Im gay and homophobic?

Question

im 18 and i know im gay and i know most ppl now dont care but i hate being gay and all the drags and guys acting liek girls stuff... it kinda gives me creeps i wanna accept it but its hard

Answer 1

you can still be gay and be straight acting. just be yourself.

Answer 2

Hey Kiddo: There are so many elements to the the Gay community that you probably haven't had the opportunity to explore. We come in all types, like any other segment of the population. Just be mindful of Gay history, it was the drag queens and the effeminate men, who stood up against the New York Police Department at a bar called the Stonewall Inn on a hot June night in 1969. Gay people were regularly harassed by law enforcement, sometimes just for being Gay. Just remember this when you think of them with disdain. Your Gay a** owes them a debt of gratitude. Enough of my lecture. First of all get over this I hate being Gay crap.The more time your spend at that pity party, the more f**ked up your life will be. You want to hang with masculine men ? They are out there. Are you into sports? Join a gay sports team. There are Gay men just like yourself in this world. You have to seek them out. Good luck finding your gay niche.

Answer 3

I think as you get out there and mix with people you'll get over the discomfort. I had the same sort of feelings, and I think it was based really, as you say in, homophobia- sort of a hangover of feelings that you don't want to be gay and a dislike of other gays for that reason. But when you find people out there who accept you and validate you as a the person you are, it's the greatest feeling imagineable- it's like finally finding your home.
I have no desire to have sex with a drag queen, but I understand their need to be accepted for who they are because I went through the same thing myself as a masculine gay man. I'm also not really attracted sexually to men who're effeminate, but let me tell you something that happened to me recently.
As a middle-aged divorced man, I'm really only now starting to mix in the gay community. I was at a bar I've never been to before with a friend. We were sitting at the bar and an effeminate young man came up behind me, introduced himself and we talked for a few minutes. Then he apologized for "bothering" me and said that he just wanted to talk to me because he thought I was "really cute", and kissed me on the cheek. I thanked him and said that I had never been there before and was glad that someone spoke to me. Was I flattered? Darn right. And I met somebody that evening and had a great time. I am the shyest person in the world, and frankly, I can't wait to get back out with "my people", because that's the way I feel about it now.
Get out and you'll probably get over it. It's easier than you think, I know, I've done it.

Answer 4

you dont even have to. Guys that act too girls bother a lot of the more masculine gay men. It doesnt mean u are homophopbic or whatever. U like what you like, it doesnt make u a bad person. I kinda feel the same way. so just date the guy guys like I do.

Answer 5

Yeah i hate drags and girly dudes too (no offense yall), i only go out with the guy guys and crap. If I wanna go out with a girl i'll go with one right? I have a few girly friends but I dont do anything with em. It was hard for me to accept that I was gay too, but you'll get there. Good luck!

PeAcE!

Answer 6

You know, most gay men are not drag queens and don't act like girls. That's just a stereotype. Since you're young you probably haven't had the chance to meet a lot of gay men, but there are all kinds of gay people just like there are all kinds of straight people.

You certainly don't have to be a drag queen yourself or date drag queens. Just tell them they're not your type. But please do try to be tolerant of the more feminine gay men and don't say you hate them or anything -- they are just trying to live their lives and be happy, the same as anyone else.

Answer 7

"all the drags and guys acting like girls"??

where do you live in a gay cross dressing club? I dont know about you, but large majority of gay folks I know are as "normal" acting as everyone else. Sure, you get some outside of the "norm", but so what, you get straight folks outside the "norm" too.

It addes to the spice of life, dude. Don't fret it.

Answer 8

try meeting some gay guys who don't do drag and don't act too feminine - there are lots of them out there in the real world; it's just that they appear like normal everyday people living normal everyday lives thus they are harder to find. But you'd be surprised how many average guys are actually gay and once you find your way to them you are going to be way happier with being gay. Yea, I nkow the flamboyant side of being gay seems to be in the majority but it isn't; they are just more obvious.

Answer 9

Gay population is very diverse, just like any other population, it is strange you feel a strong hate toward any group, you might want to discuss it with a professional. It could be because these people like transgendered people are center of critisim and hatered. You might feel this group is bringing shame to the name gay because most people makes fun of them. Make peace with it, there are alot of cool people among them too, I hated feminen guys until I made a great friend with one and learned that it is not all that bad...you are an individual, you dont have to categorize yourself, happiness is inside of you

Answer 10

Can you remember your first influence that made you attracted to the same gender? It was a choice you made, perhaps when you were so young you did not even know it mattered. You can change if you choose, but you have to accept the change and be the change if that is what you choose. Here is a website that was written for pornography but you can use it for homosexuality as well, it is a mind issue. Give it time, it could take a few years even. http://www.ilovejesus.com/befree/pnarticle.html

Answer 11

dear grasshopper,
you are young, and you'll probably get over your aversion to the more feminine gay guys, especially since you want to. i, too, used to get a bit freaked out when one touched me, but now it doesn't bother me at all. and it took me a while (30 some yrs.) to be open enough about my gayness, shoot, i didn't even want to answer this question.... thank god for therapy.