I'm loosing my wife. Please help?

Question

For two years I had this wall that pushed my wife away, she gave and gave and for some reason I couldn't give back! I regret it and I wish I could take it back, she is the perfect woman. Well now the wall is down but it seems like its too late. I don't want to loose my wife, I love her what should I do. She told me she was empty and tired and could not give me anymore. Please help me save my marrige.

Answer 1

Open up to your wife. Let her know how sorry you are and that you want to work things out. She is empty and tired -- find some of the little things that she does, and help her out.

Help out around the house in ways you haven't before. Leave little love notes where she will find them when you aren't around. Buy her flowers and send them to her at work. Romance her like when you were dating and your relationship was first starting.

And during all of this, work with a counselor. If she isn't ready to go with you -- go by yourself and learn to deal with your 'walls'. When she sees this, she will understand that you really ARE trying and will begin to work with you.

Answer 2

Ok I cant say that I have personal experience in this but I can try to give you some good suggestions. I think that your wife and you should try taking some couples counseling or possibly join a couples counseling group therapy class. This will help you guys express your feelings more openly and it may also answer some questions. Maybe you are unaware of why this wall was put up to begin with and through counseling, a trained professional can help you figure out why. If you believe your wife is the perfect woman and you say you dont want to lose her then it is never too late to try and save your marriage. You obviously have strong feelings for each other if you have gotten married so use this counseling as an opportunity to bring those feelings back and break down the wall that has been built.

Answer 3

Your wife has been working overtime in the relationship and now it is time for you to do some of the work. I am glad you "woke up" to what you were doing before she left you because it sounds like you do still love her and want to remain married. I am sure she is tired; two years is a long time. Could you take her away, just the two of you for a vacation, even a weekend in a hotel nearby, and try to rekindle the passion that existed between you before? If you can, please do, give her this "getaway" as a reward for all her hard work and pamper her while you are there, rub her feet, run her a back, a backrub, whatever makes her feel comfy and relaxed. And talk, lots of talk about why you love her and why you want the relationship to work. If you can't do a "getaway" at least give her what you can from home. But communication is key..she has been giving for a long time and may feel like you are just trying to get more out of her so tell her that you realize what you did wrong by pushing her away and that your wall is down now and you just want a fresh start, just this once. If she is interested in staying married she will listen to reason. I truly wish you the best of luck!!

Answer 4

you messed up big time buddy. you hurt her so that she is unsure of you or what you could do next to her. Boy you are going to have to do some really big time butt kissing for a while and you are going to have to be at her beckon and call. You may even see that she will not respond to you right away since you got her to where she does not care anymore, so keep the work up if you still want her back. But then again it seems like you have done this already right? Since you said you want her back, I would think you have been doing some good things lately. Right. Well then something is wrong here. Either she loves you and she is just plain out being mean to you for all you did to her and I doubt that, then the only thing that is left here is. you have lost her and the only way you can get her back is..... Play hard to get. All women love it and we know it. So you need to stop kissing her butt for a change and just let her goa nd if she comes back to you and forgives you then don't be mean to her anymore and if she moves on, then meet a new girl and treat this one right for goodness sake! God Bless you also!

Answer 5

A woman wants to know she's loved. Right now, your wife isn't sure of that. Take your wife on a trip--a place where the two of you can be alone. Doesn't have to be a huge, expensive trip. A weekend trip is fine. Perhaps there's somewhere close by where to two of you can be alone. Make it a place with nice surroundings, perhaps an area where there's water. Once there, you need to talk to this woman. Open your heart and tell her how you feel. If she says she's tired, say that you're only asking for time--time to make things right. If you do this in the right way, your wife will forgive you. Open your heart. Otherwise, the two of you will drift apart.

Answer 6

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Answer 7

Unfortunately, the wall that you tore down your wife has build hers using the pieces from yours. Do you remember how hard it was for you to move that wall? Ok, now your wife has that hard wall. Fortunately, that wall can be broken. It's not going to be easy and it may take a while, but the wall can be moved. Not by force, but by breaking away at each level. You may be asking yourself, "How can I do that".
Sit down and talk to her; ask her does she wants to work at rebuilding things in the marriage. If she responds in a positive way, then go from there. Remember, this is not for you to fix all by yourself, you both have to work at it. Though, there will be frustrating moments when the both of you are going to want to call it quits, but you don't! You are going to have to listen closely at what she says. I'm not saying that you have to agree, just pay attention to her and listen closely, cause she's gonna tell you what she wants. If it seems fair to you then do it, if not, come to a mutual understanding. Not only should you do this for her, but she should do this for you. If she sees that you are sincere, then she will do it automatically; you won't have to tell her. I hope that you both work it out and all ends well!!!!BLESSINGS!!!

Answer 8

U will have to give give give for two yrs as she takes takes takes as u had done...perhaps she will come around sooner than u...she was hurt, made to feel undesirable by u...she isn't going to be inclined to put her heart back out there for u to reject it again. U will need to have a lot of patience n return her sarcasm with kindness. Have plenty of compliments that are REAL at the right moments. Give her small thoughtful gifts. U see a need fill it. Something needs done, do it. Make her NEED u again. Tell her, no, I got that. I'll call "them tomorrow, don't worry about it"...take some pressure n stress off her back...she will come around unless u've already been replaced...but even then, that guy may only be her 2nd choice...her 1st choice chose to ignore her for 2 yrs...good luck

Answer 9

Are you George? anyway....you sound just like a friend of mine...She always confined in my about her giving and giving but never receiving form her husband..she put so much effort into the marriage and she grew but her husband was laways in the same place...never having any goals or letting her into his life...after 10 years she has giving up and is filign for a divorce right this minute and he doesn;t even know it....Sometimes it is too late and you can't do anything to stop her...remember she gave you everything adn there comes a time when people do all they can and they get wore out.. Go to counseling and let her see that you are willing to change,

Answer 10

What i believe you should do is talk to her, explain what was wrong! 2 years is a LONG time to haev a wall up to someone that you love. All i can say is now you have to try and undo what you have already done. Take her out and show her that she still means everything to you. You can't take back what you did but you can make everything better between you two!