Too "Ghetto"?

Question

I have a friend (she's African-American) who is pregnant with her first child. She's having a girl and has picked out a few names:

Sequioa (Se-coy-ah)
Tarnesha (Tar-nee-shah)
Laquesha (La-kee-shah)
Tarmay
Rakaye (Ray-Kay-Ay)

She wants my honest opinion and I personally think these names are way too "ghetto". I think her child would be judged by her name. I don't know how to tell my friend this because I'm white and she may think I'm racist.

Honestly what do you think of and picture when you hear these names? What would you tell her?

Answer 1

I see what you mean... I too associate those names as being "ghetto" and I am no way a racist.

I'm sure though the name wouldn't hold the child back if she was brought up in a loving environment and was respectful and caring to the people around her.

However you should be honest with your friend and tell her that they aren't names you would choose and perhaps she may be stereotyping her child. Being pregnant, she no doubt would be offended and it may effect your relationship. If it were me I'd tell her I just didn't like the names. After all, the final decision is hers. Just be a good friend and stand by her.

Answer 2

Although I agree those names do sound GHETTO, I would avoid actually saying that. You should probably use another approach to get your point across. I too believe that the name you choose can have a big impact on your child. Maybe tell your friend that you are worried that the child's name will be constantly misspelled or mispronounced by others. If she's really a close friend a values your opinion she will appreciate your honesty. Maybe you can buy her a baby names book and offer to help her pick out some names? Good luck!

Answer 3

well i think sequioa is the best way to go and i like the name it sounds kind of cool but the rest are really ghetto. Laquesha especially which will probably be what she goes for because she probably wants it to be ghetto. I'd tell her my opinion but people have minds of their own and will do what they want so the most you can do is sit back and watch her make these mistakes.

Answer 4

What EXACTLY did she ask you?

If she asked, "do you think these names sound too ghetto?" then I think you can answer her honestly and say yes.

If she just asked "what do you think of these names?" then I think you might answer more carefully, perhaps something like, "well, honestly I am not really crazy about any of those, but if they're something you like, go for it!"

If she wants to know why you don't like them, you might say you think because they are such unique names, she might be saddling her kid with a hard-to-spell, hard-to-pronounce name for the rest of her life.

I don't have an uncommon name, but my parents spelled it differently, and no one EVER spells it right. EVER. It has been a thorn in my side since I was a kid.

You could also talk to her about how cruel kids can be as they get older, and how giving her child an unusual name may actually cause problems for her later.

She asked for your honest opinion, so I think it's ok to be as honest as possible, within the parameters of protecting your friendship and being thoughtful at the same time.

Answer 5

Even if they aren't your taste, I would never tell her that they are too "ghetto". That does sound racist. However, she did ask for your opinion, so maybe you could tell her that you think that maybe they are a bit too ethnic for your taste, but that if her culture is something that she wants to portray through the child, then she's hit the mark. You will have to remember that she is hormonal and since every name she chose is along the same lines, it must be what she likes. It's unlikely that if you tell her you think that they are ghetto that she will name the baby Jane. I would be honest, but CAREFULLY honest. :)

Answer 6

Honestly, like you, I think they are way too ghetto, and that her daughter will be judged unfairly because of her name. Instead of straight out saying that the names are too ghetto, tell her that they aren't your style and suggest some other names that you like. If she prefers her own names, there's nothing you can do. It's her baby and she gets to pick the name, even if you think that it's unfair to the baby. Good luck and be prepared for some serious negotiating!

Answer 7

Sequioa is the name of a car.
I also think that they are as you stated ghetto. I like the name Tarmay is sounds more African history and not ghetto! Though it is really your friends choice I named my two boys what I wanted and didn't care what anyone else thought!
Good luck... I also like Tomica "not sure how you would spell that tough"

Answer 8

No the names are not ghetto...for all of you who decide to say they are ghetto do you really know what ghetto is. I am a from the caribbean and these names are not unfamiliar..i mean people over here dont name there child kate, elizabeth, jack, mary jane and those names because we find them to be old fashion and believe me a child will be tease if her name is elizabeth cause that sounds grannyish. So let your friend name her baby whatever she wants.

Answer 9

Honestly the names are too ghetto. Princeton did a study that proved that people with names that were considered too "ghetto" were often discriminated against with jobs. (I included a link to the study for proof) Suggest that your friend give her child a somewhat normal first name and then give the child any middle name from the list that she wants.

Answer 10

you dont sound like you have ever been within 50 miles of a ghetto so what makes u an expert on which names are "ghetto" and which arent?

let her name her child what she wants.