Why does most of the world think that women in polygamist relationships are unhappy?

Question

I grew up in a polygamist home and currently believe that it is a happy and loving lifestyle. I just don't understand where the hate comes from, specially from those that have never even met a polygamist. I had a happy childhood with loving parents. I am sure they had their marital issues like most people do, but they worked through them together like most people do. I was never told who I had to marry or when I should get married. I was taught the religion of my parrents and then when I was old enough had to chose for myself what I believed. I have brothers and sisters that chose to live polygamy and ones who did not. None of them are outcasts and we all still get together as a family. So I guess my question is if it is between consenting adults trying to live their religious beliefs why do people who know nothing but what they hear and read in the news hate us so much?

FYI:
I do not believe in underage marraiges.
I do not know of anyone that was forced into a marriage.
And child (of any kind) abuse is not acceptable to me or my family.

Polygamist relationships are not based on sex. We do not believe that sex is wrong, but that is not all our marriage consists of.

Answer 1

It is against the law, that could be the reason.

Answer 2

Who said anything about anyone hating you? It's not so much the adults that I have a problem with, well, yes, being they have no problem with impregnating 15 year old girls who aren't classified as "consenting adults", or the girls parents who have no problem with an "adult" male getting their daughter pregnant and encouraging, or forcing her to shack with him. Brigham Young was no saint regarding this matter. I don't believe Joseph Smith was, either.

I do remember God wasn't ever really happy when people in the Bible had multiple wives. God warned him against having multiple wives. In the NT, it talks about ONE man and ONE woman.

I know I would not be okay with my husband sleeping with anyone but me. His vows stated he would "Forsake all others"...

In the US, it's illegal, so hopefully your siblings won't be found out if you live in the US. Oh, yeah, I forgot. The Bible does say to live by the laws of the land...If you are outside the US, depending on the country, it may be legal, but in the US, it's not, and for a very good reason.

But there's your answer. I don't think people really hate you, just don't believe in what you do. I bet your group isn't too fond of muslims. Why not? Is it because of what you see and hear in the news?

Answer 3

A lot of people's perceptions about polygamy are based on news stories or documentaries. A lot of these stories include allegations of abuse, incest, pedophilia, men being outcasted, etc.

It is also obvious that men seem to have the control, whereas the women do not.

Answer 4

I don't personally hate polygamists, but I could never be one. If I were to get married, I wouldn't want my husband being with another woman besides me. It just sounds wrong, that a man sleeps with more then one woman and has kids with multiple women.

Answer 5

I don't know that people "hate" polygamists, but polygamy is currently illegal in the U.S., so some people tend to frown on those who openly flout the law.

Personally, I know I could never share my husband with another woman... the thought of it disgusts me. People (myself included) tend to judge situations based upon how THEY'D feel in the same situation.

Answer 6

I stopped going to the Mormon Church because they believe in polygamy in heaven. I will not be a harem girl for all eternity. Thats not heaven, it is evil and it would be hell for me.
I certainly will not spend my time on earth sharing a husband. (I wonder which one of us he'll choose to sleep with tonight)
The Bible gives examples of polygamous marriages and there seems to be plenty of animosity among the women.

Polygamy is against the law and I think it is shameful that the law is not enforced.

Look at you and your siblings. Some of you have grown up thinking polygamy is the way to live. Disgusting.

Answer 7

Polygamy is out of norm. Most of us were raised with the values of being in a loyal committed relationship with one person. Our religious and society beliefs have taught us this as well. I don't think anyone hates you, we just don't understand your life style.

Answer 8

For muslims i think its because it is stated in the Quran" you can never be fair to your wives even if its your ardent desire". Sa‘d ibn Abî Waqqâs (RA) said: “I asked the Prophet (SAAS) who among the people are most severely tried? Prophet (SAAS) said, ‘. Man will be tested according to the strength of his faith. The stronger his faith, the more severe his trial, and the weaker his faith, the lighter his trial. The believer will be continually tested until he walks on earth with all his wrong actions forgiven’.” (al-Bukhârî)

Answer 9

Well, putting aside the fact that it's illegal for just a moment....


People scorn what they don't understand. From the outside, and it's impossible to say without experiencing it, it looks like these women are almost forced to be "brides" at very young ages and that their children arent' treated well, esp. the boys.

However, please note I don't think people hate the women. They are angry with the men, who seem to be taking advantage of women.

Answer 10

Because research supports that individuals who tend to live outside of the norms of any society are generally not as happy as those who are within the norms of that society. And in the U.S. polygam is illegal, falling way outside of the norms.,

Answer 11

Because there is perception that church elders force young, underage girls into marriage with sex with older men. Other than that, nobody really cares what two adults do in the privacy of their home.