If you do not like how your child's father treated you, would you want him around your kid? If you feel he would be a bad influence is it wrong to keep him away? No abuse involved. Lets say the child's father has cheated on you and is a liar....you don't want him to teach your child his morals and ethics do you (esp your son)? Is it wrong to keep the father away from a child when the mother has been wronged by the father?
2007-07-12 08:04:08 · 26 answers · asked by knk724 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your morals and ethics aren't the greatest either. You had sex with a man you're not married to and then chose to have a child from him. Would you want your child kept away from you because you weren't exactly the Virgin Mary? Course not. Both of you made your mistakes, now let the father be a father.
2007-07-12 08:13:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes. If the child is not in danger. All you can do is teach your child morals and ethics and right from wrong. As they grow up they will see the lies and know they are wrong. If you keep the father away from the child chances are the child will end up resenting you in the end. You have to be the better the person by not talking negatively about the father in front of the child. It's very hard but can be done. You need to realise what he did he did to you, not his child. I always hate it when people answer these questions by saying "get over it" but in a sense that's what you have to do.
2007-07-12 15:16:37 · answer #2 · answered by Nikki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a very good question. I would say it depends upon the man. If he cheated & he's a terrible father than I say he shouldn't be around. But if he loves his children & shows his son the correct way to treat a woman than I say he shouldn't be kept away from him. It would be interesting to have that question in reverse. What if the woman is a cheater, liar & has no morals would you want that to be your daughters main influence. The reason I say this is because this is my situation & to top it off she has physical custody of the children & no court in America is going to take the kids away because she's a woman.
Going back to your question I try to lead by example to my children I'm not perfect but they don't see me drink, smoke (I don't anyway), do drugs (I don't anyway) or run around with loose women (cause I don't anyway). My son & daughter & I have spoken about the way they should treat people & how they should be treated in return so I hope that they listen to me more than they do their mother. In any case like in mine the parent that has the kids best interest at heart needs to be the more influencial of the two.
Just because a man made a child doesn't make him father, you have to earn that right. Ladies you need to give him the opportunity to do that!!!
2007-07-12 15:24:14 · answer #3 · answered by Big E 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is wrong to keep a child away from either of their parents unless there is some kind of physical or emotional abuse involved. While you may be concerned about the kind of influence the father will have on the child you should also be concerned with the kind of poor judgment that the child may inherit from the mother if she chose such a horrible man to create a child with.
2007-07-12 15:17:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, not for those reasons. It's you who made the mistake and chose the wrong man! What morals are you teaching your child when you had him without having been married? Look in the mirror. A child needs a father too.
2007-07-12 17:47:49 · answer #5 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Legally you cannot keep your child away from the father, however ethically wrong he may be (or you may feel he is).
The best you can do is reinforce your ethical values when your child is with you, and, if the father is blatantly unethical (to the point it could cause the child harm, emotionally, physically, spiritually, etc...) then try to produce that in a court of law in order to restrict visitation, or to have it at least moderated.
2007-07-12 15:12:19 · answer #6 · answered by capt.john.sparrow 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yep you are in the wrong. He cheated on YOU not the child. What your doing is using your son to punish the babies father for his actions. That's not cool. He may be an awful boyfriend but that has nothing to do with his fathering skills. Your gonna end up making your son resent you one day because you kept him away from his dad. Don't be surprised if one day he cuts contact with you to be with his father.
2007-07-12 15:13:28 · answer #7 · answered by tender loving dyke 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can understand why you would want to, however, it is always good for the child to have both parents in their life. There are so many men that don't want anything to do with their children. I would allow him to see the child, and you just make sure you are there to teach him about being a good person and how not to lie. I know it will be hard but I think it will be for the best. Good Luck to you!
2007-07-12 15:08:46 · answer #8 · answered by frawlicious 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can not keep a child from his father. That child needs his father. Needs his guidance and input. You have right to make that judgement. any court will insist on the child fostering a relationship with both parents.
2007-07-12 17:23:13 · answer #9 · answered by Shootsscores 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, no matter how much you dislike the father it is still important for him to be involved in his child's life. And considering how many dads aren't involved, it's good that he wants to be. You just have to be sure that as your son gets older you are also his teacher of morals.
2007-07-12 15:58:57 · answer #10 · answered by mvngs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋