too bad you have been hurt that many times, but you've got to keep your chin up. when that right guy comes along, you will forget about all that hurt. You've been hurt enough you should be able to smell a line of BS right away!! If he seems like an idiot to you he probably is! There are a lot of guys in the same situation you're in, looking for a good woman, hang in there!

Answer 5

The first thing to keep in mind is that you do not NEED a man. It is nice having one around but you can survice without one. Second, I don't know if this is the case or not but don't date every guy that makes himself available to you. Develop a friendship first. You will get better insight into the type of person he is and whether or not he may one day hurt you.

Answer 6

I'm a guy. I'm 36 and I've had it many,many times too.

I've dated a lot of bad girls....that's what drew me to them in the first place. Most of the time. I felt very used and empty to be brutally honest with you. I just felt so sick deep down
inside my stomach. I knew something was terribly wrong here.

Here's a great example. One girl I dated years ago was a very strict Catholic...she would do her little prayer everytime we drove by a Catholic Church. I totally respect that and all. This is the great America...you are allowed to express your faith wherever you want. But, what I found more ironic was when later on that night after I used to take her home. We'd park way down the street from her house and we'd be banging like there's no tomorrow. Then come Sunday, she 'd go to confession for the filthy sins we've just commited the nights earlier. She always made feel like a cheap boy toy. She always kept her distance and was a total control freak.
Some girls just play stupid, little mind games with your heart and eventually break it because they treat it like a toy.

One time. we got busted by a cop in the park at night for fooling around in my car. That was so wild and oh so funny!
she was so embarrassed. It didn't bother me. I knew how I felt about her. You see...."good girl by day ...nasty girl by night"

But eventually that wears off sooner or later because you'll truly need someone good and loyal for you down the road. Someone to truly love you for you and who will marry you with all your issues, your faults, your insecurties, your quirks and etc..

Ain't it funny how love happens down the road in life???....=)

Answer 7

hi
I would just keep trying and remember the mistake you made
so you dont make it another time around.. meet different
people by going to differant functions, dont look to hard
things will come to you, we can email if you like I am a nice guy.

Answer 8

Remember that we are NOT all the same. You must know some women who hurt others, too.
It is not just men....and, fortunately, not ALL men.
I hope that you find someone who will treat you as you deserve.