My wife has been a truant. She left me after 6 months of our marriage to stay with her parents (we were in relationship for 4 years before getting married). I went after her many a times, took counselling but the last time she ran away i didn't go after her.
Last she told me she wanted a divorce however she calls me up or text msgs me every few days. i think she is finding a reason to talk to me and this confuses me a lot.
Pl. help
2007-07-12 18:29:24 · 14 answers · asked by bebe 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Vivi
You are right. We used to meet my wife's aunt who is a behavioral expert (Dean at a premier bschool). And my wife got a good amount of firing from her as well. So ofcourse this is not a one sided account.
Other: -
-She calls me up for no real reason.
-i do agree she showed no committment and all that was important to her was partying and entertainment
2007-07-12 18:48:26 · update #1
Good Morning BeBe...It's difficult to really answer your question without knowing more details on "why" she left. What was her reasoning on leaving after 6 months? She must have told you something. Also for someone who likes to party, I'm surprised she went back to her parents house to reside, since parents have a tendency to be on the strict side and are overly protective at times. Your wife sounds to me that even though you had a relationship of four yrs. that she wasn't ready for the commitment of marriage. Her behavior seems to be very immature. Also, if she is constantly sending messages to you, maybe she has some guilt feelings or some type of remorse in the breakup. She wants to come back but yet she doesn't. She wants one thing but yet another. In other words, she's not sure what she wants. For instance, it might be that she wants you but yet she wants her freedom too. Like a child wanting their cake and candy too at the same time. It's been said that distance makes the heart grow fonder...now maybe since she's at her parents house that being away from you has placed an impact on her emotions and she's rethinking about the situation. This could be a possibility. Another possibility could be that some women after a breakup or separation feel lonely and the closeness of being with their husband/bf is gone so they have mixed feelings and they want that closeness back but yet they want their freedom to do what they want and their own life too so this is what I think might be going on with their wife. You need to decide whether you want to continue this marriage or not and if its salvagable.Not only is she confused herself on her feelings but yet at the same time she's playing with your emotions which isn't fair to you. You might want to meet her somewhere to have lunch or just to talk and tell her how you feel on this issue and point blank tell her that she comes back home and the both of you try to rectify the problems together or stop messaging you and get a divorce to where you can move on. Tell her you want to stop these kid games she playing and start being a mature adult. Hope this has helped. Have a good day!
2007-07-13 01:40:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her the divorce. She only wants you when she thinks that you might not be coming after her. Once you reach the age to marry, mind games should be a thing of the past. If she wants to act like a high school girl, let her do it...alone.
2007-07-12 18:41:00 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had to accept the fact, my ex-husband wanted trouble and he still stewing in his own **** - now he is swimming in a deep sewer hole. He is presently getting sued for child support for 8 bastards that are not his with a crack addict.
Yeah Yeah he ran away too and tried to come back but you are the one in control.
If I were you, I would change my cell phone number and move on - don't look back. Think and study the patterns in your relationship, you can choose to live like that for the rest of your life and it is noway to live. Life is a personal choice, continue to chase your little girl who should be a grown women by now.
I found a man that wants to be with me for the rest of my life.
M A R K her words of divorce and let her play her own little reindeer game alone.
Take her text messaging anyway you choose, but for one thing live like a yo-yo or on amerry round and when is your abrupt landing??
Just choose to work on yourself, I believe that you have to concentrate on you. This happened to me too and I ended up out growing my ex-husband due to counselling and school of hard knocks ---knock knock anybody home!!
2007-07-12 18:50:31 · answer #3 · answered by Emily L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like she just doesnt want to grow up. She may not be ready to be married. I'll bet she doesnt handle responsibility real well. Does she handle a job and pay any bills? does she help out around the house? If the answer is no and no..... the it seems that you may have picked the fruit before it ripened!!
2007-07-12 18:58:18 · answer #4 · answered by mpasnick 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
can it really be she isnt in love with you? if you have gone after her many times, it appears she isnt happy with something that is going on in your marriage. maybe counseling didnt help, should you go again? its easy to see that there are two sides to this story. maybe you can meet her on a neutral ground, like a coffee shop and have a quiet conversation about your and her future. obviously, you wont force anyone to stay if they really dont want to.
2007-07-12 18:37:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is not any reason for alarm as long as no infidelities have befell. i could advise which you take a seat alongside with your spouse and communicate approximately her new stumbled on id. enable her comprehend the way you fell approximately it, does it turn you on, does it situation you? i think of that communique is going to be the only element that is going to be waiting to get you the solutions which you're searching for. in case you think of that it is attractive while she does this then tell her that.
2016-10-01 12:24:29 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you two still in counseling? If not, I say give it one more go, but if she still is serious about the divorse (and not manipulating you), then just give it to her. It will be painful, but as painful of living the rest of your life with a women who keeps leaving you and wanting a divorce, and then manipulating you?
2007-07-12 18:34:01 · answer #7 · answered by natureutt78 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
feel lucky and make a clean break change your number you have tried but now you need to find a healthy relationship but I would advise a time by yourself first go out with your guy friends
have a happy life
2007-07-12 18:34:20 · answer #8 · answered by Cheryl J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honostly it seems as though your wife is afraid of the commitment. does she have a history of running away from situations often? maybe in time she will come to her senses but if not then don't worry. if its meant to be it will be and if not then it will not be.
2007-07-12 18:36:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is she talking to you about?I mean is there a real reason for her to contact you?Does she make sence?Just ask her what does she want from you?
2007-07-12 18:35:05 · answer #10 · answered by avavu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋