What do you believe is the key to a successful marriage?

Question

thanks for all your great answers so far!

Answer 1

Communication
Commonality
Commitment

Answer 2

I have been married/divorced 3x and NOW I have finally discovered the most important factors in a successful marriage:

1) Must be in-love with the person and not just love/care about them
2) Trust is extremely important because once you fully trust your spouse, you can be completely open and vulnerable with them
3) Respect is critical as you should always put your spouse on a pedestal and treat them as if your life depended on them being happy
4) Never think/act like everything has to be equal. In other words, if you do something really nice for your spouse, do not expect her to do the same for you. If your spouse does something you dislike, do not do something that she doesn't like to get back at her. Throw these ideas/concepts out the window
5) Occassionally do things to spice up the marriage- whether it be a spur of the moment weekend getaway to Las Vegas, or concert tickets, or just a romantic drive to the beach and a candlelit dinner. Flowers are also nice once in a while, but don't go overboard
6) Always make sacrifices and compromises and focus on making your spouse happy and reaching mutual decisions. NEVER raise your voice, get physical, or call names, as you can NEVER take these things back. And as you probably know, once the argument is over, you always have regrets about what name you called or how you raised our voice.
7) It is perfectly okay to disagree and have arguments and debate. This is normal and to be expected in a healthy marriage where both people care and are thinking. However, learn how to argue by always staying calm, cool, rational and be open minded. It is okay to put a argument on hold to cool off and regroup.

If I had followed my own advice, I probably wouldn't be divorced 3x. I am now practicing these suggestions with my girlfriend and am going to get engaged soon. I will definitely not make the same mistakes.

Good luck.

Answer 3

A successful marriage is different for everyone but having watched my parents and also being married myself (my parents relationship is quite calm, mine is quite fiery) one of the things I see reflected in both of our marriages is true friendship. Not only do I love my husband he is my best friend.

We trust each other and will talk about anything, sometimes we argue but, I won't go to bed on an argument. As morbid as it may sound we both work on the principal that if it was the last time you talked could you live with the fact you had parted on an argument.

Make each other laugh, tell each other how you feel and reiterate the fact that you love them. If your partner needs help give it, if you need help then accept it knowing it is being given with love.

All the little things then come together and make the marriage work. If you work better as a couple than you do on your own and you are happier in that unit then your marriage is successful.

Answer 4

There is no such thing as a perfect marriage.
A great marriage is loving unconditionally. A great marriage is one where you want to make the other person shine. A great marriage is complimenting even when a compliment is for a daily task. A great partner hurts for their spouse when they are hurting. A great marriage is mostly perseverance and kindness. You want to be together no matter what life may bring. You have to keep communicating and you have to spend time together. In a great marriage you apologize when you're wrong and shut up when you're right. A great marriage involves forgiving and forgetting quickly.
Last, if you think you have a great marriage it doesn't matter what any one else thinks.

Answer 5

I remember a female friend telling me years ago what she felt for her was the key to a successful marriage.
She said she had to be a slave in the kitchen,and a sl*t in the bedroom.
I think she was clearly wrong as she was devorced within 5 years of being married.
Personally after 23yrs with my partner i think i have got it well and truely right on,we are both extremely happy and in love.
I think you must share an honesty between eachother that is beyond perfect.
You should always say sorry,even if it is'nt really your fault at times.
Compliment eachother on the simple things you do or say on a regular basis,and tell eachother how much you love them every day.
Keep the candles burning when it comes to your love life,never forget how attractive they are to you.
Always make eachother laugh,this can be joking around or just acting plain stupid.
Call it midlife crisis i just say thats me,but i have been like a dog on heat around my wife for the past 6 months.
She tells me to behave myself,and i just tell her its all her fault anyway.Its her fault she's so damned sexy,whats a real man supposed to do it works a treat though.

Answer 6

Communication ~ talk whenever you have a problem or think there is a potential problem. Holding it in can explode later on.

Honesty ~ If you need to hide anything from your spouse, then maybe you don't trust them enough? The fear of being judged can really keep a person tongue tied.


Passion ~ Be open to new ideas. But if it is not your cup of tea, don't be afraid to tell your spouse.

Sacrifice ~ Sometimes giving up stubbornness to try or do something for the other person can mean everything in the world. It's the little things that count.

Answer 7

Never expect it to be 50/50. Sometimes you have to give more and then the tables turn and your spouse ends up giving more. It's about support and respect and letting each other grow without growing apart. Communication is key; mature, loving communication before marriage and during marriage.

Answer 8

A successful marriage is a thing that has to work for both of you. I was married for 8 years, but my wife decieded to separate from me because we were too much like friends. So my advice, knowing what i do now is, enjoy your life together & live each moment together as it comes. Sure there will be ups and downs, as in most relationships, but laughter is a good start, with all the above comments taken into account trust, communication etc......The best advce is ....Be yourselves, if your mean't to be together, it will work regardless.

Answer 9

Hard work, Communication, Commitment, Respect, Love, Honesty, Trust, Acceptance.

Answer 10

Remembering that you and your spouse are human. I believe there are four things that make a good marriage......trust, communication, compassion, and respect. Having a successful marriage takes a lot of hard work from both and giving and being forgiving helps a whole lot.

Answer 11

Communication.