My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 1/2 years. We love eachother very much, but we discovered that we are in a rut, and are trying to work past it. There are some things we've decided to change, like not calling eachother ALL the time, and going on more dates instead of laying around the house. Any other advice on how to bring the spark back into a serious relationship?
2007-07-13 02:36:52 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Do something togeather that was like a sper of the moment thing... I did that with mine and walking around a night with a full moon was VERY romantic...
2007-07-13 02:40:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a good analysis of your relationship. It is good because it is the state where most relatonships go and all marriages go.
The problem is to keep an interesting situation by constantly improving .
You improve as indivu=iduals and as a couple. You have to ask other older people what they did to keep their loving relationships sparky.
Start a hobby: something you really love and let your friend into it. also your friend should start something he really likes and let you into it. There are thousands of things to do so you could start something every month and add interest this way.
Trouble will come. Trouble means that you are ready for a better and deeper relationship. Trouble does not mean you are thru with each other. After a disagreement, the friendship gets better. You do not have to try to stir up trouble or , for example make each other jealous. Enough distress will come without trying.
2007-07-21 00:50:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really like "wellbeing" 's answer.
Pretend it is a NEW relationship! Dates are a GREAT idea!
You obviously cannot "forget" everything you already know about your boyfriend, but in a sense, start over.
Find out NEW things about each other, do new things in bed, go places you both have never been before (together or apart), play 20 questions, but make it 50 questions, of 67 questions!! :)
There are plenty of ways to re-new a relationship! Your love will be the remaining factor, and will keep you two together.
Laugh your hearts out, eat until you pass out, try something NEW together that will strengthen your bond with each other!
GOOD LUCK and HAVE FUN!!!
<3
2007-07-13 09:47:25 · answer #3 · answered by yourluvbug2003 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ahhhh, yes the romance is starting to fade after the two years. Now the test to find out if you two really love each other or you were just attracted to each other for the sex or the money,, well you got the point. Start doing new things together. Put yourselves in new situations like learn how to rock climb or sail, wind surf, take a class together. You lives are becoming boring and you are starting to "get old" and aging and getting old are two different things. So get a life,, together and find out more about each other, things that you yourself did not even know you can do. Get out there and live life together. If you love each other as much as you say you do,, you will get through it. Otherwise this could be that stage in your togetherness if you are meant to live a long and worthwhile life together,, or not. Regardless, best to both of you.
2007-07-13 09:46:46 · answer #4 · answered by jorge e 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What a fun question! Start treating your relationship as if it were a brand new relationship - starting with yourself. Take extra time getting ready to spend time together, feel pretty and dress nicely. Talk to him as if you don't know him so well because chances are, things have changed that you might not even know about. Has his favorite color/food/world views changed? Ask questions and get to know him again. You can also start a "wish" jar of romantic gestures - once a week, you each pick a gesture (They can be very small, and not thing you have to buy, or more elaborate...) do the gesture for each other without telling them what it is you are supposed to do - make it a fun game.
2007-07-13 09:41:20 · answer #5 · answered by wellbeing 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes don't give him any sex for a while and we a bit cold to your man. But be nice at the same time. Tell your man that you need some time to your self. He will be all over you for sure. Good luck to you. I do not know why but when men have something they are not to interested but when they think they are have a challenge then they are all into you. Could be the testosterone who knows. I seen it happen to many times in my own life. When I love a guy and treat hin good then he treats me like crap but, when I am not into the guy that much, then he loves me all the way? LOL So I have incorporated that in my relationships and now my dear friend I am having the time of my life and so will you if you do what I have sugested. Good luck to you and God Bless you to!
2007-07-13 09:45:18 · answer #6 · answered by SecretUser 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can dress up for him.. not in a kiny way but get something nice on both of you.. lil black dress and him in best shirt. Make an effort like its the first date. get ready seperate places and meet up and really talk to one and other, Have a laugh. Go dancing and get close and dirty on the dancefloor.
Also doing things like swimming, walking, camping daft things like that not only boosted my and my man life ( we lost weight made me feel sexier, spent more time interacting with one and other - BUT also sex in the changing rooms at swimming RED HOT, camping sex WOW etc etc) do thing different from the norm break the routines and find new things to do and talk about oyu will be fine love.
2007-07-13 09:42:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
dont get into any routines and maybe finding other things to do with your girlfriends instead of everything with him. what did you do before you starting going together? did you have any hobbies. everyone should have their own stuff to do along with things together. people get used to each other after they have been together so shake thing up a bit. the element of surprise and spur of the moment things is what i like. take him lunch or take him out for lunch things like that is what i like. maiking love outside under the stars or just toudching each other cuddling and kissing with no intercourse sometimes. different different different is the key here i believe. don't think the grass gets greener on the other side because it doesn't.
2007-07-13 10:35:58 · answer #8 · answered by CHOPPER 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
me and my boyfriend just hit the two year mark too, and are having the same problem! yes, its easy to fall into that rut, especially after you each spend a day at work!
Here's what we are trying:
1) do more outside of the home: nature parks, biking, camping, rollerblading, going to ceramics places becuase i want to go and paint things (yay!) or to boat shows because he wants to see them
2) make sure he plans things.. .i've noticed with guys, they fall short on dates, and that leaves little excitement
3) go out to a nice dinner, at his request. Make sure he knows how important it is that he reccommends an activity... you will btoh feel better for it. no dishes, no food prep, no grocery shopping... just relax
4) teach each other new things.... say he's into religions, have him teach about his favorite aspects of them.. you're into photography, teach him about how to use a camera
5) just realize that its not necessarily a bout money, but about quality time, and as i think yuo've realized.. you can't have quality time if all you have is time together doing nothing. a little time apart does benefit you. find a life outside of each other so you can be more gratified with your life together!
i wish you the best of luck..i really realy do. i hope both of us can make our relationships work out how we want.. becuase i dont' think either of us suffers from a shortage of caring about our boyfriends!
2007-07-18 13:45:20 · answer #9 · answered by OhioFantastic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do things you used to do when you first started dateing. That will bring back some good memories as well as a good time
2007-07-19 04:08:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋