Would you support your gay child?

Question

If your 14 year old came out to you and said "Mom/Dad.. I am gay" Would you accept it? How would you go about it? Would you have different feelings about your child or still love him/her as much as you ever did?

Answer 1

of course

♂♂

Answer 2

The first answer is yes. I would accept it. It's a big enough step to come out let alone stepping up and telling your parent's. I have always tried to have open, very open conversations with my kids. My folks were old school and you didn't talk about things like that. If they did talk, it was usually generalized conversation, nothing specific, certainly not details. If parents don't have any hang ups to begin with then there sure be no problems no matter what roads or lifestyles their kids take. As for feeling different towards them or not loving them? Let me put it to you this way. I think any parent that does not accept their own kids as they are or want to be should not have had kids to begin with. That is a crime in itself. I don't think there is a parent out there that doesn't look forward to grand kids to spoil, but the bottom line is that it is not about them it is about their child and what makes them happy. I have a daughter who is married with two kids. I have a son who is in his thirties and has never been married. He dates, but never lasts for long. He gets made at me when I kid him about masturbating. As I always tell him: "Show me a guy who doesn't or hasn't, and I'll show you a liar. " No matter what my kids try or decide in their lives I will support them.

Answer 3

My stepdaughter let us know she was gay when she was 16. We let her know that we loved her, but we wouldn't support her choice.

We never met the other girl, never wanted her over our home, didn't want anything to do with her. She was my daughters choice, we didn't have to agree with her choice. We had to let her know that life is full of choices and she had to make her decisions wisely as our choices have consequences in life.

She moved out after high school and moved in with her. She had rough times. We still let her know we loved her, but wouldn't support her choice. My stepdaughter declared bankruptcy at the age of 19. She couldn't hold a job, keep a car running, or enjoy her life.

After 6 years she figured that the gay lifestyle was a dead end street and gave it up. We let her move back in with us, provided guidance and direction in her life and helped her get back on her feet.

Now she's engaged to a fine young man and we couldn't be happier. I'm glad my wife and I stuck by our decisions as now our child is happy and leading a normal life. I'm glad we weren't enablers, that we just didn't give up and say, oh well, she was born that way. If we did that, our daughter would still be a mess.

Answer 4

Wow! That is very mean soulrbl34. I don't agree with homosexuality either. But I could never do anything like that to my child. I would still love him but be a little disappointed. It is kinda like when my bff told me she was bisexual. I was sort of mad at first but then I just learned to deal with it because she is someone I care about and I wouldn't let her sexuality come between our friendship. Same with my child I wouldn't let there sexuality come between what we have as a family. If I did that I wouldn't be a very good parent.

Answer 5

Yes. Just as I would if he told me he wanted to be a painter. You nurture who the child is, and what interests they have. Gay children, like straight children have to learn how to have healthy relationships. The sooner a gay child learns to love himself the faster he is on his way to have healthy and respectful relationships.

Answer 6

I would support him/her, unlike a lot of other straight people. I used to think it would be hard to accept that, but since I've seen the kind of hatred homosexuals face, I would want my child to come home to a place where he/she was loved and accepted.

Answer 7

one's child is one's child and mine would be mine to love and all whether they were gay or straight. Any parent who would disown or abuse their child solely because of the child's sexual orientation doesn't deserve to be a parent in the first place.

Answer 8

Lol, well, my answer may be pretty unnecessary and obvious considering I'M gay, but yes, I'd definitely support my gay child if I had one (I'm only 16 now, and even if I HAD a child, he certainly wouldn't be 14 years old, lol). I'd like to say that I'd be accepting of it even if I wasn't gay, but you can never be sure if you'd still be the same type of person if you we're of a different sexuality. But since I'm gay, I'd definitely be supportive of it. I'm not saying that it'd be something I'd be praying for, because I know the hardships he'd have to face because of it, but it wouldn't make me love him any more of any less. As to how I'd handle it ... well, first, if I was the first person he told, I'd caution him to be sure it's something that he's thought about and that he's SURE he's gay, because I know several people who had pronounced themselves bisexual and gay without TRULY thinking about it, and then taking it back when they realized they were just hoing through a confusing time in their lives. When he comes to me and is positive that he's gay, then I'd help (not push) him to come out to other people, like his friends and other family members (I wouldn't take it upon myself to tell others unless he really wanted me to, because thats something that he should be able to do himself. I'd make sure he was aware of everything he needs to know as a homosexual (how to keep himself safe from homophobes, how to stand up for himself and ignore what people say about him, etc...), and I'd most DEF. have to give him the revised Sex Talk, no matter how embarassing, because abstinence is abstinence, but theres still some things that he'd need to be aware of if when he DOES start having sex. Um ... and thats all I can really think of in handling the situation.
Of course my feelings for him would change, but not in a bad way. I've gotta say, I kinda DO want at least one gay kid, because I think it'd be interesting to be able to relate to him/her like that. I'd love my kids equally, no matter their sexuality, but I think it'd be interesting to be able to relate to a child of mine in that respect (oh, by the way, I'm talking about an adopted child I guess, since I very well cant have any children of my own in a homosexual relationship without a surrogate mum). Umm.. so yeah. I hope I answered your question sufficiently. Loves,
~!*Mr. Izzy Fabulous: Diva in Training*!~

Answer 9

it happened to me i was 14 told my mom and dad they still love me I'm 45 now my husband is 67 we have adopted 3 girls and one boy if that was their choose then we would love them

Answer 10

i love my child unconditionally and if they come out to me and say that they are gay, then that is their personal choice and my love for them will not change in any way. i would support my child and be there for them whenever they need me.

Answer 11

Absolutely.