how to handle an alcoholic husband?

Answer 1

Don't. Divorce him.

EDIT - Before considering Alanon, decide whether you (and your children, if you have any) really want to give up one or more evenings a week to sit in a room with other emotionally damaged people discussing how to handle what is someone else's problem, when you could be out having fun and meeting new people who don't have that problem.

Answer 2

Hi there Lea, I am sorry to hear that you have an alcoholic husband. It must be very difficult for you! I had an alcoholic father, so Iknow what you are going through. I also know that, once a person is an alcoholic, they will always be an alcoholic. Some go on to recover and get off of the drink, but alot never do. Your husband will need to be able to admit that he has got a problem, and be active in attempting to give up and stay off the booze. It may be an idea to get some advice from alcoholics anonymous. They will certainly be able to guide you in the right direction. I wish you all the best :o) x
www.alcoholicsanonymous.org.uk

Answer 3

You need to get help for YOU! Alcoholism is a family disease and affects those that love the alcoholic as much as the person who is drinking.
He needs to handle himself. Do not make excuses for him, fix what he screws up or take on his responsibilities.
Try this site: http://www.al-anonfamilygroups.org/meetings/meeting.html

Alanon is a free support system designed to follow the prinicples of Alcoholics Anonymous and help you to live a healthy life even though you love an alcoholic! Tough love is a part of the program and learning how not to be the enabler is another.
Be good to you and know this is not your fault, it is a disease- like diabetes or cancer. There is no cure, but there is hope! And finding other people that live with this is a relief!
Good luck and prayers for a better tomorrow.

Answer 4

Only the alcoholic can help himself by choosing to quit drinking.

If it gets to be too much for you, you can issue an ultimatum and tell him either he gets sober, or you'll divorce him. Be ready to follow through with your threats.

Attend AlAnon meetings. They're for the family and friends of alcoholics and offers you support you need.

I have a friend who's an alcoholic and she will not admit she has a problem, even though I'm the only friend she has left. She drinks all day, every day and ruins everything. Her husband is divorcing her because he realises there is no hope for her if she won't help herself. It is very sad.

Answer 5

Alcohol is a very addicting habbit and if he truely is a alcoholi the only way to handle this is to get him help and it will be hard for him and he has to be willing, you need to sit down and have a talk with him, don't go all crazy and act mad, that will just make him defensive and not want to listen, be calm and tell him you love him but you would like him to get some help, the first sighn of alcoholism is denial, he may say he doesn't have a promblem, but tell him, even if he doesnt' think so to get help just for your piece of mind, have him take some AA class's....if he truely loves you he will listen and hopefully be willing to work on this...good luck to ya.

Answer 6

As has been said before, it's a disease. You will have very little chance of doing anything about it on your own. Alanon, the other side to AA, will be a good place to start. You need to ensure that you are looking after yourself in all this. Through the help and support of others going through exactly the same situations (yes it happens to a whole lot of other people!!) can you start the long road to recovery. Only if he wants to help himself will anything change. Alanon helped me (well alateen, as my mother is an alcoholic, sober over 20 years now though) and it's not all about God, but believing in a higher power, however you see that. Look them up in the phone book or over the internet.
Good luck, it will get better.

Answer 7

Perhaps by accepting that change will only come when he is ready....not when you are. I had an alcoholic for a Father (now deceased) and over the years us kids and my mum went on and on at him about what he wa doing to his liver, us as a family etc and until my Dad decided 6 years before he died that he was going to stop (well done for that Dad) all our nagging etc was entirely pointless. The only suggestion I have is that occasionally when a person with alcohol problems realises the state of their Liver this sometimes is the sounding bell that they need to accept its the booze or an early grave, and they give it their best shot at stopping. If you could persuade him to have a liver function test it might be an idea. Goodluck to you x

Answer 8

There is no way you can "handle or try controlling" your alcholic husband, because he is under an evil curse, thru Satan, the devil. Sounds crazy, but this is the truth.

No need to be afraid of him, being this way. Instead, the only way you will gain control back into your marriage life, is to ask God for help, by accpeting Him into your life (thru Jesus Christ) and then, pray for him. But, encourage you, if you are not a believer, yet . . to become become a believer.

This is the only way. God, thru believing in Jesus Christ and His Father's teachings in the Bible, is the One who can control the evil things that goes on with people, in this world.

Continue to love, and support him, as much as possible. Seek God's help, become a believer, and pray for your husband. Your husband is under Satan's control, not God's.

Divorce is not the answer to your marital problems . .Satan (God's enemy, as well as man's) is.

I will pray for you. . .

Angela

Answer 9

i have been there before. my husband used to drink and do drugs everyday, and go to the strip clubs behind my back, i had to leave him, then when i came back to him i set some rules for are relationship, like we were going to see a councelar for are marriage problems, and he had to go to his a.a. meetings daily, and work the steps, and get in vlolved in church as a family. and he did all these things not because i told him to but he was tired of drinking and druging and wanted a better way of life, and now we have it i must say. we cannot make are husbands get the help but we can show them love and not be a door mat at the same time. he needs alcaholics anonymous meetings. and counceling to. and having a relationship with jesus christ always works.

Answer 10

simple answer,you carn't if he is unable to change or just wont you will just waste your life proping him up.He will also try to turn you into an alcoholic so you don't get on his case.
My advice is see if he is willing to change if not walk away for your own sake .You canno't have a life with an alcoholic,they are self destructive.