He works in a business environment with lots of women that are in their mid-20's like us. His job has also started to require that he travel pretty often. When he travels, it's generally with at least 2 other women. I've never seen or heard of anything that would make me doubt him. What's my problem and how do I overcome it. We've talked about it bothering me before and he always assures me that I have nothing to worry about.
2007-07-13 07:10:03 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't feel this has anything to do with you being insecure or that it is even YOU, per se. I think a lot of young women would not feel comfortable having their husbands travel with other women for their job. It isn't even a matter of that you believe your husband would cheat on you. It is a matter that as your husband, he is now in a frequent position of being with other women, away from YOU, out of town, and staying at hotels, maybe eating out with each other....I would think that this would make any woman not happy about this. He may not ever cheat, but the situation remains, and the circumstance could be tempting for anyone. I don't think you should blame yourself or feel you have some kind of problem. I think what you are feeling is quite normal. I don't see too many ways to resolve this issue other than to ask your husband to get a job that does not require this traveling with other women. If that is not an option, I guess you will have to trust him and try to get comfortable with this job situation.
2007-07-13 07:39:16 · answer #1 · answered by Annie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
worrying over what you don't know is such a waste of energy.There may be a hundreds of young women around him,everyday,whether he gives in too temptation or not is depending on his character.You are around guys all the time but I assume you choose not not to cheat.His choices are his and really have nothing to do with you or the relationship the two of you have.Don't think that if you and he have it going on that he won't cheat or that some how the other woman was more than you in some way,none of these things have anything to do with a partner cheating.If cheating is part of their character than they will cheat on who ever they are with.If cheating isn't a part of their character nothing or no one can cause this to happen.Character is what you need to remain loyal and honestly very few people have real character.Just live each day that you are happy in happiness and if things start to change for the worst,don't blame your self or any one else,keep it real and move on if you have too.Some people do have character,in time you will know if your guy does.
2007-07-13 07:26:09 · answer #2 · answered by punkin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's the common answer, "you have nothing to worry about" Well the thing is, if you don't have any prove, then calm your self down. It's normal in your situation to be worry, but you have to trust him, and be more discreet about it. Always be alert, don't bring the subject to often, this gonna make a void in your relationship. Trust me on this one men doesn't like when the woman are so jealous. So be modest about it but alert. Believe me if something is happening you'll know, and if nothing is happening your pushing in to happen if you don't change your strategy. Good luck.
2007-07-13 07:36:36 · answer #3 · answered by Calypsso 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are loosing happiness of today by worrying about something that may never happen . Appreciate that he assures you there is nothing is going to happen. Believe me there are signs you will not be able to ignore. Get you something special to do while he is gone on those trips. Make yourself happy or you will drive him into the arms of someone else because he will not understand how to make you happy. Wake up.
2007-07-13 07:21:54 · answer #4 · answered by New Nana 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm...........so you are insecure about something, but you aren't sure what it is and you have no reason to be insecure?
I am curious........ did your parents divorce? I think that kids who have seen their parents divorce tend to think that it could happen to them as well and they almost seek out things to have issue about.
I would suggest that you are a young married couple and you might have some personal issues about your own insecurities that are being transferred to your husband. In every relationship there comes a point where you have to take a "Leap of Faith" that you've picked a good partner who will take care of and respect the love you've given. If he has to travel for his job... if he has to work with the girls in their 20's... you need to let him. You'll drive yourself crazy with the "What if's".
Hang in there........ trust your judgement... you picked a good dude.
2007-07-13 07:20:13 · answer #5 · answered by Aron1968_30 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You always have to keep in mind that if a man wanted to cheat, he can do it anywhere and not just because he works this job. anyone that wants to cheat will do it regardless. I think it has alot to do with insecurity. if you know he loves you and you love him that should be all that matters, and you have to have trust no matter what. trust him until he actually gives signs that hes cheating or you just straight out catch him in the act. theres no use in ever accusing someone of cheating if you dont really have any proof. everyone has to keep in mind that theres always someone better looking than the other person, you just have to be happy with the way you look and be happy your the one with your husband.
2007-07-13 07:38:04 · answer #6 · answered by luvleebabygurl22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is where the trust part of the relationship kicks in.
You always want to trust, but you don't want to be an idiot if he is knock'n some chickie's bottom out.
If your really concerned there are plenty of places on the net you can find spy gear where he can carry it with him and not know and you can learn whats up. Key loggers. etc.
A associate of mine installed a keylogger on his home PC while he was away on a long business trip. Came home and got to read what and who she was writing and she was definitely cheating on him. He had no idea. =(
2007-07-13 08:00:30 · answer #7 · answered by Johnny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
B/c it's a change. And even though it's a change at his work it affects you. I agree with one of the other answerers... get yourself in shape and get happy and make him (even if he already does, which it sounds like he does) REALLY long to come home to you everyday. Don't let those other women get to you.
Trust yourself and trust your husband. Also, y'all may want to start having a date night or something... just something that is ONLY for the two of you every week that is out of the same old same old. Keep your relationship alive, don't let it get in a rut
2007-07-13 07:19:31 · answer #8 · answered by Lindsay G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone worries about something or lots of somethings. You can stop worry once you know what you would do if it happened. Once you have a plan on what you would do if it happened you can stop worrying because you know what you will do if it happens. Then let it go. Worrying is not going to stop it from happening but knowing you can and will get passed it if it does, that is a great feeling.
2007-07-13 07:35:48 · answer #9 · answered by Dance 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you been cheated on in previous relationships? Most of the time that has alot to do with it. When we are hurt like that it makes us more prone to be insecure with ourselves, even if we have no reason to be. If there are no warning signs and nothing has changed, I wouldn't worry too much about it. Just trust that he loves you and wouldn't hurt you...
2007-07-13 07:18:15 · answer #10 · answered by Tina 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋