Marriage is a lose lose scenario for men nowadays, why then some guys still see marriage as an option.?? Are these men do not know what marriage is like or they do not read the news ?? I would like to know that ...
2007-07-12 17:37:48 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hey bro,.... It is a Loose loose situation. I'm gonna defend your statements from some of these over emotional negative posts you've recieved. You're just asking an honest question. This is gonna take a minute,.............
If marriage was such a great idea for guys then why did Smart Money magazine put out an article advising men to have an iron clad prenup?
You don't need someone to complete you. If you do then you are a total looser. Make your own happiness. Aside from your parents and teachers, no one is responsible for your success in life but you! Having someone in your life is okay but never feel as though you can't function without them. that is for the weak and lame. Don't buy into a great woman makes a great man crap either. Be your own person. A good woman may compliment you or reinforce your relationship but she didn't make you. My girlfriend doesn't make me and never will! she compiments me. Using STDs as a reason to mary is a lame excuse. Most people who cheat are married. There are many cases of wives/ husbands coming up with STDs because of their spouses extramarital activities. Always wear condoms .
Yahoo just headlined a story yesterday saying wifes have more control in marriages then men, Why? Because the men became pussified and roll over for them.
So your right, marriage for guy/ gal is a loosing proposition. most women will never say anything bad about marriage because they have the most to gain from it. Married guys won't say any because they will be cut off (see Yahoo story) and will have hell to pay. These people will always criticize you for being an independent thinker, and quote the Bible doing it. The Bible never said give half of your pension, 401k, stock options, house , Business etc to your spouse if the marriage goes south.
The reason why some of these posts against you are so negative because They, not you are miserable and and wish they can start over again. They can't see any other logical reason because "everybody does it" "You're immature if you want to keep your assets yours so you won't have to start over at 57 years old because of divorce". "Shame on you for not wanting to PAY for another grown person so she can stay home while you go to work five days a week." See how that sounds now? Jealousy is a horrible thing.
All I know I'm very happy being single. And wouldn't change it for the world! You don't have to look far to find reasons not to get married. Just hang out and read some of these questions being posted. That in and of itself is should be enough to tell anybody it ain't worth it. Money is one thing, the stress and anxiety cased by these bad relationships is LIFE SHORTENING. You can't put a price on peice of mind can you?
All in the name of Love.
2007-07-12 19:41:56 · answer #1 · answered by flack vest 2 · 1⤊ 4⤋
Through no fault of your own, you have no experience, knowledge or wisdom about an adult lifestyle you are just a teenager. You could not possibly possess what it takes to lead an adult lifestyle because you are not an adult. Like you said, you are "only 17" -- and want to marry when you turn 18. Between now and then you will never gain the lifestyle of an adult. Just because you can legally marry does not mean you are actually emotionally and financially ready to do so. If you can furnish a place to live and pay for, without help, your automobile along with maintenance repairs and gasoline, auto insurance premiums, your own phone, electricity, heat, rent, food and clothing, then you are ready to lead an adult lifestyle. Oh, and have a full time job or at least a part time job while taking a few college courses. Can you do that? If not, you are not ready to get married. So, you are in love -- nothing wrong with that. You are so sure about this boy that you want to spend the rest of your life with him? Whelp, this is your life now and you are with him, right? Sooo, what is the rush to marry this boy? You have a lot of living to do before you become a mature adult who can handle responsibilities. Right now most things are easy for you because you are dependent on your parents, financially and emotionally. Life changes mighty quick when you move away from home. But, you see it all through a throbbing heart beat and have absolutely no real idea of what you are getting yourself into. Because, sweetheart, if you really were mature, you would not be making this decision. Your parents and your relatives are right. Sometimes others know what is best for you because you do not possess the life skills to know better yourself. And, that is what is happening right here and right now. So, grow up (and I do not mean this in a snotty or cruel way), enjoy this special time. Learn who you are and what you want. Set current goals to improve your life: example -- education, a job, a career. Some things you just need to do for yourself so you can select your path in life. And, you need not be married to do so, especially since you are only a teenager. So, go out and explore who you want to be and save the serious stuff like engagement and marriage for when you are personally set in an adult lifestyle.
2016-05-21 04:01:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not always a lose lose situation. I know that it may seem to be the case, but that isn't reality. I know many, many happily married men that love their wives and children. As for reading the news, they only publish the bad stuff if you haven't noticed. Rarely do you see anything on the news that is upbeat. I love marriage and wouldn't trade my husband and children for anything in the world.
2007-07-12 17:44:14 · answer #3 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is, in this day and age, practically meaningless. Hardly anything in the relationship changes because of the wedding vows, and it does indeed leave both partners--but especially the male--open to some stinging nastiness if things go south.
People say that many people are "happily married"; I don't really see the relevance in this statement. The relationship they have, not the wedding vows, is the cause of their happiness.
2007-07-12 18:52:49 · answer #4 · answered by Mike 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The cynics of our society can't help but parade the consequences of failed marriages. However, they rarely mention the statistics that show married men are actually happier than single men and tend to live longer than their single counterparts.
All marriages have their ups and downs, it's true. However, when you have two mature and committed people who marry, the chances of them being happy are greater and so they are better able to weather the bad times and come out of it stronger.
True, there are people who shouldn't marry -- especially if their views on women and marriage in general are so skewed. Nonetheless, there are millions of men who would classify themselves as happily married so I don't see the "lose/lose" situation that you cite.
2007-07-12 17:55:45 · answer #5 · answered by JC 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Because some "REAL" men actually believe in marital vows and owning up to comitments they make and believe in family and children and not just getting any woman pregnant so that kids have to suffer with out a father in their lives ..
REAL men make good choices in their life and would realize that marriage is a very serious decision and would need to take a hard look at who they are intending to marry going based more on the "fairytale" of it all and what she looked like and if shes good in the sack.. a real man would look at years down the road, is this the woman i want to be the mother of my children does she have the qualities to be the kind of mother id hope she'd be, he'd look at 50 years down the road when sex and looks fade.. and ask him if he actually really enjoys her company her friendship etc.. and once he commits does he have what it takes in himself to give all of himself to commit to this marriage, and does she have firm beliefs in the commitmen of marriage herself and has she shown any signs of being anything but faithful and his best friend..
REAL MEN know what it takes to be married, REAL MEN know the difference of what it takes in another person to be married..
ONLY imature men would make statements like you have.. and the problem with society is that it seems ALOT of men and WOMEN.. want things to be easy these days and when they figure out that marriage isnt a "fairytale" or a "romance novel" they want to head for the hills, with out looking back.. because now a days u can get a divorce if the person ur with sneezes wrong.. theres no real consequence by society anymore, divorce is the typical.. and as long as people think nothing of marriage, commitment, and family , this will continue..
2007-07-12 17:50:26 · answer #6 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Why do you say its a lose lose scenario?
I think that there are a lot of men that are very happy...maybe they don't put those kinds of stories in the news....just the bad ones.
2007-07-12 17:40:16 · answer #7 · answered by Andrea 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can tell you why getting married is more of an advantage!
If you really love a woman you will want to spend the rest of your life with her. There is something really really very sweet and very special about it. If you love her you will really feel proud about her and even about yourself. You will be self confident and will have less problems with people. Another advantage is that when you grow older you can be proud of your family (your wife and kids) and be happy you have created a family line. You will not be lonely (you dont necessarily have to be living with your kids but you know you have archieved something by having them). They could be a source of help in many ways.
If you disagree with all these then you must have a problem.
If you exchange women everytime just because you dont wanna get married then your will get into greater danger not just from the enemies you make by exchanging females, but for health reasons too.
And children who are living with people who are not their parents can also have problems with you. Think about it dude dont get decieved with false ideas from from people who live a false life....
Be real dude we are living in a real world!
2007-07-12 17:46:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
It' a lose lose situation for ppl like you that are afraid of commitment, Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free. Fortunately the tide is turnig back to marriage becaue more people are willing to wait for marriage before they have sex. which is eventually gonna leave asses like you out in the cold with the hookers
2007-07-12 17:49:11 · answer #9 · answered by ogopogo 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Why because u are not complete my dear unless u have a companion.U will fall in true love! ull realise what u have been missing and know u dont want to live life alone. throw caution to the wind and stop being scary let someone in u'll find that despite the pain that love sometimes bring you are better to love a litte then never at all.
2007-07-12 17:45:24 · answer #10 · answered by Caroline 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋