Why do people think 19 or 20 years old is too young to get married?

Question

I have been with my fiance for 4 years this September, and have been engaged for almost a year. I am 19 and my fiance is 23. We have two dogs, our own cars, we OWN our own brand new house, and we have lots of nice things (all of which we paid for on our own by working). We travel, and we take at least one big vacation a year. We are also both in college finishing our degrees. So can anyone tell me why people keep insisting that we are still too young to get married? People just keep saying that we are missing out on things. What are these "things" that people think we are missing out on? We spend time with each other, and our friends and families, we go and have fun, both by ourselves and with each other. Can someone please explain to me what these people are talking about?

BTW- We are also paying for our own wedding. So this isn't an issue.

For those of you thinking its funny to be rude: For your information it is all true. The only help we get from parents is that they watch the dogs when we go on vacation. My fiance co-oped through college, and is in his last year. I sell my art work, a friends art, and my fiance's mothers art on the internet. We were not born with silver spoons in our mouths. We just know how to save money, and spend it correctly. We have no credit card debt.

Answer 1

In general, people see 19 / 20 years old as being quite young, and generally irresponsible... sounds like it's not the case with you though.
When people say you're "missing out," I think they're often saying, "you're missing out on other people."

Answer 2

Well, it sounds like you guys already have a great life together, so getting married is of course the next step. But people are warning you b/c even though you guys have it all good right now, the fact is you've been with the same guy since you were fifteen and in a few years your brain is going to start thinking about the what ifs and who elses and out of shear curiousity, you're going to start growing up and maybe apart. This is alot easier to do when you don't have the burden of marriage on your back, there's no paperwork when you break up. I got married when I was 20 now I'm 23 and divorced, this does make me cynical about young marriage, but also wisened to it. If you guys have a good thing going on now, don't hassle it...just throw a big party, it's cheaper that way.

Answer 3

My parents got married when my mom was 19 and my dad was 20, they had been together since they were 15/16. They are still going strong almost 30 years later. Everyone told them that they were too young and that they weren't going to last... They proved everyone wrong.

If you feel in your heart that you are ready... then go for it, regardless of what anyone says. If a few years down the road, it was a mistake... oh well, it was a mistake. You still have plenty of life to live after that!

Answer 4

I'm sorry I don't believe your story. For various reasons. Tell me, how exactly you own your own cars and a new home (especially in today's market)? Your a pre-vet major working in an animal clinic. So you make...what....$8.00 an hour? Perhaps you save money by not eating and supporting the anorexic disease? (your answers to other questions were quite enlightening)

In general, marriage at such a young age is a poor choice. The woman you are now will not even remotely resemble the woman you will be at 30. There are exceptions to the general belief but those cases are rare and few.

Answer 5

You are too young because you still define the meaning of life in material objects. You are shallow. If you weren't so shallow, you wouldn't go on to describe your ridiculous cars, house and 'nice things'. Being able to own stuff doesn't mean you know yourself. You are missing out on the years of experimenting. By getting married young you can't experiment with dating, yourself or your sexuality. You define yourself with what you own and in 10 years time, you'll be shocked with who you are married to and how empty your lives are. Then you'll probably want to pop out some babies to give you new meaning creating a hell of a life for your children. People who are shallow and immature make **** parents.

Answer 6

First of all, I don't believe you for a minute. Few 15 and 19 year olds could manage to stay in a relationship for 4 years, let alone accomplish all you have stated. Keep dreaming. If, on the EXTREMELY SMALL AND RARE CHANCE that this is true, you should not only get married, but also write relationship books, conduct financial seminars and go on tour. You deserve to be wealthy.

Answer 7

I got married at 19 & dh was 20. I don't generally recommend it, but it sounds like you're committed to each other and you're living like married folk anyway. Go for it.

When you do take the plunge, take it seriously & really continue to work on making your marriage an excellent, fulfilling one.

In a week we're celebrating our 21st anniversary & we're happier now than we've ever been.

Answer 8

Experience speaks for itself. I am in my mid-30s, married at 23 then divorced at 25. I'm not saying the same thing will happen to you, but looking back I was clearly too young and inexperienced with life to enjoy the benefits of marriage.

Answer 9

Question for you....Can you walk in a bar and buy a drink legally at 20? Why Not?
You can't even buy a drink because of your young age, yet you think you have had enough experience to marry? I could keep going on but I am sure all the other posts are covering all the other reasons

Answer 10

Someone had a silver spoon in there mouth. Could you make it without help? Also you act as if you are 8th year college and a life long history of paid vacations. Good grief grow up.