My friend told me she likes girls in now i feel so uncomfotable on the phone with her in stuff. I kinda dont really want to be here friend with her any more but we have been friends for a long time in we cant just stop being friends even though we are kinda starting to talk less when i used ot see her everyday in call her eveyday. I cant belive i didnt know shes my bestfriend in now things are gonna be strange
2007-07-13 07:09:10 · 12 answers · asked by Amazing nonspeaking mime 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
FTW i am a good friend but i kinda have a problem with dikes lesbos you get it in she know that but im working on getting over that
2007-07-13 07:22:28 · update #1
She is still the same person. Just talk to her about it, as I'm sure she wouldn't want things to be uncomfortable between you. Please try to support your friend, as she will probably need you now more than ever.
Mattress money is a clone.
2007-07-13 07:20:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I know exactly how you feel! When I was in my twenties, a friend of mine confessed the same to me. It made me very uncomfortable because I started wondering if the reason she told me was because she was in love with me!
Another problem you are probably having is worrying that people will think you two are lovers, once they learn that she is a lesbian, if you two keep hanging out together! People assumed that my friend and I were lovers which wasn't the case. Her friendship was so rewarding and important at the time that it didn't matter to me much, although I have to admit it did make me a bit uncomfortable at particular times.
The best thing to do is have a sincere conversation with your friend where you can make your position and feelings very clear! Tell her that you are feeling confused and shocked and that it will take you some time to get over what she has told you. Also make sure to tell her that you are NOT interested and that you will appreciate it if she refrains from making passes at you! Furthermore, you need to tell her that you are feeling very uncomfortable with the idea that she is a lesbian! If you disapprove of that lifestyle for religious or moral reasons, tell her exactly how you feel!
There is a possiblity that your friend is going through a phase and simply needs a friend like you to help her work through it.
My best advice is to treat her as you would want to be treated given your circumstances were reversed. However, if she fails to respect the bounderies you establish, then you can abandon the relationship without having to feel guilty (as long as you have made your position very clear).
2007-07-13 15:05:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off - don't say lesbos and dykes. That is disrespectful.
What you need to do is this:
Every day, go over to her house and just talk about regular stuff with her. After about a week, it will sink in to the emotional part of you that this person is the same person she has always been.
If you are afraid she might say something about dating you, just grin and say right out, "Hey, just as long as you don't tell me you want to date ME, I'm happy."
2007-07-13 14:32:20 · answer #3 · answered by Tina Goody-Two-Shoes 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if u just talk im sure it would help i mean if shes ur bff and ur hers then im sure shes really scared that u wont talk to her (ik thats what im afraid of) and if affter the talk i still feel weird about it then no 1 is forcing u to b friends w/ her *i think its wrong to insult
some 1 that is trying to ask something there confused about ik if i was asking a ? i wouldnt want to b called a f*** dyke* hope i helped
2007-07-13 15:00:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Does she act any differently? If she's not coming on to you, why should it make a difference? She is the same person you knew before, she just doesn't find men attractive (being one, I can understand where she's coming from). I'd say accept her for who she is, and let her know you don't like it if she makes a move on you.
2007-07-13 14:14:30 · answer #5 · answered by Daniel 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like she's better off without you. Anyone who can base changing their entire friendship on one aspect of the person is really more of an acquaintance than a friend.
2007-07-13 14:50:56 · answer #6 · answered by E_Tard 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Open your mind and stop being a whiney child. She's the same person she was before she told you. You liked that person right? Why would you not like her still? What kind of bigot are you? You're certainly NOT a very good friend.
2007-07-13 14:19:38 · answer #7 · answered by FTW 7 · 3⤊ 2⤋
ur so wrong. best friends are best friends no matter what. tell her ur straight and then well she aint gonna hit on u. is that what ur so scare about? if u love her -as a friend- u should stand by her and support her. otherwise... umm.. ur not worthy to be her friend or anyones friend. but whatever its ur life
-im not a lesbian-
2007-07-13 14:18:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
OK, when i came out to my best friend she gave me a hug and told me that she loved me no matter if i dated a man or woman. i love her like a sister and she is still my best friend and she is now married to a man and is very understanding about my lifestyle. either your her best friend or not
2007-07-13 14:18:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
Ouch, I’m actually really hurt for your friend that you would even consider not being friends with her for that reason. Its very disheartening.
2007-07-13 14:15:02 · answer #10 · answered by ♀ǐcƏ_ƇơĿƉ♀ 4 · 3⤊ 2⤋