how do i tell my husband i want a divorce ? everytime i start to tell him he cries. than i feel sorry i said i

Question

my husband has been married 7 other times ,Im the 8th
he is very immature, blames me for everything and expects me to
work and provide for him .He constantly loses his jobs i've had one job since movng back to bakesfield, , He manages one job a month (9) that 's how long we've been back here He has managed to get himself thrown out of my daughters house , to never set foot in it again. IEvery time we argue he tells me I am going o go back to working as a hooker again (that 's how I met him) He has admitted to sleeping with other women and went as far as moving to nc for a month with his ex- or not so ex. They renteda motel room and tried to tell me he slept in a different bed.. She (ex) said differently.
so How do I tell this man G O G E T O U T O F M Y L i F E?

Answer 1

I think he is good for nothing and he controls you by acting. Leave him. A man eight times married and does not change is not a man.

Answer 2

There is a process happening here: 1. You argue. 2. He asks for a divorce. 3. You get upset and cry. 4. He apologizes. 5. You accept, but hold onto the resentment. So, break the cycle. When he says he wants a divorce, the proper response is obviously not tears, because you know he doesn't mean it. Why would you cry over something you should completely, 100% know he does not mean? If your husband's favorite "joke" was telling you your shoe was untied, how many times would you keep looking down before you stopped? I mean, after awhile, you'd realize it wasn't true, right? So why does "I want a divorce" have to be any different? When are you going to stop being fooled by such silliness? You don't have to keep playing his game if you don't want to. If you quit taking his divorce statements seriously, the cycle changes: 1. You argue. 2. He asks for a divorce. 3. You laugh and say, "I've heard that one before!" 4. Not feeling upset, you redirect the argument away from emotional silliness, and back to problem solving. Once you stop the destructive cycle of fighting in hurtful ways, you'll be able to discuss anything constructively, including your sex life.

Answer 3

You just have to walk away. If this guy has been married 7 other times then you can see that you CAN divorce him. He'll boo hoo and pitch a *****, but you have to do what you have to do. Okay, so you don't like to see him cry.........do you like to see YOU cry. I'm sure he's been the cause of many tears falling from your eyes. Your relationship is over and you might as well start acting like it. People don't change, and so don't expect him to. Either kick him out (It shouldn't make a difference on your house hold income. You say he doesn't work) or you move out. There's no more talking for you to. It's time to take action. Get the hell out of there lady. Good luck. Don't you think that it's time that you find happiness? I'm sure you deserve it.

Answer 4

oh gee, the whole not being able to keep a job thing sounds exactly like my last boyfriend. I had started to date him while he was in high school and didn't know that about him until after he graduated and he kept saying jobs were too difficult... blah
You just need to take a stand and tell him to get out..

As for you saying that you are going to go work as a hooker again... why? It sounds like you are able to keep the job you have currently, and if he has expected you to take care of both him and yourself, without him you should be able to provide for yourself and yourself alone just fine.

DITCH THE LOSER

Answer 5

Just like that. I want out and I am getting a divorce. Or just go talk to a divorce lawyer and let him get served the papers after you move out. After I found out he was married 7 times I would never have married him, but now you should help yourself out and get the divorce. Why take care of a grown man who doesnt want anything out of life. He needs to be single so he can play with whoever he wants to and needs to learn to stand on his own 2 feet. You should have left his sorry butt when he left to go to NC.

Answer 6

Plain and simple..."I want a divorce this isn't working"
When he turns on the tears tell him..."No! Crying isn't going to change my mind. Do you know how many times you've hurt me and made me cry and not cared?!"
He is insensitive to your feelings and needs and when somebody treats you like that, you shouldn't be concerned about theirs. It will be hard, I'm sure, but you'll have to be strong if you want to better yourself from it.
Good Luck!

Answer 7

You must be enjoying his antics.You are trying to dress a pig in the best jewelry you own,get a lawyer and just file.go to your daughter's and give him a month to move out.It shouldn't be that difficult for him co's he has been practicing for a while

Answer 8

Then DO IT!
His breaking down into tears is a control mechanism. He knows you'll feel sorry for him and cave in to him.
He doesn't have your best interests in mind, so you have to. Just make up your mind to do it, tears be damned, then stick to it. Don't cave in.
(Don't be shocked when he suddenly quits crying once he realizes you're not falling for it. Its all an act to keep you on the string.)
Good luck.

Answer 9

Get on with your life..don't waste another minute. BTW - don't worry...he'll find wife number 9 very shortly. That may sound unkind, but you must think of yourself. Marriage is a partnership....and he's wanting a Mommy.

Answer 10

honey, run away very fast!!!! just because you used to be a hooker doesn't mean you are destined to be a hooker. he has failed and he wants to pull you down with him. don't let that happen, be a strong woman who wants more for herself. don't let his fake tears sway you from what you know is right. you're better that this regardless of what he says and what you used to be. we all have low points in our lives but we overcome and make ourselves better. good luck!!!!